Well, if she wanted to play it that way, then I could play it mine. “You said something on the phone before.”
“Whatever I said, can we please just pretend I didn’t?” Her face was filled with desperation and pleading. Her cheeks were burning and when I pushed her hair off her face, I saw her anxious eyes.
“Or…”
“No. No or. Can you please forget I said it? Please, Hayden.”
“Skye, look at me. Please. Just look at me.”
Slowly and stubbornly, she raised her chin and opened her beautiful eyes. Fear and embarrassment were the last things I’d ever want to be responsible for thrusting upon her.
“There, you happy now?” she snapped.
Now was my moment and I didn’t hesitate to take it. “Yeah, sweetheart, I am. You know why?”
“Why?”
“Because, I love you too.”
32
SKYE
Hayden said he loved me.
He said it.
Out loud.
For both of us to hear.
I couldn’t believe it.
I couldn’t breathe.
Here he was, the man himself, the man who carried the weight of the world on his shoulders so others didn’t have to, kneeling in front of me, telling me he loved me. This couldn’t be real. This shit didn’t happen to girls like me. It just didn’t.
From the moment the words had slipped out, I’d been in full freak-out mode. I hadn’t meant to say it. Even though I was pretty sure I was head over heels in love with Hayden, I wasn’t ready to tell him. But as soon as I’d blurted it out, over something as stupid as a pastry, I felt like I couldn’t breathe and the walls were closing in on me. Unable to sit still, I’d jumped in the shower, trying to ignore all the ideas Marianne had planted yesterday about seizing the day and time being precious. I knew there were no guarantees when it came to tomorrow, I was well aware of that fact, but telling Hayden I loved him like that, yeah, I hadn’t been ready for that.
“Y-y-you love me?” I stuttered, not entirely sure if I heard him right. Surely he said something else. Meant something else.
“Yep. I love you, Skye. And I know it’s fast but you know what, life’s short. Why waste it not telling people how you feel about them.”
He was so open and honest and real, I couldn’t help it. I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around his neck, squeezing him so tightly he had to pat my back to remind me he needed to breathe.
I loosened my grip and pulled back to look at him. Sincerity was written all over his face. Not wanting to leave him standing out there alone on that limb. “I never meant to say it the way I did. It just slipped out, and then I panicked.”
“I know.”
“And I didn’t want you to hate me.”
“I could never hate you, Skye.”
Leaning forward, I kissed him. It was slow and filled with everything we weren’t saying. Hayden lifted me up by my hips and laid me down across the bed, hovering over me, treating me like I was precious.
“Are you going to fuck me now?” I asked, praying the answer was yes.
“No.”
