Chapter 28
Mia
I floated on a cloud all day. Usually I was the first to comment how pathetic girls were who went all gaga over a guy, and unfortunately in this moment, I was one of the worst. I’d gone into the gym, and after almost an hour staring at the same pile of forms, doing nothing more than shuffling them from one side of my desk to the other, I gave up and went and joined a class. I had energy I needed to burn. If I was spending the night in Derek’s bed again, I had to do something to calm myself down or I couldn’t be held accountable for my actions.
Stepping up to the door, I balanced the pizza in one hand and the plastic bags in the other. Ringing the door bell, I stepped back and waited. It was weird. I was nervous. My stomach was doing flip-flops and I didn’t understand it. It was only Zoe. Derek wasn’t even home. Suddenly my backpack felt like it weighed a ton and the impulse to turn and run was almost too enticing.
“Hey Mia. Come on in.” Zoe beamed as she waved me inside, taking the pizza. “What’d you bring?”
“I think the more accurate question is, what didn’t I?”
Together we unpacked the shopping. I’d gone overboard, I know that. But it had been so long, since I’d had a girl’s night in, and truthfully, I was still trying to impress Zoe. I needed to get on her good side. I knew how important she was in Derek’s life, so I needed her on my side. It was more than that, though. I wanted her on my side. Together we quickly unpacked the chocolate biscuits, ice cream, and wine.
Three hours, two bottles of wine, way too many biscuits, and a few Ryan Gosling movies later and I was more than ready to call it a night. I yawned loudly as I stretched out my legs in front of me. “I think that’s me.”
“Yeah, me too. Do you need anything before I head to bed?”
“I’m all right. Derek said just to make myself at home.”
“Absolutely. Well, good night then.”
Pushing open Derek’s bedroom door, I turned back to face Zoe, who had a quirky smile. “I had a great time tonight, Mia. Thank you. And as for Derek, I love him. With everything I have and everything I am, I love him. You’re good for him. I know you are. I just hope you know that you are.”
I couldn’t help myself. I dashed across the hallway and wrapped my arms around Zoe. In a few simple words, she’d managed to squash any lingering doubts I had and make me feel like I belonged. More importantly though, if Zoe could see it, then maybe, just maybe I wasn’t in this alone.
“Have a good night, Mia. He usually gets in around two.” She waggled her eyebrows.
I had no words. How was I supposed to respond? I knew exactly what Zoe was insinuating. I might be blonde, but I wasn’t dumb. So I bit my lip, nodded, and remained silent. Instead, I stepped inside Derek’s room and shut the door with a soft click. The moment it shut, I felt my heart take off like a freight train. I was alone in Derek’s bedroom and I was freaking out. My only saving grace was that Derek wasn’t here to see me panic.
Trying to pull myself together, I shuffled into the bathroom, changed into my pyjamas, and brushed my teeth. It felt odd to be getting myself ready for bed in someone else’s bedroom…and not just someone else’s, but Derek’s. Finishing up quickly, I made my way back into Derek’s room, pulled back the covers, and noticed the new sheets. Tonight I was slipping into navy sheets that smelt fantastic. The whole room smelt clean. A moment later, I settled back against the pillows and killed the light.
What felt like a life time later, I glanced at the clock. It wasn’t quite midnight and I was wide awake.
Mia: Guess where I am???
I couldn’t help it. I was surrounded by everything Derek except the one thing I wanted the most. The man himself. It didn’t take long before a reply came.
Derek: ???
Mia: In bed…
Mia: Your bed. <3
Derek: You’re killing me, Tinkerbell.
The wide smile that crept over my face made my cheeks ache. After another twenty minutes of tossing and turning, I turned the light back on and leapt from the bed. I knew it was wrong. Every single fibre of my being reminded me that it was wrong. But I couldn’t stop. I walked around the room, my fingers lingering on every surface. I flicked through magazines on the nightstand, checked out the photos on the wall, then I found it. It must have fallen out when I’d been tossing and turning in the bed. On the floor, right near Derek’s pillow, was the shirt I’d worn the night before. Folded perfectly. He hadn’t tossed it in the wash. He’d kept it. Deliberately. My heart felt like it was going to burst. Picking it up, I set it back under his pillow. If this was a secret Derek wanted to keep, I’d let him. I wouldn’t even make fun of him for it. Well, at least I’d try not to.
Climbing back into the huge, empty bed, I knocked over the stack of magazines, sending them spilling to the floor. Carefully I picked them up, and that’s when I found it. I know I’d been snooping, hell, I’d even pulled open his drawers looking for secrets, but I hadn’t really expected to find anything. Derek didn’t seem the type. But then there it was. A stack of unopened mail. Quickly and anxiously I flicked thought the stack. Mostly there wasn’t anything that caught my eye. Well, at least not until I got to the bottom of the pile. There was one with a postmark from the police force. It looked official. It looked intimidating. It felt heavy in my hands. The nosy bitch part of me was dying to rip it open and see what it was all about. Instead I put it back where I found it and turned my curiosity to the matching envelopes. One was addressed to Zoe, the other Derek. His had been opened, Zoe’s remained sealed.
“What the hell?”
Setting them aside, with heavy thoughts I turned off the light and flopped back against the pillows. With my mind swirling, I knew exactly who I needed right now. The one person who would know what to say. The one person who would understand. The one who knew everything. Every sordid and every dirty detail. I needed Josie.
Mia: Can we talk?
It was surprising when my phone chirped almost immediately.
Josie: What’s up?
