“Yes, Mum.”
“Smart ass.”
I felt my shoes being tugged off my feet and I know I should have told her to stop, that the smell alone may kill her, but the moment she peeled my damp socks from my feet I had to admit I felt better. And when her tiny, soft fingers started kneading the balls of my feet, I moaned embarrassingly. Fuck, it felt good. Too good. If I was guaranteed this sort of treatment every time I overdid it running, I’d do it more often.
“Feel good?”
My eyes had fallen closed and my hands were resting in the centre of my chest, which was still heaving beneath my damp shirt. “So good,” I mumbled.
“Well, while you’re lying there quiet I need to say something…” Zoe’s soft voice trailed away and I felt every muscle in my body clench.
Before everything, I knew Zoe well enough, but not so intimately that I could pick her mood by the way she carried her shoulders or the way her voice caught on the end of a word. Now, my eyes could be closed and my body aching and I knew. It was strange and unexpected how it had happened, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. This is what it meant to have family. And Zoe was mine. No one was coming between us. Not now. Not ever.
Fighting the urge to open my eyes and look at her, I murmured again and forced my focus on the fantastic feeling in my toes. Seriously, how did I not know she could do this?
“I just wanted to apologize for everything, Derek. After Spencer…I was a mess. And I wasn’t your mess to clean up, but you did it anyway. You could have walked away and left me. Not once did you even look like you were going to. No matter how many times I tried to push you away.”
I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t lie there motionless and let her pour her soul out thinking I wasn’t one hundred and ten percent focused on her. Sitting up, I ignored the protest in my back, knowing I’d pay for it later, but I didn’t care. Zoe was here, and for the first time in a long time, she was talking. Not just saying words, but really talking. I was not about to let her pour her heart out alone.
“Zoe…if you really thought for a second I would ever or could ever walk away from you, no matter what you did, you don’t know me. Or Spencer.” Her eyebrow quirked up questioningly. “I could never walk away from you, Zoe. You’re family. Besides, Spencer would haunt both our asses.”
She laughed. A real honest to goodness giggle. I couldn’t help it. I joined her.
And like that the heaviness lifted.
For the next hour, we sat cross-legged on the floor recounting stories from the old days. Stories of all the mischief and mayhem the three of us caused. It felt fantastic.
I’d never admit it to anyone, least of all Zoe, but ever since I’d moved to Melbourne, I’d felt disconnected from the world. She was the only reason I was here. It wasn’t my home. It wasn’t where I wanted to be. It wasn’t what I wanted. Nothing about my life was the way I imagined. Zoe was the only reason. I hated being a security guard. It was a bullshit job. Don’t get me wrong, it needed to be done. And it needed to be done by good, loyal, honest guys, but I wasn’t one of them. Standing around nightclubs or shopping centres watching the world pass by wasn’t my idea of a career. I was born to be a cop. I’d just needed a break after everything that had gone down. I never told Zoe the truth, I couldn’t. I didn’t resign from the force, not technically. Instead I took a twelve month leave of absence to get my shit together. At first they weren’t happy, but when I explained the situation, they seemed to get it.
“So,” Zoe’s voice pulled me back from my thoughts. “I hear you have a hot date tonight.”
There was a wicked smile on her face and mischief in her eyes. I loved seeing it there. It was right where it belonged. I’d happily be the butt of all of her jokes for the rest of her days if it made her smile like that.
“I have a date tonight, yes.”
“With Mia?”
“Yes. With Mia.”
“She’s hot!”
“Yes. I guess she is.”
“Are you blind, Derek? Mia’s fucking hot!”
I couldn’t help it. I laughed loudly as I stumbled to my feet before offering Zoe my hand and pulling her up behind me. I might not have regretted stretching before I went running, but I was certainly regretting not cooling down properly. “Have you got something to tell me, Zoe? You switching teams?”
“You’re an ass, you know that?”
“Yep! But you love me anyway.”
As she stomped off towards her bedroom, she couldn’t help herself. She never could. She had to toss one last sarcastic remark over her shoulder. “You’re lucky I do.”
And she was right. I was damn lucky I had Zoe in my life. It was one thing I wouldn’t change for the world. In fact, even if she didn’t know it, even if she didn’t believe it, I’d upend my world to keep her in it, and not just because of the promises we’d made as kids to protect her always. Zoe was special. But right now, she was going to become the number two woman on my list. A pixie blonde was about to slip into the number one position for the evening. Mia. Heading towards the bathroom, I still had no fucking idea where to take her or what to do tonight. All I knew was it had to be something.
I showered, shaved, and even did my hair. I don’t remember the last time I made an attempt to at least look half decent. After splashing on some cologne Zoe’d bought me for Christmas, I pulled on some shoes, stuffed my phone, keys, and wallet in my pocket, and headed into the kitchen. I wanted a beer to calm my nerves, but I was driving, so it would have to be a Coke. I hated being nervous. The feeling of being out of control didn’t work for me. Not one little bit. In fact, it pissed me right off. I’d stupidly hoped that while I’d been standing under the pounding water I’d get some kind of idea what to do tonight, but I had nothing. Any chump could take her to a restaurant for dinner, and the truth was, I didn’t really like dinner as a first date. There were too many expectations.
“About time!”
