Chapter 8
Mia
I had no right to be pissed off. Or hurt. Or jealous. I had no claim to Derek. Hell, I’d only met the man twice and spent less than half an hour in his presence. Knowing all of that and convincing myself to believe it was proving quite a challenge. I’d seen the truck pull in and was on alert instantly. I hated cars like that. They were big, bulky, and belonged on a farm. I’d sat there like an idiot unable to tear my eyes away. I watched as Zoe and Derek sat in the front wrapped up in each other. It was true, he didn’t kiss her like he would a girlfriend and he didn’t treat her like anything other than a best friend, but it still got under my skin and pissed me off.
Zoe stepped through the door and offered me a half smile as she punched in her code before vanishing through the doors. I couldn’t figure that one out. When she’d joined, it seemed almost reluctantly. This was the fourth time I’d seen her this week. I know I shouldn’t have paid her any more attention than I did the others, but there was something about Zoe that fascinated me. And it wasn’t just her flat mate, although he was pretty fascinating. Forcing my thoughts back on the job at hand, I scooped up the pile of papers from the reception counter and made a beeline for my shoebox of an office. This paperwork wasn’t going to do itself, unfortunately.
Two tired hours later, I’d had enough. My eyes were aching and my brain had left the building ages ago. The numbers on the screen were blurring together and making no sense. I’d look again tomorrow. Now, I’d sneak in and join the last fifteen minutes of the boxing class. Punching something always made me feel better.
Yanking off my sweater, I tossed it on my chair, grabbed a clean towel, and headed down the hallway, following the sound of Mackenzie’s voice as she barked out orders. Pausing at the door, I listened for a few beats as she spat commands. Mackenzie wasn’t the most perceptive person when it came to human emotions, but she knew her way around a gym and what to look out for. She was a damn good trainer and had impossibly high standards. Stepping inside the room, I noticed everyone was paired off, taking it in turns punching out combinations on the practice mitts. That is, everyone but Zoe. Instead she remained in the back corner practicing her punches with a heavy bag. I wasn’t surprised to see her as the one who was without a partner, but it made me incredibly sad. Nodding at Mackenzie, I grabbed a set of mitts from the tub and headed towards Zoe.
“Want to be my partner?” I offered.
“I’m fine. Thanks anyway,” she replied meekly, not even turning around.
I couldn’t let it go. It was one of my biggest failings. I didn’t know when to just turn around and walk away I was stubborn like that. And Zoe was today’s project. “Zoe?”
She spun around with her arms ready to throw her next punch, forcing me to step back and out of reach. “I’m so sorry…”
“It’s fine. Really, Zoe, no worries. Want to be my sparring partner?”
She looked unsure. Scared even. Indecision covered her face, and although it didn’t fade, she nodded before raising her hands defensively. I felt like a shit. I didn’t want to scare her. Hell, this whole place was designed to make women feel safe. I planned it that way. Every dead bolt, every security measure, every image on the walls, all of it. They were my choices. Ones I’d made for my own reasons. Reasons others didn’t need to know or understand. But it was definitely to reduce tears and stress. Now I was the asshole responsible for putting fear on patrons’ faces. It was a shitty feeling.
After a quick nod, I assumed the stance and threw my first punch. She didn’t flinch. A few hits later and things were feeling good. I was bouncing on my toes; my shoulders were warm and my arms were feeling ready. When it was time to switch, I planted my feet and readied myself. Zoe’s first hit came and it was pathetic at best. She barely connected, and the little that did had no substance behind it. No intention. No power. No commitment.
“That was good, Zoe. Now try and put your weight behind it.”
“I can’t.”
“Yeah you can. I know you’ll do great.”
“I can’t. What if…”
Her eyes dropped. Something was wrong, seriously wrong here. My heart broke for her. I wanted to help her, more than I’d ever wanted to help anyone in my life. “What if what, Zoe?”
“I hit you.”
I barely caught the words, they were so shallow. She wasn’t afraid of me, she was afraid of hurting me. Well, fuck me…I didn’t see that coming. “We’ll be fine. Just take it slow. Try a left hook.”
With her eyes wide and fixed on me, I smiled encouragingly. She was standing smack bang in the middle of a boxing class but didn’t want to hit anyone. At least that explained the bag. She could still do what she needed to and no one would get hurt. Slowly, Zoe pulled her arm back and let go. She had strength there. She’d kept it hidden, and I was caught off guard, but did everything in my power to not let her see the surprise on my face as it registered. She didn’t need to know she unbalanced me. I could already see she had no confidence and me congratulating her on it would only inflame the situation.
“Good work. That was awesome. Want to go again?”
“O-okay.”
Ten sweaty minutes later we were both panting hard and my arms felt like soggy noodles. My heart was pounding in my chest and it felt great. I loved the endorphin rush. It was completely addictive. Who needs drugs when you had this natural high? I could ride it all day. And often I did.
Grabbing my towel, I ran it through my hair and patted my face. I needed a shower, but that could wait until I made it home. The gym would be closing in half an hour and once everyone was gone, I’d head out too. Even though I didn’t have to be here today, I couldn’t not be. If I was here I might as well make myself useful. Even if that meant doing all the bullshit jobs, it didn’t matter to me. It was my business, if I didn’t care, I couldn’t really expect anyone else to.
“Thanks, Mia. I…I had fun.”
Zoe’s face didn’t match her words. It was like she was regurgitating what was expected, not saying what she really felt. It was truly painful and pitiful to watch. As much as I wanted to call her out, I didn’t want to make her feel any more uncomfortable than she already was.
“Anytime, Zoe. If you want to, let me know when you’re going to do another class, I’d be happy to partner you. I’m here pretty much all the time anyway, so just sing out.”
“That’d be great. Thank you. I better go call Derek.” Without another word, she scooped up her water bottle, slung her towel over her shoulder, and headed out.
“Have a great night, Zoe.”
