“It needed to be done. Desperately!”
“I could have done it,” I sulked. I was being a moody bitch and I knew it, but I couldn’t stop myself. I didn’t need him swooping in and playing the hero. Not again. He’d done it so many times for me recently I was worried he was enjoying wearing a cape. The truth was I couldn’t let myself get used to playing the damsel in distress. I needed to stand on my own two feet because one day he wouldn’t be there to catch me. That thought freaked me out.
I watched as Spencer stalked around the bench deliberately and sat beside me before spinning me so I was staring straight at him. I wanted to look away. Desperately. I was like a fly caught in his web. I couldn’t. My gaze was fixed on his. “Zoe, I know you can. But I wanted to. You need to let me help you. Even if it’s just for a little bit. Please.” The pleading in his eyes killed me. I knew I couldn’t say no.
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Don’t look so surprised,” I admonished. “And Spencer…”
“Yeah, Zoe?”
“Thank you. You know, for?”
“It’s okay, Pippi. Forget it. Now eat up! We’ve got a big day ahead of us.”
“We do?”
“We do. So eat!”
We finished our breakfast, and while I found some shoes, Spencer washed up. Walking back into the lounge room, I was greeted by incessant beeping. “What the??” I asked.
“That, Pippi, is your phone. I found it under the lounge. Dead as a door nail. So I plugged it in and my guess is right about now it’s charged enough to be finally receive all those text messages I sent.”
“I didn’t ignore you, Spence…”
“I know, Zoe. I know.”
“I just needed time.”
As I admitted it, I realised how true it was. Time was exactly what I needed. Time and space. Coming home and hiding under the covers for a week hadn’t helped. Well, it had in one way. For the first time I didn’t feel completely exhausted. Now it was time to start fighting my way out of the darkness. Fighting my way out of the mess that had become my life. It was time to reclaim it.
I pulled my shoes on, stuffed my phone in my pocket, and reached for Spencer’s hand. I might have made the decision to get back on my feet on my own, but that didn’t mean I had to do it right this minute. Especially when I had Spencer’s warm, strong shoulders to lean on.
We spent the day ignoring the elephant in the room and instead we walked the streets in the sunshine. We’d stopped for coffee in a cafe on the water, caught a movie at the casino, and generally enjoyed being together. Everywhere we went, Spencer was the perfect gentleman. He opened doors for me, guided me in front of him with a light, reassuring hand on my back, and he never once let go of my hand.
“I’m stuffed!” he sighed, flopping onto the lounge as we walked through the door.
The fresh air had done me a world of good. I felt refreshed and invigorated, but tired. “Yeah, me too.” The sun was setting and the temperature started to plummet. “What do you want to do tonight?” I offered, trying to sound blasé.
“I’m easy.” Spencer smiled, kicking off his shoes and dropping his big feet on my coffee table.
“Pizza and a movie?”
“Sounds good.” Spencer yawned, tipping his head back and letting his eyes fall closed.
For the first time I looked at him and really saw him. He was exhausted. The snoring was heavy and I knew Spencer was asleep. He probably needed it. He’d arrived early this morning, which meant he’d driven through most of the night. He needed rest and I needed to let him.
Pulling my phone out, I started scrolling through the messages. I’d never received so many texts before. My inbox was full. I checked everyone else’s but Spencer’s. For some reason I couldn’t bring myself to read the words he’d sent me. Instead I read text after text from workmates, my boss, and Katie, all hoping I was okay and would be back on deck soon, but they were superficial.
Spencer snorted and wriggled. He was out to the world. Grabbing the blanket from the back of the lounge, I draped it over him before stepping back and taking one last lingering look before I headed back to my bedroom.
Opening the closet, I looked at the options I had for clean sheets. I had white sheets with tiny pink and yellow flowers on them or a plain, apricot set that had seen better days. Definitely nothing that I’d want anyone to see. Ever. Grabbing the closest set, I quickly remade the bed, then nestled down amongst the mountain of pillows and prepared to read the messages.
Twenty minutes later I had tears streaming down my face. Even Spencer’s attempts at being angry were endearing. Not that I’d ever tell him.
“What’s with the tears?”
