“You will be out of action for anywhere from a day to a month. The power you have gained from the mating ritual so far will be lost. You will never be able to mate with the king again.”
I considered all of that. “Is breaking a ritual common?”
“If mates do not remain together out of strong feeling, then they remain together for power. No, breaking a ritual is not common.” He set to mashing up the brains of the Svoli, then paused after. “Your grandmother remained with me for power.”
I didn’t say I was sorry. My grandfather would have no clue what I meant. “I didn’t know.”
“Her love for your father, our son, was real. I knew she would give her life. And so, at the right time, I ensured that I would live on by breaking our mating in the manner I described.”
I couldn’t detect any guilt in his words, and the amazing thing about my kind was that demons really didn’t feel guilt very often or at all. They did what they were capable of doing and didn’t apologize for it. Maybe I struggled to agree with their choices sometimes, but part of me could appreciate the simplicity of their ways.Use the knife or be stabbed by the knife.“You told me you were unconscious for weeks.”
“I was. Two and a half weeks. You will be out for longer.”
“How can you tell?”
“Because you loved the demon king. My mate never loved me, and I never loved her.”
My grandmother and grandfather had shared one love, though, their son. My grandfather had sorely felt the loss of his child, and he might hate Carmine even more than me. I could only hate Carmine that much if he hurt Adeuto.
Now, my grandfather lovedmyson as he had loved his own. I’d learned that my grandfather existed half in fantasy. In the fantasy, Adeuto was his real son, and they were both safe from the burden and blood spilling that came with immense power. Because of that, my grandfather feared nothing more than history repeating itself. It was why I didn’t fear leaving each day. He knew Carmine had to die for Adeuto to live. Then my grandfather’s fantasy could live on too.
I was the only one capable of making that happen, so my grandfather needed me, and therefore I could trust him. A thriving example of a healthy demon relationship.
Beyond that, though, I believed there was something real between us. I was his granddaughter, and that meant something to him. There was a relief in his blue gaze when he looked at me. Unlike Adeuto, Carmine would never hunt me. Not now I was his mate-intended. Though if I hadn’t been, then he would have killed me like the threat to the throne I was. As my twin had discovered.
How different might life have been if I had birthed a girl? My grandfather would have told me how to break the mating ritual years ago, and I might have carved out a life here that wasn’t always overshadowed by fear of the future. A girl’s smoke would erupt like all demons coming into their own, but hers wouldn’t be a death sentence. Carmine might have learned of her, but he wouldn’t have any reason to kill our daughter. Females did not rule the demon realm.
“How was Adeuto today?”
“Spilled everything given to him. Cried half the day. Laughed the rest of it. Typical child.”
I smiled, but a mother’s pain permeated my chest. I might have just had my last conversation with my son. Winning Tiers tomorrow wasn’t assured, especially with the assumption that all the contestants in the Pinnacle would unite against me.
Even if I made it through Tiers tomorrow, would Carmine let me portal away from the fortress? I didn’t want Adeuto to be a child who remembered his mother’s empty promise. “Does he miss me?”
“Yes.”
Guilt crushed me. Oh to be a full-blooded demon.
My grandfather draped the Svoli skin over a rock. “Missing you is inevitable. He has no doubt of your love for him. He will live because of what you do today and the next.”
As I was painfully aware. I stood. “Please make sure he eats his vegetables.”
“I’m his grandfather. I’ll do what I want.”
I’d tried. “Do you need anything?”
“No, granddaughter. Begone. Show no mercy in Tiers tomorrow, and if you get a chance to kill the slug who rules us, do so slowly and painfully.”
Just a few kind words of encouragement from a grandfather to his granddaughter. I opened a portal to one of my hideaway points. “I’ll do my best.”
Three portals, a dunking in a river, and a change of clothes later, and I stepped through into my room again.
I sat on the bed and stared at the stone wall of my chamber, my thoughts with my sleeping child who now seemed five worlds away.
I wanted to give up.
I wanted to bide my time with my son and bear witness to his every smile. I wanted to raise him and protect him as I only trusted myself to do.
