Not again,I thought. Even my mind whined out the words as I sucked harder at the paci.
When I was with Sir, I didn’t have so much trouble with going to the bathroom. Maybe he put something in my food to make sure I went every few days. I don’t know. Whatever the reason, I didn’t likenotgoing.
Maybe that’s why Sir gave me milk, other than to make me suffer. At least then I’d be able go to the bathroom and not be a big baby about it.
I sniffed, pressing myself further into Sabastian. He’d make the pain go away. He did last time, even if I was mostly in a panic attack through the whole ordeal.
The TV was still on, something I had been sort of listening to off and on while I laid against Sabastian’s chest, both of his arms keeping me safe.
I had to wonder why I couldn’t just be normal. Why couldn’t my body just do what it needed without pain all the time? Why did it still make me suffer after everything?
Another whimper caught in my throat. This time, Sabastian’s arms tightened around me. which, really didn’t help since all it did was put pressure on my lower stomach.
“Hurties.” I mumbled, trying to fight off the impending tears.
“What hurts, little one?” His voice was so soft, so caring, that I gave up trying to fight against the tears.
Not able to find the words, I blindly searched out his hand, taking it and placing it right where I felt the pain. When he pressed just a bit, another pained whimper came out of me.
Please make it go away,I begged, sucking as hard as I possibly could on the paci.
“Alright. Can you walk?”
No.I didn’t make a move to get off his lap, either.
“You’re gonna have to at least stand, so I can pick you up better.”
“Don’t wanna.”
“I know, little one, but you have to. Come one. Stand up so I can get a better hold on ya.”
Fine,I sighed, tears falling.
At the smallest movement of me getting off of his lap, pain spiked again. This time stronger as things moved inside.
Thankfully, it didn’t take Sabastian long to stand up too, picking me up to where I could wrap myself around him once more. He pulled up my skirt so my legs would wrap around his hips, his hands under my butt to keep me against him.
Not that I wasn’t going anywhere. My arms were tight around his neck.
With each step up the stairs, my body shifted, causing whimpers to turn to deep whines at the back of my throat.
“We’ll get all sorted out. Just hang on, little one.”
I sniffed, trying to get my body to relax. I knew it was a loss, though. It all was.
I was so freaking pathetic. I couldn’t even release my bowels without help.
How could someone want me if I couldn’t even take care of own personal stuff? I should be able to freaking use the bathroom without someone coaxing me through it.
I was so stupid.
“I gotta set you down now. Just for a moment.”
I breathed in, forcing a whimper down as my feet touched the cold bathroom floor.
“Oh, sweet Oakley.” Instantly, Sabastian’s hands were on my cheeks, wiping away my tears with his thumbs as the rest of his hands held my face. “Have you gone at all since the last time I had to help?”
I shook my head. I had tried, though.
