“He?” That was Nathan. “Have you seen this kid in your lap. Sure looks like a girl.”
“Believe me, Oakley is all boy under these clothes. What he wears doesn’t define his gender. If he likes skirts, than that’s what I’ll buy him. If he wants to wear pants, than I can do that too. As long he finds something to like, that’s all I want.”
I liked being in his arms, but I didn’t say that. That’d be too many words and I’d have to let go of the paci to say them. So instead, I just breathed him in, letting my eyes close again.
Maybe, if I willed it all away, these two people would go away.
“Will you be bringinghimto dinner with the fam next week?”
“No,” Sabastian scuffed. “I don’t think meeting the entire family is the best idea. Oakley’s skittish and afraid of his own shadow as it is. Mom would overwhelm him way too easily.”
“You know you can’t hide him away forever.”
“I’m not. I took him out shopping today. Which, he did better than I expected.”
“Then why is he in your lap like a baby? Are you having sex with him?”
“Absolutely not. He’s in my lap because he had a small meltdown. It’s either this, or he’d be passed out in bed with an anxiety med. This is a better option.”
I agreed. Being attached to the man was far better than any meds. Well, I probably would be lying on him anyways if he had given me a pill.
“That means he has his own room.”
Sabastian didn’t reply to that one.
“Hey, you.” I jerked, forgetting for a moment that I still had the paci in as I turned my head to look at Molly. I hadn’t heard her come closer, or sit down next to Sabastian. “I think we should let these two men talk without us. Whatta ya say? You can show me your room, maybe? Or we can get a snack.”
I glanced up at Sabastian, who was looking at me. “Whatever you want to do, little one.”
“You are fucking him, aren’t you?”
“Shut up, Nathan.”
“There’s a stuffed animal on the bed,” Sabastian went on, ignoring the grumbles from his brother. “Sippy cups-“
“I know where they are, Bash.” Molly’s eyes went back to me right before I laid my head back down on his shoulder. “Come on. Little boys, or girls for that matter, don’t need to hear bad grown up words.” A pause. “I bet your hungry. Maybe some goldfish?”
“No fishes.”
“Crackers, then. I’m sure Bash has something that you’d enjoy.”
“You can go, Oakley.”
But I didn’t want to.
I looked up at Sabastian, hoping that he could see that I didn’t want to be anywhere else.
“Dude. Can he even go pee without you holding his fucking hand?”
A blush rose up.
“Go with Molly. get a snack, a drink and your stuffie. I’ll be here when you’re done.”
It took too much work to pull myself away from Sabastian. Instantly, my front was cold, and I felt lost inside. Tears gathered in my eyes as I dropped them to the floor, wrapping my arms around myself.
“Snack or stuffie first?” A small touch to my elbow got me to look up.
I shrugged. I didn’t want either if I couldn’t have Sabastian.
