In the bathroom, I quickly pulled the thing from my butt, feeling my body’s relief at doing so. Then, I took another pill, this one blue, before I used the toilet and washed up the best that I could.
The makeup was still scattered around on the sink, unopened. One thing said lip gloss, so I grabbed it before twisting it in my hands.
I was sure I knew how to use that one thing, at least. It seemed similar to chapstick, which I did get on a regular basis. Sir hated seeing me with dry or chapped skin. My skin was the only thing he liked. He liked how soft it was, even if it was dirty and bruised from his doing.
Opening the wrapping, I pulled the stick out before smearing a bit around my lips. It smelt like vanilla, coating my lips in a shiny sheen of whatever it was made out of.
A loud comminution upstairs got me moving and forced me to tear my green eyes from the blurry mirror.
Whatever was to come of me next would just be another step closer to death.
Chapter 4
Oakley
I didn’t see Sir before leaving the house for the first time since my mother left me there. I was barely nine years old when she left one night, and didn’t come back. I was certain she was dead, just like Sir said she was. But there was a small part of me that hoped she was still alive. That she’d come back looking for me someday.
Sitting in the car, thankful that the seat was ten times better than my bed was, the man began driving away from the house. I wouldn’t miss it, even though I’d most likely return there someday.
My hand was handcuffed to the door handle, the cold metal digging into my thin wrist with each bump of the tires.
“Just to be safe,” the man had uttered when he slipped the cuffs on the door while I watched wide-eyed. I wasn’t going to run. I had no energy to do much of anything but sit there.
Safe from what?
He didn’t speak, both hands clasped on the steering wheel. When we passed lights, I could see how white his knuckles were from his grasp.
Was he expecting me to act out? Was he waiting for me to throw a fit? I wouldn’t do either. I knew better. I wasn’t going to disappoint Sir more than I already had in my short life.
As the car’s tires vibrated over the road, something began to wake up inside me. With each movement, each bump, a heat grew in my lower belly. As the minutes ticked by, I couldn’t stay still.
My legs were over one another, then I’d switch them. Moving to sit up better in the seat didn’t help the growing need. With each movement I made, my butt stung more and more, and the thing I wore over my penis tightened and pulled against the other part.
I didn’t like the feelings, yet my body wanted something I didn’t know how to release.
My eyes widened, remembering the few times that my penis got hard and Sir came in, beating it back to its place. He’d hit me with a belt at those times, leaving welts on my upper legs and back.
Was that going to happen with this man when he noticed?
Looking down at my crotch, nothing stood up, poking through the material like the other times. Maybe the thing Sir forced me to wear was to help me learn to not let such things control me. Sir controlled me, and no one else.
“You okay?” The man’s voice caused me to jerk. The metal cuff clanked against the plastic interior of the door at my quick movement.
I quickly nodded, even though he probably didn’t see it in the dark.
“We’re almost home.”
Great, I thought. Who knows what he was going to do with me there? I didn’t want to consider the many ideas that could easily spin out of control within my mind.
I breathed deeply, wishing the rising need to settle inside of me. I could handle it.
Letting my head rest against the back of the seat, I turned my gaze out the window. There was nothing to see, which wasn’t helping to distract my mind from the tightness down below.
I wanted to cry. I wanted to touch. And…I just wanted things I knew I couldn’t do.
Tonight was going to suck. Whatever this man did to me would be just icing on the cake.
Would I survive? Would I come out more broken than I was right now?
