I leaned against the door jam, watching Oakley. Or maybe it was more like staring at the boy. He was sitting on the floor, one hand reaching out towards the stuffed animal that sat on the bed.
I was surprised he hadn’t tried to take it yet. As far as I could tell, he hadn’t once taken it off the bed the past few days. Even though I knew Oakley came in here a number of times and mostly did what he was currently doing right now.
His fingers rubbed against one paw of the stuffed animal. His head lay on that arm, hair falling along the side of the bed.
It was moments like that that I wished I could read his thoughts.
“Hey, little one.”
At my voice, Oakley jerked, tearing his hand away from the stuffed animal and shuffling quickly into a folded mess of limbs. His eyes were wide, and the sucking on his thumb intensified.
His thumb was still bruised around the base from his teeth marks, and I had hoped he’d take to a pacifier when I wasn’t around, but no luck.
“I didn’t mean to startle you.” I raised both hands before letting them down slowly. I gave him a moment to settle before walking closer.
Oakley barely breathed as I neared him. Did he think he was in trouble?
The whole point of this room was for him if he wanted the things in it. Oakley needed a space he could go to, even if I hadn’t explained any of that yet, which was my fault.
How would he possibly know the things in this room were for him to find comfort in if I hadn’t told him so? The boy hadn’t done much of anything without permission, except for when he asked to refix the bookshelf. Or the times he’s cleaned and did the laundry.
But even then, he didn’t do more than he knew he was allowed to do.
At the bed, I took the bunny before sitting on the side.
“I think this little guy needs a friend,” I mused, turning it to face Oakley in my gasp. “Whadda you think?”
Oakley’s eyes bounced from my face to the toy, to somewhere around the room. Over and over for a few seconds, like he wasn’t sure if it was okay to take, to touch, or to even want the stuffed animal.
“You can take it,” I held it out closer to Oakley, who slowly grabbed it. Once the bunny was in his hold, he quickly held it against his neck, as though he feared I was going to take it from him.
What sort of games did Donny play on this poor boy?
“Everything in this room can be touched, taken, or played with. If you want to look through the drawers, you are free to do so. If you want to curl up on this bed and take a nap, you can. Or you are even welcome to sleep in this room at night if you wish to.”
Oakley’s eyes lifted to mine, and questions that wouldn’t be spoken raced through his head.
“This room is yours now, little one. Your safe place if you want to call it that. Nothing bad is to happen in this room. This room is all yours.”
Although, it probably wasn’t smart to keep some of the stuff in the dresser that was still there. But I highly doubted Oakley would venture through them more than a simple glance.
This boy was more interested in the stack of books in my bedroom. He sure took his time fixing them.
“Did you eat lunch today?”
Oakley slowly shook his head, backing away from me a bit more. Not that he had anywhere to go, he was already pressed against the side of the bed, stuck on the footboard to his back.
“You really need to eat more food,” I sighed, not surprised by his answer. At least he ate breakfast and dinner, and I knew it would take him a while to get to the small fact that he could eat when he was hungry. Years of having almost all of his needs controlled like he had, would take time and patience on my end.
“Let us get some dinner then.” I stood, holding my hand out for him to take. All he did was push back against the bed more, and I grimaced in pain for him.
I had thought we’d made a bit of progress the last few days.
I gave him a sad smile, stepping back a bit. Only then did he stand, keeping a tight hold on the stuffed animal and thumb in his mouth.
“If you need to use the bathroom, go ahead. I’ll go start dinner.”
As I left the room, I heard Oakley’s feet quickly walk the other way towards the bathroom. Knowinghe’d make his way down to the kitchen, I headed that way myself.
