The truck I’d been forced inside shortly after my retrieval passed over another hard bump in the road causing even more tears to spill from my already exhausted eyes. I sniffled, unsure what was happening.
Well, that wasn’t entirely true. I had a pretty good inkling of what to expect. I just didn’t want it to be true. I refused to allow myself to believe it so. ‘I am a human being. Why on earth would I be sold to another human being?’
Before I could think of any sort of answer, regardless of how little it made sense, the truck came to a rough stop. Unprepared for the abrupt halt, I ended up rolling face-first off the seat I had been instructed to lie down on. Normally, I would have picked myself up off the floorboard, but not today. I knew better than to draw more attention to myself than I already had by simply existing. No, I needed to appear weak. Which wasn’t hard to do when it was the truth.
I listened carefully as the familiar sound of the driver’s side door opening filled the small space, shutting just as quickly. Mere seconds passed before the door in the back opened, a rush of cool air kissing my bare skin. My pants and shirt had long since been shredded into pieces–mostly to stop my cellmate’s bleeding that one time–and I was left in nothing more than a pair of the filthiest underwear known to man.
A shiver wracked my entire body as I was picked up and tossed over the man’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Logically, I knew I probably should have fought, despite not having the energy to do so. But the truth was, I no longer saw the point. It wasn’t like I’d ever find a way out of this. I had accepted my fate the first time those three words had been spoken.
“Take me instead.”
I would die and I’d do so willingly.
My body swayed from side to side as I was carried into what I could only assume was another building. After several minutes, the man came to a stop and quickly righted my body. Using his hands, he directed me into a sitting position on what I could only assume was a toilet, the cold porcelain kissing my abused flesh. The bag was then slipped from my head with more care than I expected.
I blinked, stars dancing in my tear-soaked eyes. Allowing them a moment to adjust to the harsh lighting, the sterile white of my surroundings soon came into focus. The walls, shower, sink, towels–everything was stark white. Well, almost everything.
The man that now owned me was the only contrast in the small space, his perfectly black suit standing out against the rest of the room’s contents.
All the while, the tears continued to fall.
“Hush, boy. It’s all gonna be okay.” One of his wrinkled hands rested on the top of my head as if I were a dog.
‘How could it possibly be okay? None of this was okay.’ Tears continued to spill down my cheeks. ‘I just want Zeek. I want to go home. I want––’
“Shower time,” the man’s words cut through my mental haze. “A nice warm one for my baby boy.”
I sat there in silence while the man turned on the water in the shower. Almost instantly, the heat rushed around me, enveloping me in a false sense of comfort. Once he’d deemed the temperature was perfect, he picked me up from where I sat on the toilet and placed me into the shower. I froze, unable to do anything more than breathe.
When I still didn’t move, he sighed, washing me from head to toe. Even between the legs. His touch did nothing for me because I was already numb, waiting to die. Though, oddly, he didn’t seem to care that he hadn’t elicited that type of reaction out of me.
For the time being.
When he’d deemed me clean enough, I was ushered out of the shower and a clean towel was wrapped around my tiny frame. With a tight hand wrapped around the back of my neck, I was steered into a nearby bedroom.
Eyes tilted down, I refused to look at the man who now held my life in his hands.
Doing as instructed without a fight, I vaguely remember being forced to dress in cotton pants and a matching shirt just before being tucked into bed like a baby. Tears continued to fall freely, soaking the pillow beneath my head. I didn’t really sleep that night, but I wasn’t awake either. My heart was too broken, shattered into a million pieces.
I was nothing and I had no one. My thoughts weren’t even there to comfort me.
It wasn’t until hours later, when the sun had risen back into the sky that I was finally forced to face the man who now owned me. Grabbing me by my chin, he forced me to meet his eyes. His eyes were warm, inviting even. It was a stark contrast to his twisted mouth and white hair.
“Do as I say and it won’t be bad here, boy.” I nodded, my voice having vacated. “You’re already so broken.” His hand traced the side of my face as if I would break at any moment. “On your knees.”
I choked back even more tears before dropping to my knees in defeat. A rough hand immediately grasped the back of my head and pulled it into his groin. Thankfully, he was still dressed. And soft.
“I don’t want you for sexual reasons,” he muttered as he pulled my head back, forcing me to look up into his beady eyes. “But I do like to play. Be good, and I’ll reward you. Be bad, and you’ll pay the price.”
I nodded helplessly. Nothing he could do to me could possibly make my life any worse than it already was.
Ezekiel
Before I knew it an entire week had gone by and I’d spent every minute of it holed up at home, refusing to look at the picture of the kid or any of the other contents in the envelope. I didn’t talk to anyone, even ignoring phone calls and texts from my family. Luckily, they were used to me keeping my distance, so they left me be.
The only time I ventured out that entire week were the days I had to work. And I almost called in a number of those days.
I barely ate. Hardly slept. To be quite honest, it was a chore just to keep breathing.
