Chapter 6
Avidya
The next couple of days passed by with little talk between Jonas and myself. He tried, but I silently seethed. At him, at life – everything. I was in prison, even though someone, no idea who had sent clothes to the apartment I was being kept in. Along with a few books and movies to keep me entertained. At least I wouldn’t be bored to death.
I hadn’t tried to really read any of the books; my mind refused to let me drop all thoughts of the unknown. The man I wasgiftedto hadn’t been back and Jonas had hardly said anything about the man that held my life in his hands.
I explored the entire area, finding every nook and cranny. I found every little hiding place that I could squeeze into if need be. What else had I to do? There was no way I would just sit with the man that expected me to be the perfect little girl I was no longer. There was no way I could be after Shemoli took me, after killing my best friend.
Not wanting to stay in the room any longer on the fourth day, I finally decided to go sit outside on the patio that was attached to the bedroom. It was a nice warm day with a slight breeze. I left my hair down, as I had no reason to do anything with it. Mother always insisted that it had to be styled every day, and pulled off of my face in some sort of fashion. I hated it. I hated having to spend so much time on my appearance for no reason. I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup, yet I was expected to be presentable at all times, day or night.
So far, nothing like that was expected of me here. The clothes that were sent to me were named brand, but something I would maybe pick out on my own if I was given the chance to do so. Not having to worry about what I wore or being ‘put together’ was nice, refreshing even. Something I could certainly get used to, if I hadn’t already.
Without question, I knew I’d miss the clothing most if or when I ever got to return back to the home I grew up. There was nothing left there, though, so I wasn't entirely looking forward to that endeavor. Heck, I wasn’t looking forward to anything that would be happening in my near future.
Outside, I leaned against the metal railing that went up just above my waist. Looking out over the land, there was a few houses and busy roads, but beyond that were fields and land for miles. I had to gather we were on the edge of downtown, a part of the town I never ventured to explore.
Growing up in a middle-class community, seeing just miles of land was not something I got to see other than the few times my parents and I traveled across the country for church reasons. Where we lived was a better than the trailer park communities with perfect green lawns. Safe, I guess, compared to what I had witnessed the last few days.
I knew for a fact that dad didn’t make that much money and mom wasn’t allowed to work. I wouldn’t be allowed to work, either. I never questioned how we had a pretty decent house. Name brand things here and there, but still more than what income father always claimed to make.
As I bided my time for who knows what, I complimented what I should do now. I knew I needed to escape, sure it would be the only way to not be held as a prisoner. The timing would have to be perfect for me to attempt it.
“Planning on jumping?” Zachariah asked, his voice quiet, but yet there was something else there that I couldn’t name.
Shrieking, I turned around, hand over my racing heart, coming face to face with the man I had been given to. The man that held my life in his hands.
“Does everyone sneak up on unexpectant girls?” I breathed out, refusing to meet his eyes. I glared at his firm chest where his arms were crossed.
“Well . . . are you?” he asked after a moment, tilting his head to the side slightly and ignoring my question.
“Am I what?” I asked once my heart was back to its normal rhythm. Somewhat. For some reason, just his presence made my body feel different, or at least what I was used to. I was jittery. Not afraid, per se, but it felt that way.
“Jumping?” he repeated, sounding almost irritated.
“No,” I squinted. I hadn’t thought of that since I wasn’t up for dying. Not yet, at least. I thought about explaining why I was out here but did it really matter?
“Good,” he said, sounding relieved. “How about we head inside. I brought food.”
“I’m not hungry,” I spoke, trying to hide the bitterness I felt.
“Suit yourself,” he said, yet he didn’t leave. It felt like he didn’t want to leave me alone now that he may have planted the idea of anoutfor me. I heard him move to take a seat in one of the tan patio chairs, but I tried to ignore him. I always hated thick silences, and I wasn’t known to keep my mouth shut when times called for it.
Flinging my body around to face the man, forgetting that he was sitting, my train of thought was lost. I couldn’t deny that he looked . . . smoking hot. Sun-kissed skin, dark brown eyes, and a hard look to his eyes. It all drew me in, and God, did I wish he didn’t.
His dark colored button up shirt with the top three buttons left undone was paired with a pair of dark washed jeans that fit him perfectly. He sat there, arms resting on the arms of the chair as if he was completely at home in this space.
How the heck was he so dang comfortable about this? There was no possible way unless kidnapping young girls was an everyday thing to him.
He smirked, making my stomach fill with butterflies as he caught me ogling him. How did he have so much control over me? It couldn’t be possible; we were strangers to one another, for crying out loud!
Shaking my lust filled thoughts away, knowing there was no place for them, I tore my eyes away, preferring to glare at the floor. I wished it would open up and burn me whole.
I had thought I was prepared for his return, whenever that would be. Now as we were in the same room, one on one, I was at a loss on how to react. I had all these things I wanted to yell at him, but now those words were lost among so much else.
“What do you want with me?” I asked after a few minutes, my voice coming out smaller than I had planned.
“Depends,” he drawled out slowly. “What can you do?”
