Avery’s mouth fell open. Neither anger nor jealousy suited anyone, even him.
“Wait, are you mad because he gave a huge donation? That had nothing to do with me. Your camp motivated him.” Avery leaned a hip against the counter beside him. “You know Paulson has a personal history of loss, right? His mom left him and his father when he was ten. She’s alive, but she’s in something that sounds like a cult. He’s tried, but they’ve never reconnected.”
“That’s not the same thing.” Miles glared at her, his darkened chestnut eyes narrowing.
“It’s a loss, Miles. His mom chose not to love him. That’s painful.”
“You spent most of the night dancing with him.” He shook his head.
“Because you left me all alone. I tried to locate you so many times, I gave up. It felt like you didn’t care where I was. I couldn’t find anyone I knew except for him. All Paulson and I did was dance. We made the best of a room where we knew almost no one. He never so much as touched me. He’s wanted to meet Victoria for a while and once I introduced them, I left them to chat and looked for you. Again!”
Miles massaged his jaw. “You know how I feel about him. And you danced for the entire set. You left me.”
Avery removed the bracelets from her wrist and stacked them on the counter. She knew he wasn’t jealous of Paulson. His behavior was about something bigger. Maybe she’d told him she loved him at the wrong time, but she would not let him talk to her this way.
“The dance floor wasn’t full. Why didn’tyoucome over and ask me to dance? Or ask me to go get a drink? Or any of the million other things you could have asked me? All I wanted was to be with you. I would havedone whatever you suggested. I actively looked for you. Forgive me if I didn’t want to stand at the edge of the party like a jilted wallflower.”
For a long minute, Miles said nothing. A hurt rose within her. Trent had iced her out at parties too. Avery had initially assumed his habit of flirting his way through a room was part of his charm. Later, she learned it was part of his game. Miles wasn’t the type to enchant women for the sake of his own ego, but he’d left her out in the cold.
“I don’t like feeling jilted, Miles,” she said. “I was alone in a sea of beautiful people who didn’t seem to know I existed. The last thing I wanted to do was bother you with my insecurities. You had enough going on.”
Miles opened the fridge and poured himself a glass of chocolate milk without asking if she wanted anything. She let him gather his thoughts in hopes he might gain some perspective.
“I had a full plate,” he said, screwing the cap back on the milk bottle. “It was a lot of pressure, raising money while making sure everyone had fun. I’m not used to that.”
“You go to parties, premieres, and galas all the time.” Avery placed a hand on her hip, right where he had touched her earlier in the night, back when he couldn’t wait to dishevel her. His wish had been granted. Things between them were rapidly disheveling now.
“Those are different. I’m not an interesting person, I just know interesting people,” he said. “It’s nevermyparty. I’m always a guest.”
“Then you should know how I felt,” she said, trying to keep herself calm despite the growing storm inside her. He had to understand the humiliation of not belonging somewhere.
He stood quietly and drank half his milk.
“I wanted you next to me,” he said, peering into the glass. “Even though we were in the same room, it hurt that you were somewhere else. Did you hear my speech?”
“Of course I heard it. Your speech was brilliant and moving. Somany people around me teared up,” Avery said. “And I kept moving to where I saw you and when I got there, you were gone. At some point, I felt iced out.”
Miles began to pace. “What is happening? When did we start moving so fast? We were fine this morning, and now we’re…”
He ran his hand down his face, shook his head, and stared at the floor.
Avery needed him to finish the sentence, but he didn’t. So she filled in the blank for herself.
Now, we’re … having our first fight. Okay, maybe our second.
She gripped the edge of the counter as a giant bubble of hurt expanded through her chest. One fight shouldn’t be enough to establish a pattern, but both their fights had started with her saying she loved him.
And him saying nothing.
She knew the pattern. Miles was, after all, a runner.
Avery didn’t like city Miles. She loved the boy in the Boathouse who pointed out constellations to her. SayingI love youhadn’t protected them from the cold, hard truth. Once again, Victoria was correct. Avery and Miles wouldneverwork outside the lake.
That summer, she had said nothing as they stood in the parking lot. He hadn’t given her any choice other than to accept his decree and watch as he drove off. This time, Avery was going to say her piece.
“Maybe things started moving fast when we were locked in the Boathouse that night, and you said it had always been me.” She swallowed the growing lump in her throat. “Or maybe it was when you told me you didn’t need to look at the heavens because I was the only star in your sky. I’m beginning to think you only mean those things at the lake. All I know is tonight, I wasn’t in your sky. I was in your way.”
“I never said that,” he said.
