“I’m putting a hard rule into place, Shiv. If youdon’tlike something, you are required to tell me. Understand?”
“I don’t like that rule. If you like it?—”
“I didn’t say we’d stop if you don’t like it, depending on what it is. It means we’re going to have a discussion to see where it lies on your scale of likes and dislikes. I know that you’ll do thingsyou don’t like to please me, and I’m going to let you. But if it’s something that you truly hate and take zero enjoyment out of, we need to talk about it. If you disobey this rule, therewillbe consequences. Am I clear?”
Jesus, when he talks like that, it sends shivers of excitement through me. “Yes.”
“Good. Now back to sex. We’re good on the toys for now. Self-pleasure comes to mind next. You are not to get off on your own. Ever. Understand? Your orgasms are mine alone. Mine to give you. Mine to command from you.”
Yep, more heat surges through me. “Okay.”
“Good. Lastly for now, I want to see you just like this when you’re expecting me. Naked and on your knees with your hands behind your back.”
He’s just trying to turn me on now. I nod. “Yes.”
Dasan pulls his shirt over his head. “We have a couple other things I want to talk about, such as when you need to suck for self-soothing. The line between part-time and full-time, for instance. But I think we need a talk break. What do you think?”
I nod wildly. “Yes!”
He chuckles. “Get over here and pull my dick out, Shiv. It’s time for you to show me what your hands can do too.”
CHAPTER 9
DASAN
Shively is notconfident with his hands on me. That’s very clear. It’s been four days since our conversation, and we’ve talked a lot since. For instance, he has to check in with me four times throughout the day to tell me how he’s feeling until told otherwise.
This is because I know how nervous he is with hockey starting—he can’t have distractions when he’s coaching—and I need to make sure his mental health remains good. Not only for our relationship but for his wellbeing.
We also went over some honorifics, but I have to say, I’m not a fan of any of them. I don’t like sir or master or daddy or any of the other common ones. I also don’t like slave, baby, boy, or whatever for Shively. It’s a work in progress. For now, we’re sticking with our names, though I’m quickly realizing I’m not happy with those either.
I’ve been reading more about our situation, and there are things I haven’t thought of before such as other acts of service outside the bedroom. That falls into the part-time versus full-time D/s relationship, and that’s a bigger discussion entirely.
I dish myself some three sisters soup and grab a wedge of cornbread then head for my desk. This is my game-day ritualthat I’ve practiced for every single home game for as long as I can remember.
It’s time to relax with some dirty fanfiction while I eat and calm my mind. Recently, I’ve been obsessed with Howl and Sophie fanfiction because there needs to be some heat in that damn book! Andyou knowSophie is probably a kinky mofo, so she’d enjoy taking Howl in his wizard beasty form. Let’s be real here, we’dalltake Howl in whatever state he comes in.
However, as I stare at my screen and absently chew my bite of soup, I’m not feeling Howl and Sophie goodness today. I once read a fanfic of Howl, Sophie, and Calcifer, and I’m kind of down for that threesome. However, no matter how hard I try, I can’t write my own threesomes including Calcifer. My heart isn’t polyamorous at its core, so while I enjoy reading it, I can’t seem to write it.
I close out of that story and scroll the rest of my unfinished stories online. I have a decent following, and they enjoy when hockey season begins again because it means they get more chapters. I haven’t yet seen someone put the two together, though—hockey season and my writing output. I keep waiting for someone to point out the coincidence.
I have a few ancient cultural stories going too. I use evidence from history of cases where they were “just really good friends and roommates but sadly never married” and expand on that. I have one going for Alexander the Great and his “close friend,” Hephaestion. It’s hilarious that there are so many naïve and stupid people who think that homosexuality is anewthing. Like, dude, open your eyes.
There’s also my reimaginings of the ancient gods—Isis and Osiris. Yes, taboo for the win. Again, get over it, close-minded prudes. Go live your perfect life and keep your judgment to yourselves. Yes, those are my responses when I get some holier-than-thou comments on my taboo stories.. As if I’m making up taboo gods for funsies.
I also have an Apollo serial about sexy exploits with his various lovers from mythology. I give the paragraphs that mention his sexcapades far more detail. It’s more fun that way. I also like that he swung all ways. Apollo wasn’t afraid of fucking any gender. He simply enjoyed people.
As it should be.
While I sip on my soup, I realize that my writing preference is kind of all over the place, but that makes me smile. Up until recently, I thought my bisexuality was maybe simply in passing, something that was mine that I would never truly act on. Acknowledging men are hot isn’t difficult. Theyarehot. And let’s not even get started on dicks. They’re by far the hottest part of the human body!
Besides some past experimentation, I never saw myself in a relationship with a male, but my writing preferences are all over the place. It isn’t just male and female. There are also male and male, female and female—I love writing me some Katara and Mei fics—and every other pairing too.
I enjoy fanfiction because I don’t need to create a world or characters. They’re already created for me, and I enjoy having those rules and boundaries in place. All I have to do is give them my own storyline. You justknowsome of our favorite PG characters are freaky as fuck.
But what do I want to write today?
Finishing my soup, I use my cornbread to soak up all the broth remnants. I love my cornbread. There are actual chunks of corn in it. It’s not just a dry mix from a box. There’s also a touch of honey because I like it sweeter rather than grittier.
