He sighs. “I don’t even know where to begin. How do I make this happen? I want it so bad.”
“I think you need to begin by pricing the cost of the exact boat you want and saving up. It’s going to take a while since I imagine boats are expensive.”
“So expensive.”
“In the time it takes you to save up, you have plenty of time to figure out how to make it happen. How to propose it to the Calloways and how to get it in the excursion books. In this one instance, it’s not bad that it’ll take some time. That means you have time to get it right.”
“It’s kind of scary,” he admits. “The idea I’d be doing this all alone.”
“Is that your passive-aggressive way of convincing me to do this with you?”
He grins. “Yes!”
I roll my eyes.
“No. It’s not. I’m just saying that I’m a little scared of the idea of doing this all alone. But at the same time, I don’t want a partner who might want to change my ideas. Not saying they’re all good ideas, and maybe I need someone to talk me off the ledge, but I also don’t want someone to tell me it’s all wrong and try to take over. And then there’s knowing that everything is on me. Me! It’s a little terrifying.”
I grip his hand. “Don’t let your fear hold you back. If this is your dream and you’re passionate about it, Cash, then do it! Maybe I won’t be your partner, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be by your side every step of the way.”
He smiles. “Thanks, Lie.” His shoulders relax. “That makes me feel better.” His phone gives off this loud, obnoxious sound that feels like nails down your spine.
“What the fuck is that?” I say as he rolls away.
Laughing, he makes it stop. “My alarm. It needs to be the worst sound in the world, or I won’t get up. This is the second worst sound in the world.”
“What’s the first?”
“Benson.”
I laugh and watch as he gets out of bed. “Going to work, huh?”
He nods. “Yep. You can stay here. I only have three tours today, so I’ll be back in a few hours.”
“Cool. I have some crochet cocks to finish, anyway.”
Chapter Twenty
LAIKEN
June
I’ve never feltthe tightness in my chest over someone that I do right now. I close my eyes, digging my fingers into the dirt, feeling the way the earth beneath my hands gives way.
“Laiken?”
Sitting back on my haunches, I look up at Kellan. “Hey.”
His eyebrows are knitted together. “Are you okay?”
“That obvious, huh?”
He crouches on the ground beside me. “You seem to come here when you need to think. But today, you look like your pet died.”
I sigh. “Sorry. Just… thinking.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Yes, but I can’t.”
