“Not me. I’ll figure it out. Besides, this is your career, and it’s important to you, right?” Julian nods. “You really love the sport, not just playing it, right?” He nods again. “Then Ishouldtake an interest in it. That’s what partners do.”
“It’s equally okay if you legitimately don’t like hockey, you know. We aren’t required to have the same interests and passions. Contrary to what so many people are led to believe, we’re allowed to be our own people with our own likes and dislikes.”
I smile. “I know.”
“Good.” Julian rests his head on mine. “Now… for your other question—how two supposed straight boys fell in love and became couple goals. It’s sickeningly sweet, so I hope you have a vomit bag ready.”
I laugh as Julian settles back on top of me, pressing his face into my neck. I hug him tightly and listen to him talk, still feeling childish and maybe ridiculous, but also like a boulder was lifted from my shoulders because we had a conversation about how I was feeling.
Maybe the next time something bothers me, I can remember this feeling right now. I can remember that Julian likely doesn’t mean to make me feel unimportant to him. He did say I was the most important person in his life right now.
“It began as a joke,” Julian says, and I settle in for story time.
CHAPTER 27
JULIAN
I standup from tying my shoes and Arush is there with our bottles of water and a smile that makes my heart skip. I’m not sure what it is about him. He’s incredibly unlike the guys in my past that I crushed on and yet, this is an entirely different kind of crush.
I’d go so far as to say it’s more than a crush. I can’t believe I’d spent so many years without him at this point. It seems so unfathomable. The ease with which he fits into my life, as if he’s always been there, leaves me staring. There’s always been an Arush-shaped absence in my life.
I woke up this morning wishing we could go back to the airport and live that day over again, but this time, do it right. He should have seen my smile. My happiness. My relief that he had finally come home to me.
Instead, he found a misguided, confused man, lost in a dream he hadn’t completely thought through. I shudder to think what would have happened if literally anyone else had gotten off the plane and stood before me.
They would have been wrong. They wouldn’t have been Arush.
“Ready?” Arush asks.
I take his forearms, sliding my hand down his soft skin until my fingers find their place between his. “Yes. Let’s go get sweaty.”
He flashes me a smile.
Our innuendoes, though lame at best, are extra amusing because we know we don’t mean it in the way we’re saying it. It’s a mocking innuendo or something. We dirty tease and then laugh at ourselves because we aren’t the least bit interested in getting sexy.
The relief in that knowledge is incredible. I think it has allowed me to become comfortable with him far sooner than I would have with anyone else. I’m not waiting for the conversation that they changed their mind and want sex.
“But you’re so sexy. Can’t I just suck you a little? I promise you’ll like it.”
I push the memory away and kiss Arush’s cheek before pulling open the door. Our hands are linked until we get to the elevator where Ellie and Paul are just stepping out with their hands full. We unburden their loads, earning ourselves amused but pleased smiles.
“Where are you headed so early?” Ellie asks as she leads the way down the hall to her door.
“To the gym,” I answer. “Nowhere exciting.”
“Oh. We haven’t gone to the gym in ages, Paul,” Ellie says. “We should join them.”
“You don’t want two old fuddy-duddies joining you,” Paul says to me.
Arush is already grinning, nodding at the question I didn’t have to ask.
“We’d love for you to join us,” I assure them. “We love your company.”
“You two are such good boys. Just put those on the counter and we’ll meet you downstairs as soon as we put away our perishables,” Ellie says.
Arush and I place the bags on the counter and tell them we’ll see them in a few minutes as we leave their condo again. In the quiet hall, I take Arush’s hand again.
“You have the best floor in the building,” Arush says.
