The longer I look at him, the more I wonder if I’ve truly been blind to what was right in front of me for a year and a half. If one of us had been traded and forced to split up, would I have realized I was in love with him then, when it was too late to do anything about it? Something inside me tells me I would have.
And I think it would have remained too late. I doubt I’d have had the courage to tell him. I’m not sure why, but I think he wouldn’t have said anything either. We’d have been so close to this perfect forever, and it would have slipped us by because we were so focused on being… friends.
I hate that this is the world we live in. Default is to fall in love with someone of a different sex, so when you find your soulmate in the same sex, you don’t always see it for what it is.
Unless you happen to be walking down the streets in Vegas and witness a newly married drunk couple and make a joke that the other person takes seriously. Fate was watching over us, giving us the nudge we needed.
Now I get to spend every single day until my very last breath with this man. Ohh… I need to remember that line. It’s totally going in my vows.
Smirking, I get out of bed as carefully as I can so I don’t disturb Etna and head for the bathroom. The douche is still sitting in the shower right where I left it, as is the box on the counter. I read the instructions one more time before stepping back into the shower.
“This is going to be awkward,” I mutter.
Sure enough, it’s both awkward and gross. I nearly gag and decide to look at the ceiling, so I don’t have to see the dirty water. I’m so disturbed by it I don’t even recognize how strange thefeeling is right away. And then I swear, the spray is hitting my nerve endings in such a way that I feel it tingle throughout my body.
I once had my ears flushed, and it reminds me of that feeling. It’s a centralizedflushing, but you feel that echo all over.
By the time the water runs clear, I feel absolutely disgusting. I wash much more thoroughly than I probably need to and take comfort in the fact it only took, like, six minutes. I’d already been shifting us to a diet that facilitates bottoming. Or something. From what I understand, this washing isn’t necessary—or recommended—often. Once a week. Maybe twice. But you can do so less often when your diet supports your sex life.
Stepping out of the shower, I take great comfort in knowing that.
When I’m dry, I head back into the bedroom. Etna is still sound asleep, which I’m not entirely surprised about. It’s only been a couple hours since we got home and he’d been up for more than twenty-four. There’s a chance he’ll sleep all day.
Maybe that’s not a good thing, though. We don’t want his sleep schedule messed up.
I climb on the bed and sit beside him, resting my hand on his chest over his ribs. His skin is smooth, but I can feel the stubble. I guess I didn’t realize he shaved. I’ve never seen him shave his chest. Then again, we only recently started showering together, and not every time.
I wonder what he’d look like with some hair. Would I like it? Would I find it attractive? My eyes graze over his torso as I imagine a light layer of hair. A sexy little trail going down his stomach. Yeah… I think I could get on board with that.
My eyes follow his chest up, looking at every curve and detail until I get to his face, where I find his eyes slitted open as he watches me. When my eyes meet his, a smile appears, slow and tired. My cheeks flush.
“Sorry. I probably shouldn’t touch you in your sleep.”
He huffs quietly. “You can touch me whenever you want, Keno.”
“Yeah?”
Etna nods. “Yeah. Including when I sleep.”
“Anywhere?” I ask, trailing my hand down the imagined happy trail until I get to the edge of the blanket.
“Anywhere,” he confirms.
Adjusting myself so I can lean over him, I kiss him. Slow and intimately. I can feel how tired he is, even as his arms come up to pull me closer.
“Ready to fool around?” Etnas asks.
“You don’t want to sleep more?”
“I can sleep after. A good orgasm is the best way to sleep.”
I grin. He’s not wrong. “So, I douched, and I have thoughts about it, but I don’t think they’re very appetizing right before sexy time, so we’re going to save those for later.”
Etna laughs. “Noted.”
“How about I suck your balls, and you finger my hole? We can swap off later. Once you’ve had another nap and get to enjoy the experience of cleaning your hole.”
He laughs again. “Okay.”
