He was extra shy in the morning. Probably because he’d been hard all night and woke up hard, too. But I didn’t call attention to it. He was mortified enough, and I really don’t mind. I mean, I wake up hard every morning. Maybe guys grow out of that, but I haven’t, yet. So I was hard too, which I think only amped up Torin’s horror.
Outside of that though—actually, even with that—I loved everything about this morning. I loved taking turns showering. It had been on the tip of my tongue to invite him into the shower with me. I have two shower heads and a rain head in the middle. Usually, I have them all on and the shower is enormous. It’s no different than communal showers in the locker room.
Winny’s words that I often play as a chant in my head stopped me.Think before you speak.It would make Torin uncomfortable. Probably. When I showed him my 3D dick and offered for him to make something—not meaning a dick, but I definitely understood why he heard that because it’s what I practically said to him!—I’d sent him into a panic attack.
Torin’s shy. He has anxiety around people, so I’m very aware of that and try not to add to it. I want to be the one to ease it for him. I imagine it must be exhausting and he probably needs a break.
We didn’t ride here together, though. I wasn’t sure if he’d want to go home after and I didn’t want him to feel trapped with me. But we spent the morning together making breakfast and watching TV. Talking about the girl I’d been texting and about hockey. Then we had lunch together and hung out in the backyard. It was a nice day, so we enjoyed some fresh air before I had to head to the arena for pregame warmup. I offered to let Torin stay at my house until he had to be at the arena, but he chose to go in then, too.
I find him by the box with his hands on the glass. There’s a little boy with him, also with his hands on the glass. Surry the Seal wiggles and looks down at the boy. I’m rather impressed at the way he’s able to get his emotions across. I can practically feel his excitement, even if it’s fake and just for the boy.
Skating toward them, I stop at the boards and hit the glass right at Surry’s hand. He pulls it away and pretends to look at it in awe. The little boy’s eyes are wide, his mouth open in an O. Surry turns his hand toward the boy and motions for the boy to high five him. He does and even I know he just transferred my high five to the boy.
The kid runs off and Torin-as-Surry looks at me. I wink and nod toward the chute. “See you in a bit?”
He nods, so I turn away. I’m not sure if he actually heard me, but I imagine he understood well enough.
There’s a lot of chatter in the locker room when I join them and drop to the bench. I need to stretch. I’m feeling a little stiff. Pulling at my jersey and top pads, I work my way out of them. When I’m free, Atty is standing over me in a towel.
“You coming out with us to celebrate tonight?” he asks.
I’m torn. I really don’t want to go without Torin, but I lovecelebrating with my friends. Torin won’t want to go, there will be far too many people. That would probably be a very uncomfortable place for him.
“Been a while since you’ve been out with us,” Atty comments.
He’s right so I nod. “Yeah. I’m coming.”
“Cool. We’re heading to PJ’s—the usual.”
I nod again. “Kay. I’ll be there once I’m clean.”
Atty grins and turns to his cubby. I methodically get out of my gear and grab a towel on my way to the shower. Under the hot water, I do the first thing I do every time—scrub my hands with body wash. Hockey hands are gross.
While I’m scrubbing, I stand under the shower and let the water run over me. The heat of it and the pressure soothes my aching muscles. Maybe I’m getting too old for this. I’m not thirty, though, and I’m still doing really well, I think. I must be, right? L.A. has kept my contract for a few years now. I don’t have a huge goal tally, but I block a lot of goal attempts, which is actually my job.
Once my hands are probably clean, I rinse them and bring them to my face. Okay, just a hint of stink left. By the time I get through washing my hair and the sweat from my body, my hands should be clean. I suds my hair next and then use the shower walls to stretch my back, twisting and bending.
When I get shampoo in my eye, that’s my cue to rinse and move on to washing my body. Once I rinse, I rub my hands over my face and yawn. Maybe Iamgetting old. There’s a part of me that just wants to go home and sleep.
Turning off the water, I wrap the towel around my waist and head for the locker room. It’s almost empty now. Just Winny is left as I sit on my bench again. I have a second towel here that I wipe my feet dry with and reach for my socks. Clean socks because I refuse to put socks back on my feet once they come off. Not even if I’d only worn them here. I’m weird like that.
Winny stands over me with his hands in his pockets. I smile. “You coming out tonight?” I nod. “You okay, Hugo?”
“Yes. Why?”
“I haven’t seen you much lately.”
“Oh.” I pause in pulling one of my socks up. “Guess I’ve been hanging at home.”
“Are you truly okay with me seeing Dana?”
My eyebrows knit together. “Yes. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“You haven’t been over since she moved in, and you used to come over quite a bit. Noah, Atty, and Egon say they haven’t seen you much either. You haven’t even been taking girls home.”
I think about it and he’s not wrong. The last girl, which was a while ago, I just took for ice cream and then dropped her off at home. I wasn’t feeling it. She was beautiful. The exact kind of girl that I usually prefer. But… I just wanted to go home alone.
And talk to the girl I don’t know in text. Maybe Torin too. Okay, definitely Torin too.
