I chew the inside of my lip as I stare at him. He looks a little scruffier than he did when we were in Florida almost three weeks ago. His hair is longer and wilder. There’s more growth on his face that’s definitely not shaped.
There’s something more rugged about his look right now. Less refined. He looks more… real. Natural. It’s sexier than he’d been, which is impressive, since I wouldn’t have thought that was possible.
“Hold on,” I say and get off my bed. I move to the door, double checking all the locks. I don’t know why I’m so concerned. I’m alone in my room and who cares if someone did come in while I was jerking off?
It’s just Lo watching. Just Lo. He’s definitely allowed to watch. He can look at me all he wants. The person you’re seeing is the only one with that kind of permission. You know, theoretically.
I turn off the light in the bathroom and turn the ones on around the bed, instead. Then I climb back on and readjust myself so he can see me in frame again.
“If I’m going to do this, you are too.”
“Caulder, you were going to see me get off without prompting. There’s no way I can watch you andnotget off.”
I roll my eyes.
“Touch your dick, babe. Let me see you jerk yourself.”
I’m not entirely hard, but I think that’s more about nerves than arousal. I keep my eyes trained on my screen as Lo adjusts himself and the screen so I can see what he’s doing. My man is fucking hard. Like… achingly so. Seeing him so turned on definitely encourages my cock to get invested in this.
“There you go,” Lo praises.
I’m not paying attention to what I’m doing. Every time I think about it, I become more self-conscious. Instead, I stare at Lo. His hand smoothing over his dick, dropping to grip his balls, his thumb swiping over his cockhead. Sexy as fuck.
“Touch your balls, Caulder. Those boys tell me you neglect them.”
I roll my eyes. “You’re ridiculous.”
But as I shift so I can take my balls in my other hand, I think maybe he’s right. Just a little pressure and chills of need race down my spine. Lo groans.
My gaze becomes transfixed on his hand moving down between his legs. I’m not sure when he got the bottle of lube, but I stare as he slicks up his hole and pushes a finger inside. My mouth parts.
This wasn’t something we did together. He fingered me. Definitely did that. But he didn’t touch himself and he didn’t ask me to. Would I have?
I lick my lips, listening to his moan. My eyes ping pong between his hand pumping his dick and his fingers—now two—stuck up his ass.
“You too,” he says. “Let me see you stretch that hole for me.”
“I didn’t bring lube.”
“Spit.”
Nervously, I bring a hand to my mouth and suck on a finger. It’s awkward when I reach between my legs. When the angle is too difficult, I try to reach from behind me, instead. I rub my hole and yeah, it’s definitely reminiscent of when Lo touched me, but I’m all too aware that it’smetouching me.
“This is really fucking awkward,” I mutter.
Lo smiles. “You don’t have a toy, do you?”
“No. Actually, I have this rubber sleeve thing that I jerk with sometimes.”
He sighs. “My sweet, pure virgin,” he murmurs, almost in awe.
My cheeks burn. He’s never teased me. Never given me a hard time. Never pushed or pressured or… made me feel stupid. When he talks about my virginity, it’s almost in awe. With reverence. It makes my chest warm.
“Do you?” I ask.
Lo laughs. “More than you’d like to know. Want to see?”
I’m surprised when I find myself nodding. “Yes.”
