I look down at her. I dated Keely throughout high school. I know she wants to rekindle things. When I asked her to come over a couple of days ago, I regretted it as soon as she got there. Instead of hooking up with her, I gave her a box of her things and sent her home. She tried to get into bed with me, and by the look on her face, I can tell she wants to again. She feels wrong now, and I can’t put my finger on why.
Something in me changed when my grandfather died. The reality of how short life can be, how fragile we all are, has settled over me like a weighted blanket.
Her laugh always annoyed me. Keely is a pretty face, a willing body … but nothing more.
If I ever did get married, I’d want her to be my best friend, like my grandparents were. Like Holden and Rosie are. And I know I’m not capable of a deeper love like that, especially not with Keely.
I’m meant to be alone, and I’ve finally accepted it. I’ve sworn off relationships that last longer than one night. I feel like shit for leading her on, so I’m not doing it anymore. I didn’t even realize that was what I had been doing until she told me she loved me and wanted to get married, and I couldn’t say it back. I’ve never felt love for anyone besides my dead family—and maybe Duke’s dumb ass. Maybe I’m just not capable of it.
“It’s not gonna happen, Keels.” I grip her wrist, pushing her away from me. “I’m sorry.”
She gapes at me, frozen in place. I turn away from her, walking back out to where my best friend is sipping on a beer. He hands me mine. The girls are each perched on one of his legs. The blond one moves over to me once I claim my barstool again. Her musky perfume reaches my nostrils when she leans back against me. It’s too strong, too … something. I don’t know what exactly, but she just smells wrong.
“You know what? I’m hungry. We should go to your place,” I tell Duke.
Damn. I don’t know why I said that.
He frowns. “Why don’t we just order something here?”
I lean back, feigning indifference. “I’m just bored. I don’t care where we eat.” The bourbon is controlling my mouth, and I need it to stop.
Duke looks at the girls. “You ladies want to take the party elsewhere?”
They both nod, smiling at each other.
“Sure,” the redhead says, kissing Duke’s jaw.
“Cool,” I say, standing up and pushing the blonde off my lap. “Who’s driving?”
“I was gonna call Holden or Dolly.”
My pulse rate spikes. I don’t want Dolly here right now. I’m still too drunk to control myself around her. I’ll end up staring—or worse, touch her like I did when she brought the cake over—and he’ll notice.
He pulls out his phone and taps the screen. I start to question my suggestion to go to Redford Ranch. After what happened at my place, Moonlight Ranch, I need time to recalibrate my indifference act toward his little sister. She’s an itch I want to scratch, nothing more. But, damn, I want to scratch it.
“You know what? You’re right; let’s just eat here.”
Duke shakes his head. “Nah, I wanna play pool, and the Bartletts are hogging the table.”
“We should just challenge them.”
He’s already pressing the phone to his ear. “Holden will play us. He never gets to have fun anymore.” He pinches the redhead’s side before speaking into the phone. “Hey. Yeah, can you come pick us up from Old Harry’s? Thanks.”
He hangs up. It’s on the tip of my tongue to ask who’s coming to get us, but I manage to resist. I don’t care if Dolly sees me with this random girl hanging on me. My friendship with Duke is more important than the inconvenient attraction I feel toward his little sister. I value my life too much to give in to that carnal desire. I pull the blonde closer to me, nuzzling her neck.
“Hmm, you smell good, baby. You ready to get out of here?”
5
DOLLY
Irub my eyes, still blurry from sleep. I pull my glasses on, wincing at the sunlight pouring through my window, and climb out of bed. The shorts and tank top I’m sleeping in have cute little bunnies on them. The only people who still stay in the big house are me, Pops, and Duke—when he’s home. It seems like he’s out at Sam’s or a girl’s house most nights.
I patter toward my bathroom, twisting the knob to open it. My glasses immediately fog up from the steam pouring out of the shower. A grumble boils up from my throat.
“Duke! Why are you using my bathroom?” I fold my arms over my chest. “I need to pee!”
The water cuts off. I roll my eyes, turning to leave. I hear the shower curtain scrape open.
