“I always thought that was a ridiculous agreement,” he says.
“And then there’s the fact that our families are close. It could be weird, if…” I leave the rest unsaid.
He looks at me for a moment and then smiles. “And what do you think?”
I freeze. WhatdoI think?
I can’t tell him what I think…that keeping it a secret puts a bubble around us where everything is private and heady and nothing can touch it. That I see the allure there, but it also makes me want to stand outside and yell,Mine. That I want to kiss him out on the street and never have to explain to my brother that we’re not a bad idea. That I’m afraid Camden is using Jackson as an excuse for not really being sure that I’m anything more than a good time. That I’m afraid I am more into him than he is into me. God, I hope we’re on the same page.
“I don’t know yet,” I say honestly. “I like him. A lot. But I don’t…know what we are.”
Everett’s eyes soften. “That’s fair.”
“Your family has been through a lot…Stella…your health…I don’t want to make anything harder. And I’m just not sure what I really mean to him…and I don’t want to push him to find out.”
He sets his cup down. “Secrets can be okay for a little bit, but you don’t deserve to be kept a secret for long. I’m surprised he wants to hide something that makes him smile the way he has been lately.”
I pause. “He’s been smiling?”
His mouth twitches, and he leans in conspiratorially. “I’ve caught him several times smiling at nothing.” He lifts his hands up likeThat settles it, which makes me laugh. “For what it’s worth, Stella would have had a fit about this being a secret. She would’ve been throwing a party. She liked to expose joy in the brightest light possible.”
“I miss her,” I say softly.
“So do I.” He nods as we exchange a look. “So do I.”
I hand him his sandwich. “Are you sure you don’t want a sweet treat too?”
“You know I do, but I’m trying to lay off some of the sweet treats right now.”
“Okay. Understood.”
“If you decide not to keep it a secret and Jackson has a problem with it, send him my way. I can give him a reality check about how short life is. You’ve gotta live your best one while you’re here.”
I nod. “Thank you. I’m going with it for now, but…I’m not sure how long.”
He sobers, studying me. “Understood,” he says, echoing me. “In that case, I will practice selective amnesia and pretend I didn’t hear any of that, unless you need me to say my piece.”
“Thanks, Everett.”
“Anytime.”
He eats his sandwich, and we talk about the latest updates on Windhaven until he’s ready to go.
“This has been fun,” he says when he gets up. “I hardly ever get you all to myself. It’s rather enlightening.” He winks. “I thinkI’ll have to time it out to happen again sometime…see what else I can discover.”
I laugh. “You’d be surprised at the things I hear inside these four walls.”
“Whew.” He shakes his head. “I’m scared to even ask. We don’t want to get these walls talking…”
He puts his coat on, and I go around the counter and hug him.
“You’ve always been so special to our family, Juju. Nothing will ever change that. Okay?”
I pull away and look up at him, nodding. “Okay. Thanks, Everett. Your family is so special to me too. That’s what makes this so scary and so wonderful…”
“It’s going to be okay. Trust me on this. Now that my boy has had the sense to let you in, he’s not going to let you go.”
I watch as he leaves the cafe, waving one more time before he opens the door, and the gust of cold comes wafting in.
