“I know, man. I know,” he said. “I deserved what I got.” Then he outstretched his hand to Chris, who hesitated for a moment while he decided what to do. Chris looked down at me one more time before speaking.
“I appreciate your apology, but what you did to Allie is unforgivable. I’m sorry, Grif. You defined our friendship when you made a choice to torment my girlfriend. I have to stand up for what’s right, this time,” he said. “I can’t look past this.”
“Okay. I understand. I’m so sorry,” Griffin replied, looking down at the ground.
“Let’s go, Allie,” Chris said, looking down at me.
Chris was finally fighting for me. He was choosing to do what was right, and he was making a choice to defend my actions in front of his peers. He was giving me a reason to trust him. As we made our way into the locker hall, heads turned, and he quickly shut them down.
“If anyone has something to say to Allie, you can say it to me,” he said, then he turned to me, and kissed me at my locker, before helping me load my backpack with my books for the day. Before I shut the door, Isabelle came walking over.
“Hi, Allie,” she said sheepishly. “I’m so sorry about your back, and now your scholarship. How will you ever forgive me? This is all my fault.”
“I don’t blame you, Isabelle,” I said, and even though she smiled, I wasn’t sure if she believed me. How could I blame her? It wasn’t her fault that I got on a horse with a mind of its own. I pulled her in for a hug. “Just be gentle with me, my whole body is screaming in pain. Is that why you’ve been keeping your distance from me?”
“Yes, I’ve felt so bad, I was so worried you were never going to talk to me again!”
“I’ve missed you, Is.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
As the morning slid by, I was relieved at the lack of my name on peoples lips. Instead, the talk had turned to my sister. People were spreading the news of what she had done to me. In a way, I was embarrassed to still be hearing about it, but I was also relieved that they were setting the story straight on my behalf. Screw Amy. I don’t think I saw her all day.
That afternoon, I made the choice to attend field hockey practice so I could see Coach DeLaney and let her know what had happened. When I walked into the locker room, she called me into her office.
“Hey, Allie, come on in and sit down,” she said as I walked in and shut the door behind me. She had the most uncomfortable plastic chairs, so I remained standing. She understood, given my condition. “Coach Avery called me,” she began, and I cut in to save her the speech.
“My mom already called her, so I know,” I said, more comfortable discussing the devastating news now that I had some time to process it.
“I am so sorry, Allie. I can’t imagine how this must be affecting you. I know how much the scholarship meant to you,” she said, her hand in a tight fist on the desk. I knew how disappointed she must be with me.
“I am heartbroken. Field hockey is my passion, but there’s nothing I can do about it, Coach. I just have to move forward and try to get accepted to other schools,” I said, trying to keep from crying.
“I understand if it’s too hard being here, but you know that you’re welcome to join us on the field for practice as we prepare for the playoffs. You’re still the captain,” she said. “Of course, I’ll leave the decision to you.”
“Thanks, Coach,” I said, then I stepped out of her office.
Outside, everyone in the locker room stopped and looked up at me with a sympathetic smile. It was obvious that none of them knew what to say. How could they? I wouldn’t have known what to say either if it had been any one of my teammates losing a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity like this. I made the decision in that moment that this would be my last practice. I couldn’t handle the looks of pity on their faces, so I went to my locker, got my stick, and tapped the top of the door frame for the last time as I stepped out onto the field. It was time to let go of my dream.
As the team made their way out behind me, I could hear my favorite echo of the tap-tap-tap. I turned, and the tears welled up in my eyes as they chanted my name until the last of my teammates and then Coach DeLaney came through the locker room doors. Just then, the soccer team ran by, and they all stopped to circle up around me and joined in. All of the girls brought the toes of their sticks in as they chanted my name louder, and the tears began to roll down my cheeks.
Chris came up behind me and put his arms around me, sliding his hands into the front pocket of his hoodie and squeezing me tight. Coach DeLaney nodded with approval from across the circle, then called for ‘sticks up,’ which meant one final chant before the circle broke. And just like that, my career was over before it even started. I turned to Chris to bury my head into his jersey as he wrapped his arms around me, and I quietly cried.
“I’ve got you,” he said.
“I know,” I said, as I tried to pull it together, even though I was completely shattered at the loss of my dream. “Go to practice. I’ll see you later.” Then he leaned down, kissed me, and went to catch up with the guys.
I went back to the locker room, collected everything out of my locker, and called my Mom to come pick me up at the gym. As soon as we got home, I dropped my things on the kitchen floor, sat down at the table, and put my head in my hands.
“What am I supposed to do, now, Mom?”
“All we can do is wait and see. You’ve done your best. It’s in the hands of the college admission gods now, dear,” she said, as she patted me on the back and I cried.
That evening I heard blood curdling screams coming from downstairs. I slowed my breathing to listen. Mom and Amy were yelling back and forth at each other. It was like nothing I had ever heard before. I crept to my door and cracked it open.
“MOM! How could they!” She yelled.
“Amy! You brought this on yourself!”
