“Let’s not be doing that tomorrow, Allie, go ahead and get that out of your system now, please,” said Coach DeLaney with a surprised look.
“Yes, Coach.”
The rest of the practice, I was a mess, but I wasn’t nervous about tomorrow. I was just totally off my game, and Coach noticed, so she pulled me aside.
“Allie, are you okay? You seem distracted. I want you to cut out of practice early today, go home, and get your head straight. Get a good night’s sleep because we need you tomorrow. Go grab a shower, see you tomorrow.” Then she held up her hand for a high five, which I returned, gave me a big smile, and I went to grab my bag by the bench and head for the locker room.
There were still forty-five minutes left of practice, and my Jeep was still in the shop. I knew that my Mom would probably be running errands, so I wouldn’t be able to reach her from Coach DeLaney’s office on the house phone, which meant I would be walking home today. Great. Maybe the walk would do me some good to clear my head.
After a shower, I changed back into my school clothes, threw my stick and cleats in my locker, put my backpack on, and headed up past the soccer field to start the long walk home. My plan was to make a beeline across the parking lot without Chris noticing me. I still wasn’t ready to face him, so I tried to time it while his team was at the other end of the field practicing penalty shots, which meant their backs would be turned to me. As soon as my feet were off the grass and onto the asphalt, I began weaving in and out of cars, hoping not to be spotted.
“Allie? Wait,” came a panting voice from behind me.
Damn. How had he spotted me? I stopped, then spun around and stood there staring at him.
“What’s going on? Are you okay? Why are you leaving practice?” he asked with the same worried eyes that watched me after my missed goal.
“No, not really, I just need to get home,” I said, my eyes glued to the ground.
He moved closer.
“Don’t you have to get back to practice?” I asked, as I looked back up at him, then took a step backwards to create space between us.
“Do you want me to get back to practice?” he asked, as he took another step closer to close the gap.
“Yeah, you probably should. I’m a mess, and we’ve got a big game tomorrow. Coach wants me to go home and get my head straight,” I said with the same expression of defeat that I felt when I fell to my knees after the missed goal.
“What’s wrong?” he said as he reached for my hand, but I pulled away.
“I’ll see you,” I said, as I exhaled, then turned around and quickly walked away.
I could hear him jog to catch back up with me, and he gently grabbed my arm from behind. I stopped but didn’t turn around.
“Oh, Allie, is that what this is about? I didn’t mean anything by that. I just didn’t know what else to say in front of my friends since you seem so worried about what other people think. I’m trying to follow your lead,” he said.
I slowly turned around again to face him, now squinting with the sun in my eyes. “I don’t know how to do this, Chris. I’m sorry. I need to go,” I said, then I turned back around and started the long walk home without looking back over my shoulder again.
Once I was alone out on Mooreland Road, I relaxed by counting the heavy stream of cars that rolled past me as they traveled to school to pick up students. The fall breeze felt good on my salty skin, and I tried not to think about the day or the missed goal. The walk home would take me over an hour, but I welcomed the time to calm my mind. As I approached the crossing at River Road, I heard a low rumble coming from behind me, and I glanced over my shoulder to see what it was.
“Hey, Superstar,” came Chris’s voice over the hum of his loud truck engine. “Please, at least let me give you a ride home, it’s a long walk and you need to rest your legs before your big game tomorrow. Hop in,” he said with a pleading tone.
There was a line of cars behind him, so I only had a few seconds to make up my mind.
“You’re holding up traffic, and I could use the walk to clear my head. I’ll see you later,” I said, and then I sprinted across the road at a momentary opening in the heavy traffic before he had time to reply.
I was almost near his street by the time he made it across the busy road because I could hear the low rumble growing closer again. As I passed his street, I wondered if he would turn or not. In anticipation, I grabbed the straps of my backpack and gripped them tightly as I kept walking, but the rumble grew louder. He hadn’t turned.
“Allie, hang on,” he said as he pulled up alongside me. “You’re killing me here. I left practice early because I couldn’t bear the thought of you being upset. I really didn’t mean to make you feel like I didn’t care. Can I at least drive you home since I have 45 minutes to burn before I’m supposed to be home, and I’d rather not explain to my mom why I’m not at practice?”
“Fine,” I said, as I crossed the road to climb in. I was tired and happy not to walk home, even if it meant an awkward ride.
“Hop in,” he said, as I stood there for a moment, realizing just how high his truck was lifted off the ground. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he definitely caught a glimpse up my corduroy skirt when I hiked my leg onto the raised chrome step bar.
“I’m surprised you didn’t get sent home today wearing that.”
“It’s not that short when I pull it down onto my hips,” I said curtly.
He shifted a little in his seat.
