‘No, you can’t, but you can make it your own,’ I said. ‘As soon as I came back here, I felt the same feeling that I felt years ago. It’s so peaceful and homely. And your mum made it like that and now you have too. The farm will never be exactly like it was because she’s not here but it can be just as special. And it is.’
‘Thanks, Daisy. I’m really worried about Dad. The doctor said he really should retire completely. But I know he thinks we need him still. And I worry he’s right.’ Willow sighed. ‘Will I really be able to keep the farm going long-term? Can I do it alone?’
‘Well, you’re not alone; you have Dylan, and I’ll stay for the rest of the summer.’
‘Dad’s partner, Taylor said she’d come by more often to make sure he’s taking care of himself so I can focus on the pick-your-own opening, but there feels like so much to juggle.’
‘Maybe you could think about bringing someone on full-time, to pick up some of the slack.’
Willow eyed me. ‘But that would take the farm out of the family! I don’t know. I need to make the pick-your-own season the best this year then think about what to do. Will you help me make sure Dad takes it easy for the rest of the summer? We can’t lose him.’
‘Of course. And we won’t, don’t worry,’ I told her firmly. I wasn’t going to let her turn into me, worrying about losing people instead of living.
‘It’s not just Dad. I’ve been thinking about Dylan saying he misses his family. What would I do if he decides living here isn’t working for him? If he goes to see them, they might persuade him to leave me.’
I shook my head. ‘You two are rock solid. He chose to stay on the farm with you because he sees his future by your side. And you could always go with him.’
She grimaced. ‘It didn’t go well the first time I met Dylan’s brother.’
‘You can win anyone over, I think. You’ve got this place back on track. You put your mind to things and look what happens…’ I gestured around. ‘The pumpkin patch went so well; there’s no reason why this summer season won’t be just as popular, or even more so.’
‘Unless it was a fluke.’
I nudged her. ‘You’re the optimistic one of the two of us; what’s going on?’
That made her laugh a bit. ‘I know, I’m sorry. But sometimes, that’s been a fault of mine so I’m trying to be a bit more realistic. And it’s been a crazy twenty-four hours. Dylan thinks the farm is solid profit-wise for five years based on our projections but sometimes, his talk of numbers goes a bit over my head. I guess I try to have on my business head but I end up feeling more than thinking.’
‘I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that,’ I replied as we strolled past the fruit and vegetables that were flourishing day by day. The sprinklers and irrigation systems were on and the air was cool and damp after the earlier summer warmth. Everything felt like it was refreshing itself ready for a new day. I wanted to do the same. ‘You were always a dreamer. I was too but I let it go. And it didn’t make me happy, Willow. I want to get that back. Feeling what is right for me, not talking myself into things that seem sensible or make sense on paper but don’t bring me joy. I’ve spent so long doing what I thought I should do.’ I gestured with my arms. ‘Look around. You’re doing exactly what you want to do. Never be worried or sorry about that. Yes, Dylan may need to rein you in a bit,’ I grinned at her and she rolled her eyes, ‘but he knows how special your dreams are, and wants to be part of it all, and help you make those dreams come true. That’s the kind of partner we all want and deserve in life.’
We strolled on towards the strawberries in a thoughtful silence. Jasmine and Blossom were grazing in their new enclosure and they came over to the gate when they saw us, eager as usual for a treat. Willow bent down and picked two strawberries. She handed me one then ate one herself before picking two more and going over to give them to the ponies. The fruit was ripe now and sweet and juicy like the strawberries always were here. Tasting them sent me right back to when I was a child sneaking strawberries when my aunt and uncle weren’t looking, running around the farm with Willow in the sunshine, watching my mum picking flowers to put in a vase on the kitchen table. Memories that would always be there. I looked around. I was starting to believe more in signs than ever this summer. It felt like the farm was giving me them every day; all I needed to do was listen, and follow where they were trying to lead me. That was the part that required a whole lot of courage, though.
‘And what about you?’ Willow asked me then. ‘What happened while you and Blake were all alone here?’
‘Well…’ I trailed off with a coy smile.
‘Daisy! OMG, tell me everything right now!’
‘Okay, well, we kissed and a whole lot more,’ I confessed as I joined her by the gate to reach out and stroke the ponies as they enjoyed their strawberry treat. ‘And it was pretty amazing.’
‘Wow. I knew there was nothing fake about your dating!’ she declared.
I rolled my eyes. ‘That was partly your fault.’
‘Oops.’ She shrugged. ‘It all worked out, though, right? You’ve let Henry go for good, and now you can have a fresh start here in Birchbrook with Blake.’
‘Well, don’t get ahead of yourself; he won’t be here for much longer.’
‘You don’t know that. Look at Dylan.’
I shook my head. ‘It’s all too crazy, though, isn’t it? We’ve known each other less than two weeks, and we both were in long-term, serious relationships. I almost got married! We shouldn’t even be thinking about each other. There is so much else I should be thinking about. What I’m going to do about work, where I’ll live, what I want after summer ends… It’s a lot.’
‘We Connor women know how to overthink, that’s for sure. But, like you said, we also are big dreamers. You’ll work out what you want to do. You just need to let yourself dream again.’
We watched the ponies jostling each other for our attention and Maple came and sat by us, giving them a smug look when Willow reached down to pat her. Above us, the sky turned hazy, clouds drifting across it.
I tried to clear my mind and instead of letting myself freak out about the next few weeks and what came after them, I focused on what I wanted right here, right now in this moment.
And there was one clear answer.
