I lean my face forward and kiss his lips. Soon, we’re making out like fools, his grip tight on me so I don’t fall and injure myself. When we pull away, breathless, I say, “I need to figure out my job situation, but… I don’t want to leave, Mike. After my accident, I…” I sigh heavily. “I know I said I was okay, but it was fucking scary. Hell, I don’t even know when I’ll be able to get behind the wheel again. I will, but it’s going to take some time. One thing I know for sure is that I can’t take that job if they offer it to me. I not only won’t be able to make that drive, but I don’t want to be away from you that long. The job is perfect for me, but you and I, what we have, is more important.”
He shakes his head. “Den, you can’t not work. We’ll figure this out.”
“I’ll work with Mom if I have to. She already said I could. It is what it is. Life isn’t always easy or seamless. I’ve learned a lot since college and everything that’s happened. Life is full of snags and twisting vines, kind of like this plot of land,” I chuckle softly. “But you can clear it away. Will it grow back? Sure. But with a little upkeep, it’ll be perfect. I don’t care what I do as long as you’re in my life.”
Mike pulls me against his solid chest and holds me in a tight embrace. “I’d never ask that of you. I’d never ask you to choose me over your career.”
“And that’s why I love you so much. You’re selfless and so giving. But you deserve attention and love, too. Someone needs to compromise foryousometimes. As you said, we’ll figure this out, okay?”
“Okay.” He lets me go, cups my face, and plants a kiss on my lips. “I love you. So much. I’m not going to look back and berate myself anymore about not realizing it sooner. As long as you’re mine now.”
“Always. And I love you… With everything that I am.”
Chapter 29
Mike
IsnuggleupagainstDennis, breathing him in, as I lick along his neck, nibbling at his skin. He tastes like the ocean, all salty and warm, from our visit to the beach this morning. It’s been two weeks since his accident, and he’s still a little unsteady on his feet, but we try to take Willow out every day. We just sat in the sand, gazing out toward the horizon, our fingers tangled together, talking about the house I’m going to build for us. I can’t wait. Now that we’re ready to begin our life together, it’s like I can’t get started fast enough. I’d be lying if I said that all my fears have suddenly vanished, because I’ll always be the kind of guy who worries a little too much and overthinks stuff, but they’re good fears, I think. They’re the kinds of fears you have because you’ve finally decided to live your life to the fullest, and there’s something at stake. But I won’t let them keep me from getting what I want out of life. Not anymore.
I slide my fingers through the hair at the back of his neck, still damp from the exertion of going to the beach. His lofty giggles resound in my head from when I blocked him at his bathroom door and swept him upin my arms.“No shower for you. Not now. I want to taste the sun on your skin.”I have no idea where those words came from, but over the past few weeks, since I showed Dennis the plot of land and essentially asked him to move in with me, it’s as if something inside me that was once broken has finally clicked into place.
Dennis protested, pretending to struggle in my arms.“But I’m all sweaty and smelly.”I buried my face in his T-shirt, rubbing it against him, sniffing him loudly.“You are. Just the way I fucking love you, baby. All sweaty and so fucking delectable.”Then, while still being careful, I lifted him off the ground and threw him over my shoulder, real firefighter-style, and carried him to his bedroom.“Miiike!”he squealed.“Put me down, you brute!”
His eyes were overflowing with love and happiness when I put him down on his bed and covered his body with mine.“Brute, huh?”He nodded, an irresistible blush coating his cheeks, freckles exploding across his nose.“My brute,”he nearly swooned. To think that I have a hot as fuck guy swooning over me… It still blows my mind most days.
I can’t exactly pinpoint it, but something has definitely shifted between us since the accident. It felt good to share my fears with Dennis finally, and to have him reassure me he wants to be with me here in Cannon Beach. I never want him to feel that he can’t chase his dreams because of me, so it meant everything to me that he doesn’t see it like that.
“You’re scratchy,” he says, wiggling underneath me.
“Sorry,” I mumble against his skin.
He snorts. “No, I love it. I still have burn marks on my thighs from when you went down on me last night.”
I can’t stop the growl that builds in my throat. “Fuck, baby, my marks on you are the sexiest fucking thing ever.”
“I know, right?” He brushes his thumb against my neck, where a hickey is luckily starting to fade. He chuckles. “The look on Dad’s face the other day when you were going over the blueprint with him and he noticed that fucking hickey.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me! Definitely not one of my finest moments.”
Jon’s been helping me put together a spreadsheet and cost estimate for the building project. He says he’s made a lot of contacts over the years that we can draw on to secure some good deals on building materials, plumbing, and electrical installation. The rest, he reckons, we should be able to do ourselves. I hope he still means that after seeing his employee with his youngest son’s big, fat hickey on his neck.
“It was pretty funny, though. So damn adorable when you blush like that.” He curls his fingers around my shoulders, thrusting his hips up against me. He’s hard. So am I. Constantly. It’s like an addiction. I can’t keep my hands to myself when he’s around. Mom jokes that we’re like those symbiotic creatures that live attached to each other. She isn’t wrong. I can tell that she’s happy for me. She’s also mentioned more than once over the past two weeks that she regrets that she and I didn’t talk sooner after Dad died. I know she still feels guilty for not being able to take care of me and deal with her loss at the same time, but I think I understand it better now. Dennis’ accident put into perspective for me what it must’ve been like for her back then—the enormity of her grief.
“Ugh, I just wanna lick you from head to fucking toes, Mike.” Dennis rolls his hips against me, grinding on my thigh. “I just love how thick your thighs are. I could fucking come like this.”
I chuckle. He did, in fact, come like this yesterday in his parents’ laundry room, when he needed my ‘help with something’ on a top shelf. Help, my ass. I’ve created a damn monster, but I can’t seem to care. I’m just about ready to bust a nut or two myself. Dennis had a check-upat the hospital yesterday, and he got the all-clear for ‘moderate physical activities.’ I wonder if fucking his boyfriend is considered amoderate physical activity?
“Need you.” I grind my pelvis against his, loving the feel of him beneath me. How hard he is. How he moves when I move, as though we’re almost one person. I never thought I’d have this with anyone. This feeling of belonging and being complete. Turns out, he was right there in front of me all along, just waiting for me to catch up with him.
“Need you, too,” he rasps. “So fucking much.”
I ease off him a little, resting my weight on my hands. Our faces are right up against each other, his breath little hot puffs against my chin. His eyes are all glazed over with pent-up lust.
“I want you to fuck me, Den.”
His eyes grow wide as he takes me in, searching my face. “Yeah? You sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure. I’m ready, baby.” I brush my nose against his, rubbing my hard-on against his thigh. “I think I’m gonna die if you don’t fuck me.”
