Mike has Sundays off, and I… Well, I have no job, so we’re free to do whatever. Long Beach, up in Washington, about an hour away, is having a sand sculpture event, and it’s the last day, so we want to check it out. It was my idea to head to a different town, so Mike and I could just be ourselves together without prying eyes. We’ve agreed not to come out to everyone yet. Not because we want it to be a secret, but to have time to ourselves, just us, without probing questions and people watching our every move. It allows Mike some time to adjust to being with a guy. He hasn’t said as much, but I want to make sure he has all the breathing room he needs.
After the event, we plan to grab a bite to eat and then head to the drive-in. They’re showingRise of the Planet of the Apes. It’s an older movie, but Mike and I have never seen it, and figured why not.
We considered taking Willow, but it would be a long day, so she’s staying home with Mike’s mom.
I tug my green University of Oregon T-shirt over black board shorts and put on some deodorant. As soon as I slather some sunscreen on my face, Mike texts me he’s outside waiting in his truck.
I grab a hoodie, and because no one is home, I run out the door and lock it before jumping into Mike’s truck.
“Hey,” he says shyly.
“Hey,” I reply breathily, which is more than just from running outside. His familiar and comforting scent fills the cab of his truck, making my mouth literally water, especially now that I know he tastes as good as he smells.
He’s wearing a pale green sleeveless T-shirt, exposing his lightly tanned, muscular arms. Now, not only do I have a watering mouth, but I’m drooling, too.
After buckling up, I lean forward slightly, willing him to kiss me. He glances around outside before meeting my eyes. His cheeks pink as he leans in, too. I meet him the rest of the way and plant a chaste kiss on his delectable lips. He kisses me back, and I’m hit with a weird sense of relief, mixed with insecurities I haven’t felt before. For a fraction of a second, I was afraid he wouldn’t kiss me back. But he did. Our lips part, and his mouth curves into a crooked smile.
“Hey,” he says again.
I chuckle. “You said that already.”
The tips of his ears turn adorably red as he puts the car in Drive. “Ah, right.”
How is a person this cute and sexy at the same time? But that’s Mike for you.
As he drives north, I rest my hand on his thick thigh and watch the gorgeous world blur by. It’s nice to touch him like this, as simple as it is. There’s no more holding back like I used to. It’s freeing.
An hour later, we head toward the ‘World’s Longest Beach,’ though it’s not the longest. It’s only the longest beach on a peninsula.
We head down toward the event, and I walk closely next to Mike, our arms and shoulders brushing against each other. When our hands touch, he quickly snatches mine and threads our fingers together.
“This okay?” he asks. I just bite my bottom lip and nod.
His hand is warm and calloused, engulfing mine. As always, I feel protected and safe with him. He smiles down at me, his eyes hidden away behind sunglasses. My heart thumps against my chest in the best possible way. After all these years, it’s still hard to believe we’re giving this a go between us. I feel like even after all the shit that’s been dumped on me, I’ve won the lottery at life. Mike makes it all worth it.
The event is amazing. I’ve never seen so many gorgeous sand sculptures, and they’re for everyone. Children are making them along with adults. They range from novice to expert. My favorite is a long mermaid lying in the sand, but Mike’s old-school, loving the massive sandcastle that has turrets and everything.
The area is packed with people, but I manage to get some cool shots of Mike in front of some sculptures without people in the background. He flexes his arms in one, looking adorably goofy. I love it when I get to see his playful side. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, I file it away in my memory.
After we’ve seen all we want, Mike and I, still holding hands, walk toward the water. The late July day is hot, and we’ve been in the sun for several hours.
We kick off our slides and tread into the cold water, instantly cooling us off. Mike turns to face me and pushes his sunglasses up over his head, pulling his long bangs away from his face, giving me full access to his beautiful features. Then he grasps both of my hands in his. He looks around and back at me again. “I want to kiss you.”
I smile stupidly, and I know I do, because I feel stupidly happy inside. I’m utter mush. I hate to compare them, but Geoff was outgoing, loud, rigid, and particular about everything. He always called the shots in whatever we did. Another sign I missed, I guess. Mike is none of those things. I start wondering if I chose Geoff because he was nothing like the boy I crushed on so long ago, or the man standing before me now.
“What?” Mike asks as if he can read into my soul.
I shrug, smirking. “I’m just waiting for you to kiss me.”
He lets go of my hands and cups my face. He stares at me for so long I wonder what’s going through that head of his. Then his eyes slowly slide closed as he inches closer to my face. He tilts his head, brushing his lips against mine, and I melt all over again. Every time Mike kisses me, it’s with his whole being, like he’s telling me he’s here and he’s not letting me go. Each kiss is a promise.
My eyes sting, my chest overflowing with the amount of love I have for him. All those years of hoping and wishing have finally come true, and I won’t take a moment of it for granted.
This time, it’s Mike who swipes my lips with his tongue, and I open for him so he can explore my mouth. I’m loving how he’s growing bolder, asking for what he wants. We had strawberry ice cream earlier, so his lips and tongue taste berry-sweet.
Eventually, we pull away to breathe, and Mike rests his forehead against mine. We stand there, the water lapping at our calves, the sound washing away all the surrounding people. Nothing else exists at this moment but Mike and me.
I want to tell him so badly that I still love him, but I can’t. My fear that he’ll reject me is too strong, despite trusting him. It’s not his fault, but my issue. It’s not rational, and yet I can’t help the feeling. Hopefully, with time, Geoff’s deceit will fade and I’ll be able to let go completely.
