When I get home, the house is still empty with everyone at work, and Aaron is doing who knows what.
I curl up in my bed, wanting to drown under my blankets.
If I wasn’t feeling unworthy before, I feel even worse now that I’ve failed at my job. This winning streak of failures I’m on is exhausting and frustrating. Or is it a losing streak?
When my phone buzzes, I know who it is without even looking at the screen. I don’t want to answer it, but I do anyway. I lift my phone from where it lies on the bed and look at Mike’s text message.
Mike:How’d it go?
Me:I’m fired.
I turn off the phone because I don’t want to talk about it, and Mike will just push me.
I shut my watering eyes. They burn as I fight the steady stream of tears. I’m so tired of feeling this way… and fucking crying.
My eyes pop open, not realizing I fell asleep. I don’t know what woke me until I feel a heavy arm wrap around me and tug me close against a warm and solid body.
Mike.
“I’m so sorry, Den,” he murmurs into my hair.
I simply nod, unable to face him, but his being here means the world to me. His palm is pressed against my chest, so I thread our fingers together and focus on his body and the comfort it exudes.
Today has made me feel like I’m in free fall, but Mike is my anchor. While he can’t fix my problems or make them go away, his mere presence is still grounding me, keeping me together.
“Thank you for being here,” I whisper.
“I’ll always be here, Den. Always.”
Chapter 17
Mike
Thepastfewdayshave been kind of brutal. It felt like floating on a pink cotton candy cloud after kissing Dennis, only to crash land in a cactus face first. They fucking fired him. I’m having a hard time believing it. Can’t they see how amazing he is? How passionate he is about nature and about teaching the value of conservation and respect for the wild to kids?
Dennis falling to pieces in my arms while he cried over losing his job was tough, but it only made me more determined to prove to him he can count on me. I know he felt like shutting me out, just like he did right after he came back home, but I’m having none of that. I meant what I told him a few days ago in the bathroom when we kissed; I want him, and I want to give this thing building between us a real shot. Now that I’ve admitted to myself and him how I feel, there’s no going back. I can’t see myself with anyone else. I don’twantanyone else. If that means putting my own needs aside and focusing solely on him right now, so be it.
That means that even though he might not be feeling it this very minute, I’m going ahead with planning our date. I want it to besomething that will bring back the light in those fucking beautiful eyes of his. Something that will give him a reprieve from the harsh reality of losing his dream job. So I’m going all in on the romance even though I don’t think I have one single romantic bone in my body.
After googlingromantic first datesandperfect beach dates, I’m ready to throw my damn phone out the window. All scenarios seem so… over the top somehow, and not like Dennis and me at all. Willow is moping next to me, trying to message me with her snout against my thigh that she’s so over this. Yeah, you and me both, baby girl.
Eventually, I drop my phone on the comforter and get up from my bed, then run downstairs.
I find Mom in the kitchen, Bruce Springsteen’sI’m on Fireon full blast while she’s preparing dinner. Hamburgers, I think. My stomach growls, and I realize I forgot all about food while trying to plan the perfect date for Dennis. I stand next to her and sigh, snagging a piece of lettuce from the bowl.
Mom takes me in, a frown between her brows. “What’s up, buttercup?” I can’t help groaning, stuffing the piece of lettuce into my mouth.
“Buttercup?”
She laughs, then leans over from where she’s slicing tomatoes, and presses a quick kiss against my cheek. Without saying a word, I grab another carving board from the cabinet and then pull a knife from the kitchen drawer. I reach for the cucumber and start dicing it for the salad. After a few minutes, I finally say, “Mom, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, sweetie.”
“What was the best date Dad ever took you on?”
She snorts as she shapes some of the meat into a burger. Then she laughs. “Your Dad was good at many things, but arranging a date…” She shakes her head, a wistful frown tugging at her lips. “Then again, it never really mattered. In the end, all that mattered was that we were together, just the two of us.”
I nod, the meaning of her words settling inside me.Together. Just the two of us.Of course. Dennis doesn’t need fancy or expensive; he just needs my undivided attention. And I can give him that.
