Chapter One
Hank
Now
“So… Henry wants to take me hiking, he says.” A ghost of a blush swept across Colton’s stubbled cheeks, and Hank failed to bite back a smug grin. His nephew might’ve been with his boyfriend Henry for nearly four years now, but he still resembled a lovestruck teen whenever Henry’s name slipped from his lips. Or when his name was brought up during random conversations around town, for that matter.
“Does he now?” Wiping the excess oil off on his worn navy coveralls, Hank turned and stuck out his tongue at Louis, who was staring daggers at him. The pup—who had long ceased to be a pup—knew from experience that he was more likely to getsomething out of Hank’s pockets than Colton’s. It didn’t help that Louis’ otherdaddywas a veterinarian. If only dogs could speak human language, Hank was pretty sure that Louis had quite a few tales of woe to share about limited snacks and bland diet dog food.
“Yeah… Up in the mountains. This weekend.” Colton swiped at his dark-brown hair, hints of gray peeking through the longish strands spilling onto his forehead and around his temples. Hank nodded. Yeah, Henry had filled him in already about the weekend getaway. Hank had already stuffed his cabinets with dog treats after he’d agreed to look after Louis. What his daddies didn’t know, right? Well, there were other things that Colton didn’t know…
For a second there, Hank had been worried that Henry was going to tip over when he’d stood in front of him in the auto shop the other day, hands twisting nervously, blue eyes flickering between Hank and the dirty shop floor.
‘I’m thinking of asking Colton to marry me,’he’d murmured, and Hank had almost—just almost—felt like teasing the younger guy, pretending he hadn’t heard him. Henry had shifted on his feet, his features still boyish, innocent almost, his eyes conveying a hint of uncertainty that Hank hadn’t seen before. Not even when Colton had been at his lowest and they’d all feared that he would never come back to them.Steadfast and unwavering.Henry hadn’t hesitated for one second back then when Colton had gone through his own version of hell.
Hank had nodded quietly, a dull pain coasting through his chest, glimpses of golden strands of hair slipping through his fingers. Carefree laughter echoed through his body.Eugene.He’d always thought there would be more time. More time to put a ring on Eugene’s finger. More time to kiss that soft spot beneath his left ear again and again. Or that small patch of pale skin beneath his belly button that would make Eugene squirmdeliciously beneath him and make Hank feel like the fucking king of the world. ‘A kingdom of two,’Eugene had whispered against his chest. ‘That’s all I need, my love. Our kingdom of two.’Or more time to walk down to the creek at twilight, Eugene’s slender fingers entwined with his own calloused ones. The sun, dipping behind the horizon, painting Eugene’s beloved face in a glowing hue. And there had been time. Until there wasn’t.
‘Then you should,’Hank had replied, his voice solemn to his own ears as he’d quickly gathered himself, shaking off that deep-seated feeling of loss that overcame him occasionally. ‘Then you should, Henry. No point in wasting any time.’A flicker of recognition and sympathy had moved across Henry’s face while he’d nodded.
‘Okay. I will, then. Thank you, Hank.’The‘thank you’was spoken carefully, and Hank knew very well what Henry meant. There was an entire world hidden in those two mundane words. Thank you for not giving up on him. Thank you for giving him a home. A family.
“Nice weather this time of year for camping out,” Hank spoke, coming back to the present. “Not too hot midday, but still not too chilly in the evening, either.”
Colton nodded. They enjoyed their quiet days together in the shop, one day resembling the previous, conversation flowing easily between them when they felt like it, replaced by a comfortable silence when there was nothing to say. It really had been no hardship when Colton—his long-lost nephew—had returned to Nebraska four years ago. No, no hardship at all.
“Yeah, I think so.” Colton nodded, a small smile tugging at the right corner of his mouth. “You alright with the juvenile delinquent?” He grinned, nodding at Louis, who gave them his familiar‘who, me?’look.
“Of course. We’ve already made plans, my wingman and I,” Hank winked.
“Oh, yeah?” Colton grinned again, narrowing his eyes at Louis. “It better not involve movie nights with limitless dog snacks.” He bent down and rubbed the pup fondly behind his left ear, mumbling nonsense against his soft forehead. Yeah, it might have been Henry who’d found the dog chained to a fence, but there was no doubt the pup was Colton’s more than anyone’s. There was this invisible bond between them. This almost fated companionship. One lost soul finding comfort and recognition in the other. Only now, they were no longer lost.
“I plead the fifth,” Hank smiled as he patted his stomach, the rough cotton fabric straining across his midsection. He really needed to lose a few pounds. And ease up on the visits down at Tilly’s. The diner food—as good as it was—didn’t exactly do him any favors weight-wise. He knew that. Of course he did. But he preferred the easy banter with Tilly and Vernon every time he came in over the solitude of his own kitchen. The house was quiet after Colton had moved out, building his own home with Henry nearby, and even though they were great at inviting him over, Hank didn’t want to impose too much on the younger couple.
Younger.Hell, at fifty-nine, he was only sixteen years older than his nephew, but most days he felt like seventy going on eighty, his back bugging him from the moment he got out of bed until late at night. He couldn’t recall the last time he’d had an uninterrupted night of sleep. If it wasn’t his sore limbs reminding him he was getting older, it was images of Eugene haunting him, a teasing smile hidden in his blue eyes.
‘Are you doing your exercises, Hank?’Dr. Sloane had asked him during his last visit to Whitney. ‘You gotta do them every day to strengthen your back muscles. Turn it into a routine. With a job like yours…’ Yeah, yeah, he knew it all, didn’t he? Allthe stuff that he ought to do. But there was no one to check if he did or not. Not since Eugene had died. Man, could that man nag…
‘Did you take your vitamins, sweetheart?’
‘In a minute.’
‘No,now. Otherwise, you’ll just forget.’
‘Jesus, Eugene! I’ll do it in a minute.’
‘You’ll do it now, Hank. Remember that bad cold you had back in March, coughing your lungs up for weeks on end?’
‘Yeah, I remember… Do I get a kiss, too, if I behave?’
‘You’ll get as many as you want, my love. I’ve got an endless supply of vitamins and kisses, too. Just come get it.’Just come get it.
As it’d turned out, there had been an expiration date to Eugene’s kisses. The thing that Hank had taken for granted had become something that he would now give his right arm to experience just one more time. Eugene’s soft lips pressed against his own, the faint taste of coffee on his tongue, the sweet hum slipping from his mouth when he leaned against Hank’s much larger frame. Yeah, what he wouldn’t give for just one more moment like that with Eugene. Hell, even just the fragment of a moment.
“You wanna grab lunch at Tilly’s?” Colton’s deep voice pulled at him. “I gotta get some oil from the hardware store, anyway.” He smiled goofily.
“Oh yeah? Any other stops on the way?” Hank winked as he shook off the last impression of Eugene leaning against him. ‘I’ll always be with you. Even though you won’t be able to see me, I’ll always be with you.’He still remembered Eugene’s last words to him in their bed moments before he took his last breath. He’d insisted that Hank bring him home from the hospital in Chadron once the doctors had discontinued his chemo treatment.
‘Please don’t let me die in a hospital, Hank. I wanna go in my own way, at home, with you. Only with you.’And he had. Just like Eugene had breezed into the auto shop decades earlier, catching Hank’s heart on the way, he’d blown right back out the bedroom window on an exceptionally warm March morning almost seven years ago, taking Hank’s heart with him.
