maddox
FOUR YEARS AGO
“Dude,why do you look so bummed? We just won a big game,” Andrés says as he passes me another shot. We blew North Carolina State out of the water tonight and are throwing a party at our apartment to celebrate.
“Tomorrow is my three-year anniversary with Annalise and we’re spending it apart.” I tip my head back, downing the shot. “I had the whole weekend planned out for us, but she said she had too many projects to catch up on. I won’t be able to see her for another month.”
“I’m sorry, man. Long distance must be so hard,” he says softly, placing a hand on my shoulder. “I definitely wouldn’t be able to survive if I went that long without seeing Katie.”
“I’m dying, man. I hate being away from her. We went from seeing each other every day to only once a month, if that.”
If it weren’t for my father, we wouldn’t be in this predicament. The fact that I decided to pursue a career in basketball didn’t sit well with him. During my senior year of high school, he kept pushing me to major in business, but I refused.
That’s when he gave me an ultimatum—if I wanted to play college ball, I had to secure a full-ride scholarship, or he’d cut me off entirely. Millennium University was the only school that came through with the offer so, reluctantly, I accepted.
I had dreamed of living in New York with her—riding the subway, going to Broadway shows, and building a life together. Instead, I’m stuck in Chicago, hundreds of miles away, seeing her only through a screen for barely an hour a day. It’s not what I imagined at all.
“Coach said NBA scouts are attending the next game.” Andrés shifts the conversation in an attempt to cheer me up. “It’ll be your time to shine. Maybe you’ll get drafted to New York. That way, you wouldn’t have to be apart from her.”
“I hope so. I’m so ready to get out of Chicago.”
“Hey, Chicago isn’t so bad. You wouldn’t have met me if you went to college elsewhere. And you gotta admit”—he nudges his shoulder against mine, his mouth lifting into a smile—“I’m pretty awesome.”
A laugh bubbles out of me. “I guess.”
“Come on, I need to redeem myself in beer pong,” he says, pulling me away from the corner. “I made the mistake of partnering up with Harrison and we got our asses handed to us.”
The last thing I remember is winning a beer pong game with Andrés. Everything after that is a blur.
“Stop saying you love me!” Annalise shouts. “Youclearlydon’t have a clue what it means to love someone. The only person you’re capable of loving is yourself.”
“How could you say I never loved you? Charlotte and I only slept together once in high school, and it happened way before you and I got together. I promise I haven’t been with anyone but you. You are the only one I want, Rosie.”
I’ve done everything in my power to make her feel loved, to make her feel special. My words and actions were wasted for her to say that I don’t love her and for her to think that I would cheat on her.
“Enough! I’msickof your lies!” she shouts, tears falling from her cheeks. “You’re exactly like my father!”
An overwhelming heaviness settles in my chest. Her father—the man who put her and her family through so much—is the worst possible person she can compare me to. It’s like a gut punch to know that she can even put me in the same category as someone like him.
How could she think that I would ever hurt her like that? I know the pain she lived through. I know how much it affected her. She has to know that I would never do that to her.
She has to…
With my heart left bleeding out on the sidewalk, I open up my apartment door to find Andrés in the kitchen ransacking the drawer.
“Sorry, I misplaced my wallet. I swear I’ll leave as soon as I find it.”
I mumble my acknowledgement, not caring enough to enunciate.
He shifts his attention to me, noticing my flushed face and bloodshot eyes. “Dude, are you good? Where’s Annalise? I was almost scared to come home because I didn’t wanna walk in on y’all banging in the kitchen.” He lets out a laugh.
I grab the gift bag Annalise left for me and bring it to the couch. Reaching inside, I pull out the contents—a jar full of origami hearts and a hand-knit beanie and scarf.
Twisting the jar open, I pluck out one of the paper hearts and open it.
“Earth to Maddox,” he says, waving his hand in front of my eyes that are still locked on the small piece of paper.
“Annalise broke up with me.” My voice cracks, tears falling from my cheeks and onto the paper. “She hates me. I think I lost her forever.”
