maddox
After lunch,a notification pops up on my phone alerting me that the Uber driver is arriving. I was planning to drive Annalise home in hopes that we could spend more time together, but she insisted I stay and visit with my mom.
I could tell that she didn’t trust herself to be alone with me. Especially since she nearly lost control earlier when we ended up with our bodies tangled together on the couch.
Watching Annalise and Okasan share laughter over a meal filled me with a warm wave of nostalgia. I know she only stayed because she didn’t want to appear disrespectful by turning down Okasan’s food, but part of me clung to the hope that she wanted to continue being around me.
I wish I knew the real reason why she was back home. Annalise is not the type to give up on her dreams so easily. Her returning home because she felt homesick doesn’t make sense to me. Especially since she spent the last four years living in New York.
It’s never been easy for Annalise to open up to people. She likes to pretend everything is okay because she doesn’t want toburden anyone with her problems, but I’ve always been able to tell when something is bothering her. She can wear a smile on her face, but I can still see the pain behind her eyes.
“Don’t be a stranger! Swing by the restaurant any time. You will never have to worry about paying.” Okasan pulls Annalise into a tight embrace.
“I will! It was so nice to see you again, Mrs. Kamado.” Annalise smiles. “Thanks again for lunch!”
“It was nice to see you too, Annalise. You have been missed.”
Annalise waves her goodbye and slips on her shoes.
“I’ll walk you out,” I say, holding the door open for her.
The door clicks shut behind us. With a nervous glance, she stuffs her hands into her pockets, eyes darting to meet mine. “Uh—thank you for the clothes, and for last night. I’m sorry for all the trouble I caused and for ruining your weekend.”
“Oh, don’t apologize, Monroe. You didn’t ruin my weekend,” I say, reassuring her with a smile. I could never be mad about spending time with Annalise. It’s clear that she may hate me, but this was one of the best weekends I’ve had in years. All those nights I spent partying till sunrise and losing myself in various women don’t even come close to how it felt to wake up next to her.
We stand there in silence, looking at one another. There are so many questions I want to ask her, so many things I want to say.
What would have happened if we hadn’t been interrupted earlier?
Can we meet up somewhere private one day, so we can finally talk and I can tell you all the things I’ve been wanting to say to you all these years?
Before I can say anything, the driver lightly honks his horn, and I miss my opportunity.
She clears her throat and throws her thumb over her shoulder. “I—uh… I should get going.”
“Right. Don’t want to keep him waiting.”
I start to lean in for a hug, but decide against it. I don’t know if I would be able to handle the sting of her rejection. Letting out a shaky breath, I tuck my hands into my pockets instead. “Text me when you get home so I know you made it safely.”
She nods, giving me a quick smile and walking toward the car.
Her eyes linger on me for a brief moment before she slips into the back seat.
The car peels away, and a part of me leaves with it.
Opening the front door, I step back inside and walk to the kitchen to help Okasan with the dishes. I always tell her to load them into the dishwasher, but she insists on hand washing.
“Why didn’t you tell me Annalise was back?” she asks, arching a brow at me as she scrubs the pot.
“Because I found out less than twenty-four hours ago. She works at Dauntless, the athletic brand I’m collaborating with.”
“See! That’s clearly a sign from God!” She passes me the cleaned pot, smiling at me giddily. “You two are meant to be together.”
I roll my eyes to conceal the warmth swelling in my chest. Maybe itisa sign from God. I lived away from San Francisco for four years, and during all my visits back, I never once encountered Annalise. Maybe the timing wasn’t right then, but it could be now.
But then Annalise’s words slice through my mind, destroying whatever hope I had.
“You may have your dream career, a nice car, and all the money in the world, but you sure as hell will never have me.”
