It’s a slow, deliberate transformation. The passage from my world into his. Watching it unfold only increases my sense of unease, of alienation. Everything here is curated, manicured, suffocating in its perfection.
I remember my question from earlier.
“Where’s my dad going? Can I talk to him?” I ask, raising my voice to be heard over the cicadas that hum relentlessly from the magnolia trees above us. They cling to the waxy leaves, hide like secrets among the trees’ ghost-pale blossoms.
“The facility said no contact with family members for three months so the patient can concentrate on recovery.”
I frown, suspicious he’s lying.
Is this just another way to isolate me? Control me?
Carrson reads my silence. He holds up his hands. “Their rules. Not mine. I swear. Also, I’m not telling you where he’s being treated. Not until I’m convinced you won’t make a run for it.”
My hands ball into fists. It kills me that I can’t talk to my father, and, even worse, I have no idea where he is. “God, I want to push you into traffic so badly right now.” I point toward the street, but because the universe hates me, it’s completely empty.
Not a single car in sight.
Carrson glances at the road, then back at me, one brow lifted in amusement.
I cross my arms and try, unsuccessfully, not to pout. I expect him to get mad. I just threatened his life, after all. I brace for the argument, butinstead, Carrson smiles. He steps in front of me and starts walking backward. “If you were successful, you’d make a lot of people happy.”
“Really?” I ask, still petulant. “I’m not the only one who wants you dead?”
“Oh, no. There’s a long list. You’ll have to take a number.”
He says it like it’s funny, but I can’t see the joke in that.
“You see,” he says casually, “everyone either wants to kill me or fuck me. It’s kind of my lot in life. Which one are you going to be, Laurel?”
“Kill. Definitely kill.”
I say it like I mean it, because I do, but also, I don’t. As much as I can’t stand him, I can’t picture actually taking his life. Or anyone’s, for that matter. It’s just not who I am. That’s one of the reasons I want to go into medicine. I believe every life matters. I learned that the hard way when my mom died, how much one person can mean. How their absence leaves behind a hole far larger than the space they once filled.
Carrson wags a finger at me. “Nah. I don’t peg you as a killer. More like a lover.” With a crooked smirk, he says, “Just do me a favor, huh? Don’t fall in love with me.”
I snort and roll my eyes. “You’re literally thelastperson I would ever love. Did you hit your head and forget about the part where I wanted to murder you like...five minutes ago?”
He throws his head back and laughs, unguarded and loud.
“You know what I like about you?” he says.
“My winning personality?”
“Your sarcasm.” He grins. “Most people are scared of me. They just tell me what they think I want to hear. But you? You don’t give a rat’s ass. Probably because you’re blissfully unaware of the viper pit you’ve tumbled into, but still, it’s nice. A change of pace.”
“What?” I squint at him, sure he’s messing with me. “You find me saying I hate you and wish you were dead to be charming? Entertaining?”
“Both those things.” He shrugs. “Everyone else just thinks it. You actually say it.”
I shake my head. “There’s something seriously wrong with you.”
He laughs again. “I never said there wasn’t.” Without warning, he stops. I slam into him so hard I ricochet backward, stumbling. Before I can fall, Carrson grabs me by the upper arms and pulls me close, too close, his lips brushing my ear as he whispers, “You won’t kill me. Which puts you in the fucking category, Kitten.”
His breath against my skin, that slight press of his lips near the shell of my ear, hits like a live wire. Electric. Dizzying. After everything I’ve been through, I thought I was done with lust. Thought no man could ever touch that part of me again. But damn Carrson. His words strike a match, and suddenly I’m burning. Heat flares across my cheeks, down my neck, low in my belly. I freeze, breath caught, heart pounding. A second pulse throbs deep in my core.
I shove him.
Hard.
