He snorts. “But it was working for me.”
“Come on,” I say coaxingly. “What were you thinking, just now when your eyes got sad?”
“I smell like sunshine, but my eyes look sad?”
“You contain multitudes.”
He laughs, and it dawns on me how rarely I’ve heard that sound coming from him. It’s rich and full, and it fills up the night. I’ll never have another night like this with him again. Just the two of us, sitting this close, having just kissed.
Manuel’s chuckle dies as he catches sight of the expression on my face. He reads me easily, and his glowing eyes seem to dim. Or maybe I think they do because I want him to hold on to this moment and remember it forever, like I will.
“Come here,” he says softly.
I lean forward, and his lips meet mine again. This kiss is nothing like the one from before: It’s soft and sad, and I can almost taste the word waiting on his tongue. The one he won’t say but means with all his heart.
Goodbye.
CAPÍTULO
Veinticinco
The sound of the door creaking open jerks me awake. I blink into the dim room, turning around in the bamboo bed to face the door. Manuel pokes his head in.
I sit, wiping the sleep from my eyes. “Are you leaving?”
He nods. I climb out of the bed and shuffle over to him, throwing my arms around his waist. “Be safe,” I mumble.
He grunts, and I lean away far enough that I’m able to peer up into his face. “That’s it. That’s all I wanted to say. Was that so terrible?”
His lips twitch.
My arms fall to my sides. “I’ll see you when you return.”
But things between us will be different then, and both of us know it.
Manuel seems to realize this too, because he doesn’t move, one foot inside the building and another on the stone path that will lead him out of Paititi. Slowly, he tucks a wayward strand of dark hair behind my ear. I shiver at his touch, and his eyes heat. Then he backs away, as if I’ve burned him. I let him go without a word of protest. We’ve said everything that needed to be said.
It’s over.
I stand in the doorway, watching him go. He doesn’t look back. I swallow hard, fight to keep my breath steady, and spend a few minutes admiring the way the morning light—fiery and golden—streaks through the sky. The sight calms me. The beauty of the jungle settles my frustration, soothes my warring heart.
Choosing Sonco is the best decision. As a condesa, I’ve done right by my people.
If only my heart felt the same way.
I shut the door and sag against it. I say a quick prayer to Luna that Manuel will return in one piece. And then another thought occurs to me. Feeling incredibly awkward, I mumble a prayer to Inti and Pachamama, too. The words are foreign on my tongue, but I push through. Then I go to my little cot and promptly fall back to sleep.
I don’t feel the least bit bad about it.
There’s a loud knocking on the door—again.I raise an arm as if to brush the noise aside. When it continues, I mumble a curse, stumble toward the door, and yank it open. Sonco stands outside, dressed resplendently in a purple tunic with blue and gold thread stitched at the collar and shirtsleeves. His polite smile stretches wide as he takes in the sight of my hair—which I’m sure looks fetching, given that I haven’t brushed it inweeks.
“Buenos días. Did you sleep well?”
I nod. “I’m so sorry, but am I late to something?”
He shakes his head. “No. I just figured you’d be up. We all rise with the sun.”
Right. Because they adore the sun god here. Or maybe they don’t like wasting away the morning like I apparently do. As he stands there, it strikes me that he’s probably expecting me to invite him inside. I’m sure my floundering looks foolish to the Illari king. “I appreciate your stopping by, King Sonco.”
