There’s a long silence. If it wasn’t for Jordan’s loud breathing, I’d think we’d been disconnected.
Why are you asking? You know I hate talking about this shit, he grumbles.
It’s because I have to do this charity fundraising thing with him. But if you let me tell your story to the fundraising lady, maybe I can get out of it. Or, better still, get Mats taken off the project, since Marjorie likes me better anyway.
Well, you don’t have my permission to share this shit. And you already know what happened. That asshole had it in for me from the first puck drop. I showed him up in drills, so he got worried about losing his place on the team. At first, it was just slashing and spears behind the play, always when the coach wasn’t looking. But when that didn’t work, he made up bullshit about names I called him. Name-calling, like we’re eight fucking years old.
What did he say you called him? I hate grilling Jordan, but this is the important part.
He dropped the race card, which is total bullshit. All I said was the normal shit you say when you’re playing and things get cranked up. You know how it is.
I shake my head even though he can’t see me. Do I trash-talk my opponents? Absolutely. But I insult their skills or their gameplay, not them personally.
I’ve never done any name-calling, I say.
Yeah, fucking Saint Cleo. Women’s hockey is different.
Tell me exactly what happened, I insist. Maybe something was misunderstood, like Jordan used a word that sounded racist but wasn’t.
I can hardly remember, that’s how unimportant it was. You know how it is now. Everyone is such a fucking snowflake, and they lose their shit if you look at them the wrong way. And Matsumoto is the worst—always sucking up to coaches and acting like his shit doesn’t stink. And his word is better than mine because he’s on that fucking Athletic Council.
That is the maddening part. Mats should not have been allowed to complain about Jordan and then sit in judgement on his own complaint. But since I’m not directly involved, I’ve never been able to find out the details, even from my own teammates who are on the council too.
Clee, you know how hard it is for people like us. We have to fight for every scrap, while guys like him get everything on a fucking platter.
Mats is someone with every advantage—scholarship money, a rich family, even NHL connections. Whereas my brother had nothing but his hockey skills. Our family isn’t poor, but hockey is really expensive. I’ve never had new skates in my whole life.
I sigh. Yeah, I get it, Jordan.
We chat a bit about what he’s up to, then he hits me up for twenty bucks.
You still owe me from last time, I complain as I’m transferring the money.
I’ll get you on payday, he promises. Jordan has been working at a construction job that Dad got him ever since he left Monarch. Got to go. Love you, sis.
I smile, even though he can’t see me. Love you too.
I head downstairs for a late breakfast. We have a long hallway where we play mini-sticks or practise shooting foam pucks. Jinx and Becks are already playing, and I jump in.
Oh, it’s Nelson. Coming in hot. Strips the puck off Moore, and… score! I make fake crowd noises. We jostle around for a bit, then I finally make it to the kitchen. Since we have a day off, I make myself a big breakfast with pancakes and bacon. Everyone is attracted by the smell of bacon.
I didn’t know we had bacon, Woolly says. Can I have some?
Sure. It was in the freezer. We got it on our last food run, I explain before my next mouthful of pancake.
Becks sits beside me and steals some bacon too. I knew this would happen, so I cooked the entire package. If there’s any left over, I’ll make a BLT for lunch.
Are we still on for a run this afternoon? she asks.
Yeah. Got to keep this body in tip-top shape. I pat my stomach, which is full of pancakes, bacon, and coffee.
After digesting my late breakfast, Becks and I head out. I’m not a huge fan of running in the snow, but I love being outside. As a native Minnesotan, I have zero fear of winter.
Last night’s game sucked donkey balls, Becks says, once we hit our stride on the trail.
Yeah. If we had won, we would have been the number one team in the conference. The only good part is that we didn’t lose to one of the teams we’re fighting for first. Portage College and St. Clare University are the other top teams, and we’ve been jockeying for points all season.
So, are we going to talk about why you sucked last night? she asks. Usually, I like Becks’s no-bullshit ways, but there are issues I’m avoiding right now.
