His mouth opens, then closes.
He said it wasjust work.
“Just how many times have you done this? Slithered your way into a woman’s life, flirted, made her think she was special—all of it, only because of a case you’re working?”
“Never.” When I glare at him, he sighs. “Okay, flirting? I do it all the time. Sometimes it’s easier than the alternative. But you and me—it has nothing to do with the case. Nothing, and youknowit.”
I ignore him and keep walking, but he doesn’t let up.
“And besides, you’re seeing other people, aren’t you? You don’t want me.”
“No,” I burst out, my voice sounding squeaky. “I don’t.”
“Well, this is a small town. We’re going to keep running into each other while I’m here, so—”
“And whenareyou leaving again?” I whip around, pinning him with a glare.
His face tightens, like I’ve just lobbed something heavy at him, and there’s this fleeting, bitter satisfaction. Why should I be the only one who suffers? The one who’s been made a fool of, the one who gets to be left behind? He should know exactly the pain I experience seeing him every day, second only to the pain I can already taste that I’ll feel once he’s gone.
We stare at each other, our hurt crashing together in one big, painful wave. Until his expression softens. “Scarlett, I…”
“Youliedto me,” I say, my chin quivering hard.
“I omitted some things—”
“You just won’t admit it, will you? Youlied.”
His shoulders drop. “Okay. Yes, I lied. But Freckles, I couldn’t tell you—”
“Don’t call me that.” I start to walk again, but he moves to stand in my way. “You shouldn’t have pursued me. Until you were sure—until you could be honest, you just shouldn’t have…” Let me think he was different. Made me believe, for once, in something I’d told myself never to count on.
“I thought I’d catch the killer in no time. I thought I’d get to tell you, and we’d laugh about it.” He edges closer, his gaze piercing. “Scarlett, I’d already pushed you away once. I couldn’t do it again.” He leans closer. “But I didn’t so much as kiss you. I knew that until I could tell you the truth, I couldn’t touch you.”
A bitter laugh bubbles past my lips. “You set limits for yourself so you wouldn’t feel guilty. You drew the line at kissing or sex because youknewwhat you were doing was wrong.” The prickling sense of betrayal makes my chest ache. “Only it turns out our lines are different, Rafael.”
He rubs a hand over his face.
“While you draw yours at kissing or… whatever—”
“Scarlett…” He groans.
“—Idraw mine at sneaking into my life. At sharing Chinese in my kitchen. At sleeping in my bed and playing video games and making me feel important and… andsafe!” My voice is rising, tears welling up as I realize people are looking.Perfect. “Just forget about it, okay? I’m leaving.”
“You’re right. I fucked up,” he says as I open the car door and set one foot in.
“Agreed,” I shout back.
He leans forward, holding the door open. “No, Scarlett, I fucked up when I said you wouldn’t find any reason to push me away. When I told you I wouldn’t disappoint you. Because you werelookingfor a reason not to be with me, and it was just a matter of time before you found it.”
“Yeah, okay.” I flip around, facing him. “But no matter how many times I looked over my shoulder,you’rethe one who jabbed a knife there—actually, you pointed agunat me.”
He doesn’t say a word, and with a final exhale, he lets the door go. Can I be both happy this conversation is done and devastated? Because I definitely feel both.
“Dear Rafael Gray, I love you,” he says.
I turn to him, hand poised to close the car door, and see him unfolding a piece of paper, the logo of Paige’s dad’s dentist office on the bottom. Is that…
Oh my God.
