I hold a hand to my chest. “Lucas? Ghosting? How shocking,” I joke. “How’s James handling it?”
“He’s doing all right,” she says, shrugging. “It’s a bit of an odd situation, though. I honestly don’t know if Lucas will even come to the wedding—not that I’m complaining. But James made peace with the reality that they were never going to be close a long time ago. We knew what we were getting into when we chose to be together. Besides, James’s parents were over the moon about our engagement, and that’s what really matters.”
I nod along. “Right. Just because someone’s family doesn’t mean you have to like them.”
“Exactly,” she says, shooting me a small smile.
We continue to peruse the beautiful fabrics. Turns out Anna’s dress was one of the cheapest in the entire store. My fingers skim over liquid silk, satin, tulle, and chiffon.
My eyes are drawn to an exquisite purple halter dress with a shimmering overlay that catches the light. I smooth my hand over the fabric, hearts in my eyes.
“Try it on,” April says.
I look at her. “No, I couldn’t. It’s too much.”
She places her hand on my shoulder affectionately. “Please, try it on. It’s beautiful.”
When Anna and I emerge from our dressing rooms, April gasps.
“I can’t tell if that’s good or you’re horrified,” Anna says.
April’s eyes water. “You both look amazing!”
“Oh, this islush.But bloody hell, it’s tight,” Anna mutters, twisting her arms behind her back, struggling with the zipper. She wobbles on her tiptoes as she attempts to drag the zip down.
She takes a large step forward and the dress surrenders with a horrific ripping sound. We all gasp as the back of the dress splits open and Anna stumbles, trying desperately to hold the fabric together. “Crap! I’m totally naked underneath!”
I reach out to catch her, but she’s falling too fast. She topples into a mannequin, which sets off a domino effect. The mannequin crashes into a rack of expensive dresses, which then tumbles into another row of display mannequins positioned in the boutique’s front window. We watch, frozen, as each mannequin goes down with a thunderous bang.
“No, no, no!” The shop assistant bolts toward the front of the store, as if she can somehow stop the disaster from unfolding.
Anna rights herself and finally finds her footing, but in her panicked state, she steps on the inner hem of her longskirt. The fabric pulls down, revealing her breasts and vag in all their uncovered glory. She stands, naked as the day she was born, exposed to the street outside, where a growing crowd of onlookers gapes through the window, witnessing the entire mortifying spectacle.
A group of girls erupt into laughter as a mother covers her son’s eyes, and I swear I hear someone wolf-whistle.
My hands fly to my mouth.
We stand in silence for what feels like an eternity before Anna closes her eyes in horror and clears her throat. “Ladies. I’m about to bend over to pick up this dress, and I’d really appreciate it if you both averted your eyes.”
Crack out, she slowly bends down, snatching up the dress and covering herself with as much dignity as she can muster before shuffling back into the dressing room.
Of course, I say the only thing that springs to mind. “You’ve got a great set for a good tit-wank.”
Safe to say we didn’t buy the dresses.
Aside from Anna being totally humiliated, the shop assistant looked as though she was about to murder us.
We stop for a delicious and much-needed boozy lunch at a seafood bar by the Ritz Carlton. I throw back an oyster and take a long pull of bubbly.
“Why didn’t you wear any knickers if you knew we’d be trying on dresses?” April asks Anna.
“I like to let it breathe,” Anna says.
I choke. “Sorry. What?”
She shrugs. “Sometimes I forgo underwear to let my fanny breathe.”
“Well, at least you weren’t trying on trousers,” I say.
