“She looked at me like she didn’t even know me,” I say, my voice low.
“I know, and that hurts. But that’s not forever. She’s reacting. She’s grieving a future that doesn’t exist anymore. She’ll be okay. She’s strong. And I know she’d want you to be happy,” she says. “As for fighting and failing—wouldn’t it be worse to never know what could have been?”
Deep down, I know I couldn’t live with myself if I never gave Max a shot. He’s fought to show me he’s worth believing in.
“The regret would eat me alive,” I confess.
Her answering smile is small and tender. “Maybe it’s time you stop letting your past dictate your future. Give yourself some grace and allow the two of you a chance.”
I muster a tearful smile, and as April wraps me in her arms, I feel a stir or hope—that this time, I might be strong enough to trust and let myself fall.
Chapter Sixty
Gemma
The morning of April’s wedding arrives and I’m still shitting myself over the fact that Anna and I haven’t spoken in almost a week. I feel sick.
April touched a nerve on Thursday night. As confronting as it was to hear her dissect my dating life, she was right. I’ve spent the last couple days thinking—properly reflecting—about the mess I’ve made of things instead of just drowning in wine, self-pity, and dick. Turns out I’ve been so preoccupied protecting my heart that I’ve forgotten what it feels like to be truly happy.
What a fucking revelation.
After rinsing off the spray tan I marinated in last night, I lather on a thick coat of vanilla and coconut lotion over my bronze skin.
April and James canned tradition—they opted not to have hen or bachelor parties—instead spending their last night as boyfriend and girlfriend together rather than apart. Anna and I are meeting at April’s house to get ready.
Today will be the first time I’ve seen Anna since she discovered me and Max, and to say I’m nervous would be an understatement. That’s like asking “Do you think theTitanichad a bit of a leak?”
Truth be told, Iwantto open myself up to the possibility that Max and I could have something magical together. I want to try. But I need to speak to Anna first.
I triple-check my day bag to ensure I haven’t forgotten anything before jumping in an Uber.
Anna isn’t there when I arrive at April’s, so we indulge in celebratory coffee and brownies while we wait.
“How are you feeling?” I ask April, settling into her kitchen, cradling a steaming mug.
She inhales a sharp breath and her hands flutter to her chest. “It doesn’t feel real.” Her face glows as she speaks. “I’m so happy, Gem. I can’t wait to marry him.”
A soft smile spreads across my face as I watch her with such overwhelming tenderness.
My heart expands at the pure elation in every word. She’s about to spend the rest of her life with the man of her dreams, and despite everything we’ve all been through this week, this moment is untouchable.
“He’s the luckiest man in the world to have you. You’re perfect for each other, and I’msoproud of you,” I tell her.
It wasn’t easy for April and James to get here. After Lucas broke her heart, I wasn’t sure she’d ever trust someone enough to walk down the aisle again. But she did. She fought for love and won.
And if she can find her happily ever after following such a tremendous heartbreak, then maybe so can I.
The doorbell rings and I nearly soil myself.
April’s eyes flick to me. “It’s going to be fine,” she reassures.
When she opens the door, Anna stands at the threshold, bridesmaid dress in hand and dark circles under her eyes. Still, carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders, she smiles through her pain, wrapping an arm around April and pulling her in for a firm hug.
“You’re getting married today!” She beams.
“I can’t believe it,” April says. “Oh, my phone’s ringing. I’ll be right back.”
Anna frowns. “What? No, it’s not. You don’t even have your phone.”
