“I’m not hungry.” And she had a roll and some fruit in her room for a private meal. She paused at the doorway. “Thank you. For sharing your true self with me. I’m glad you trusted me.”
“Of course, dear. Feel better.” She looked up from her stitches. “Oh, and as a word of caution, my room is adjacent to yours, yet down the hall from Lord Rothchild’s. The wall between your room and mine isn’t as thick as one could hope.”
Amanda pressed a hand to her throat. “Lord Rothchild’s room from now on,” she promised and made her escape.
Reggie stayed with Lady Mary and her sleeve full of treats.
Shutting herself in her room, Amanda strode to the window and flicked the edge of the curtain up. The sun was just beginning to set, and Julius still wasn’t home.
She dropped the curtain in disgust. This townhouse wasn’t his home. She could have no expectation that he would return to her each night. That he would care that she worried about his disappearances. She paced between the window and the empty fireplace. She had told him she expected nothing more than a few educational and diverting nights, a safe place to explore her limitations. She needed to honor that promise. Julius was nothing more to her than a restorative aid.
She flopped face first on the bed. She was the biggest liar in England. She may have intended for Julius to be nothing more than a means to an end, but he hadn’t remained such. The thought of him walking away when Marcus and Liz returned …
She drew her knees up and hugged her pillow. The thought of that physically hurt. In such a short time, Julius had come to mean the world to her. That he could discard her so easily was not to be borne.
She pushed up to sitting. But would he discard her? Perhaps, while he’d been working his way into her heart, she might have done likewise? Circumstances changed. Just because Julius had once said he could give her nothing more than his nights, that didn’t mean he still felt the same.
Lady Mary had shown courage by telling Amanda who she really was. Amanda could do no less. She needed to tell Julius her desires had changed.
Marching from her room, she ensconced herself in the wide chair in front of his fireplace and waited.
And waited.
She jerked awake when an unfamiliar step fell in the hallway outside Julius’s door.
Amanda jumped from the chair and raced to his bed. She untied one of the tester curtains, covering her side of the bed, just as the door opened. Frozen like a stag before a hunter, Amanda listened as the floorboards creaked. It definitely wasn’t Julius. She would recognize his step. His breathing. The man on the other side of the curtain was a stranger.
Something dropped to the floor. There was a whoosh, a hiss, and Amanda recognized the sound of a fire crackling to life. She dropped her head. It was just a servant getting the room warmed. No one was after her.
The door snicked shut, and Amanda peered around the curtain. All clear. She clambered off the bed. The heat from the fire leeched through her clothes, and she stepped closer to the flames. With the room warming up, there was no reason she couldn’t greet Julius in a more seductive manner. If she was to convince him of a future with her as his mistress, it was best to showcase all that she had to offer.
Without his aid to dress that morning, she was back to wearing a shapeless gown that buttoned down the front. It was easily shed. She removed her slippers and stockings and contemplated her chemise.
Leave it on and retain some modesty? Or greet him as a new-born babe enters the world? She drew the thin cotton over her head. She would be baring her soul to Julius tonight. Might as well do it while baring her body.
She picked up her clothes, folding them neatly, and placing them on the bench at the foot of the bed. The slippers went underneath. She tied the bed’s curtain back up and climbed onto the mattress, lying back on the crushed velvet coverlet.
She turned one way, and tried to picture what Julius would see when he walked through the door. She twisted the other way, shifting her knee. Perhaps totally nude was a mistake.
She thought of Lady Mary with all her lovers and girded her courage. She could be a seductress, too, damn it. Finding a position she liked, she rested her head on her arm and waited. She would not fall asleep again.
She blinked awake to find Julius standing beside the bed, gazing down at her. She rubbed her face. “Julius. When did you get back?”
“Just now.”
“What time is it?”
“After midnight.” Julius picked up a lock of her hair and rubbed it between his fingers. “You should go back to sleep.”
Remembering all the mornings she’d woken up alone, she asked, her voice tart, “But then where would you sleep?”
His eyebrows drew together. “What?”
“Never mind it.” Amanda shook off her irritation. His leaving before dawn only bothered her because she didn’t know if it meant anything deeper – that he didn’t want to stay. With her. She took a deep breath. Pushing to her hands and knees, she crawled to the edge of the bed. “I missed you. You’ve been gone awhile.”
“Yes.”
Amanda pursed her lips. That was all the explanation she’d get?
