“I’m in the middle of an eye-fuck sandwich. I feel so dirty. Gross.”
My heart skips a beat.Ishe eye-fucking me?
“There’s no eye-fucking going on,” I retort like I have an alternate personality from the one inside my head. “You’re just…beingyou.”
“You mean, observant?” he deadpans, cocking an eyebrow.
I can’t fight the laugh at his confident resolve. So, I just shake my head and take a drink, making sure to direct my gaze to a safe area.
“You know what? Fuck it.” He throws his hands up. Leaning back on his stool, he folds his arms over his chest. “You’re finally single. I say go ahead.”
“Go ahead,what?”
I cringe when he waves a hand toward the bar. As if I haven’t drawn enough of Chris’ attention to myself already.
“Now’s your chance to fuck him out of your system after all these years. Maybe it’ll be cathartic.”
The way my body lights up at his suggestion has to show on my face when I peek at Chris yet again. I wish I could crawl under the table, but I settle for shielding my eyes again. “Oh, my God. I’mnotgoing to fuck him. He barely said a word to me the other day, and not much more just now.”
It’s a ludicrous idea, even coming from Jamie. Me and Chris…fucking now.
My cock doesn’t seem to think it’s a bad idea, but what does my cock know?
The fizzle… I need to remember my quest for finding myself and the eternal fizzle, one that doesn’t evaporate after dating.
“Besides, I’ve been talking to Miles,” I throw out to change the subject and maybe even to distract myself.
“Who?”
“I told you about this last week. You know,Miles.”
“You mean fucknugget? No!” he wails, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Would you listen to yourself! He’s already got you talking like him.You know?”
This again? Jamie must be mistaking him for someone else.
“Whatever. Well, he’s coming into town next week, so…I don’t needcomplicatedright now.”
“Are you dating him?”
“No, we’re just going to get dinner or something. The center is going to have a fundraiser appreciation dinner, and he said he’d be my plus one for it.”
“Then it’s not complicated.” He rolls his eyes and leans forward. “Listen to the expert here. Casual sex is never complicated. Dating is. You are a free, healthy,youngishman with lots of options.” He gestures toward the bar, making mecringe. “Exhibit A—screw your college demons away.” Moving his outstretched hand toward my phone, he adds, “Exhibit Fucknugget—get a free meal and some terrible conversation, followed by, perhaps, a night of very boring sex.”
He ignores the unimpressed look I cast at him, sitting back and picking up his drink again. “However, ifIwere you, I wouldn’t do them in that order. Always save the hot, anger-bang sex for last.”
Closing my eyes, I take a deep inhale. I’m not even going to argue why sleeping with Chris wouldn’t be an anger bang because I don’t feel any of the hostility that situation would require. How does my friend make a living giving advice like this?
“How many followers do you have again?” I ask dryly.
“Six hundred thousand.”
“Baffling. Besides, I can’t believe you’re encouraging me to hook up with him after all the shit you gave me when we were in college.”
“You were a shy little sex zombie then.”
“Wow. Thanks. And now?”
“Now, you’re a successful, confident homeowner who doesn’t have to settle for fucknuggets or jocks that crawl in through your bedroom window.”
