Aliz is still fully clothed, but when I try to undo the buttons of her shirt, she tuts, holding my wrists at my sides. “I don’t fuck humans,” she says. “But what else did I say, Cassie?” One hand moves to my thigh.
“You asked—” I start, a tremor in my voice. Her fingers inch closer, taunting me with their proximity. “If I wanted to be an exception.”
“And do you?” she asks, lips on my neck, sending a shiver across the thorned lines. Her fingers finally brush over my folds, but far too light. “C’mon,” she says, and I pull her up for a kiss, hoping she’ll hurry already.
I grab her shoulder as her thumb presses against my clit. I bite her neck, and I finally get a small victory from her, a sound caught in her throat. She digs her blunt nails into my thigh.
“You’ve already fucked me,” I say, trying to remain in control, not arch into her touch. Her free hand grabs a fistful of my hair and gives a light tug.
“But you need it again, don’t you?” she asks, lips on mine.God yes.
If I wasn’t so twisted by her, I may have clung to my pride. But Aliz is right. I need it again.
“Yes,” I say, breathless.
She draws her fingers away, pulling back until our eyes are at level. “Beg for it.”
Whatever expression I just made makes her laugh. “You—” I don’t finish the insult I was trying to conjure. She kisses me again, but her fingers draw further away. In our shared dreams, Aliz was like a wild animal. Now, she’s so in control it’s killing me. I need her. I tug at the buttons of her shirt, biting my lip when I see the hardened tips of her nipples against her vest.
“Be nice, Cassie,” she whispers, lips on my neck. Her tongue runs over the Familiar’s mark, and pleasure spreads through each individual line, until I can think of only one thing. She kisses her way down my torso, following the mark’s path. I arch my back, needing more. “I’m not asking for much.” She grabs my right leg, hoisting it over her shoulder. “Beg.” I feel her breath between my thighs, and I thread my fingers through her hair.
“Please.”
Based on the cockiness in her voice, that flimsy cruelty, I was expecting she’d make me work for it. But instead, Aliz proves she’s just as impatient as I am, moaning when she finally spreads my lips and runs her tongue over my entrance and up to my clit. I try to bite down a sound, tugging her hair as I struggle to remain upright. “Fuck!” I cry. She slides three fingers into me, not giving me a second to breathe before working them fast and hard.
At some point we make it back onto the bed, and “It’s my turn,” I say, running a hand down her back. I find the hem of her shirt and slip my fingers inside. “How can I repay you?” Her skin is smooth and warm, and although I want to touch her the way she just touched me, I wait.
“I guess you could proofread an essay I was supposed to hand in tonight,” she says, sounding a tad more nervous than I was expecting. I draw my hand back out and look up at her. “How does that sound?”
“Or I could go down on you,” I say, fixing her with my gaze. Aliz lets out a short breath, before clearing her throat.
“I’d love that. But…” She hesitates. “I don’t think I’d be able to control myself.” Her gaze drops to my neck, to the Familiar’s mark which is so stark against my skin. “But thanks.”
“Maybe once the mark is gone,” I say.
“Right,” Aliz replies.
Our legs are still tangled together, my hand is still rubbing her back, but we both tense as we realise what I just said. This won’t happen again once the mark is gone.
Once Aliz’s feelings fade, things will go back to normal.
The only reason I was able to admit that I loved her, that I told a lie, knowing she’d recognize the truth, was because she thinks it’s because of the mark. But as much as I wish it wasn’t true, I know that what I’m feeling right now didn’t bloom into my chest through the thorny vines of our blood contract.
I cannot continue to delude myself, because I know now, as well as I know the weight of a dagger between my fingers, that I love her, and I also know this is ridiculous, but what about my life isn’t? What second in the last four years has been anything but that?
My love for Aliz isn’t a curse or an enchantment. It’s as real as it can get.
But I’m glad that Aliz’s isn’t. Because she’s right about one thing.
She can’t love a human, and she most certainly can’t love a vampire hunter.
Chapter
Thirty
I feel her cool breath on the back of my neck. Slowly, my eyes flutter open, the room pitch black. Aliz has one arm around my waist, the other above my head. I breathe in, wondering if it’s just a dream. But then she stirs, mumbling incoherently against the nape of my neck.
“Morning,” I say, my voice coming out hoarse. Last night we got carried away. At least until the moon is in its first quarter, we can be together. Afterwards we’ll revert to being nothing to each other. I press my hands over hers, and she hums.
