Addie slid into the sleek black leather interior, feeling like an imposter. She slid all the way across, and Toni slid in at her side.
Once the door closed, Toni said, “You don’t need to slide over when we take a car. I can walk around.”
“Too long to wait,” Addie blurted. “When… as in there will be other times? This isn’t one night, and then I don’t see you for another year?”
Toni reached over and took Addie’s hand, twining their fingers together, and mused, “So the real you is as unfiltered as I remember from Scotland. In email, you seemed to be more reserved.”
Addie looked down. “I edit and reedit before I send. Does it bother you that I’m unfiltered?”
“Not at all.” Toni settled back in her seat, still holding on to Addie’s hand. “I like a direct woman, especially if a woman plans to be in my bed.”
Addie stared at her, noting the quirk of a small smile. Arrogant? Maybe, but Addie washerefor it. She didn’t answer. She simply settled back into the luxurious seat… and waited. Toni was calling the shots, and Addie was bracing for being romanced, seduced, and falling in love.
After a year of small talk, she was ready for more. She wanted to tackle everything, talk about everything, share everything. But after several quiet minutes with only the sound of the radio and hum of the wheels, Addie started to worry. It was her superpower. Worry. Self-doubt. Anxiety. It was part of why she loved acting. When she was someone else, shewasn’tAddie. She was a character, and she liked to go for roles where the characters were confident. That meant she didn’t worry—unless she took that kind of role. But so far, she went after roles where she could be bold.
“Addie?”
“Do you have regrets?” Addie whispered.
“When?” Toni frowned like it was the strangest question ever. “Tonight?”
“Now. Then. I don’t know. You’re really quiet, like maybe you regret ordering me to dinner.” Addie pulled her hand away, feelingthe loss and hating it, but she didn’t want to screw this up by being clingy either.
“Ordering?” Toni echoed.
“It sure sounded like an order,” Addie muttered.
“Did you feel like youhadto say yes?” Toni countered.
“No. I wanted to see you. I just want to know if this was what you want.…” Addie glanced over. “So, regrets?”
“Not at all. I’m just tired.” Toni gave her a small smile. “I love my jobs, both of them, but—”
“So you’re still teaching full-time? You never mention much about it, but you never mentioned your book tours or TV interviews either.”
Toni startled. “So you knew the whole time?”
“I went to hearyoutalk at the conference.” Addie took a deep breath and then blurted out, “That’s why I was in the bar that night. To try to meet you.”
Toni turned to face her. “You were at my talk and came to The Lady’s Hand to meetme?”
“Yes…” Addie squirmed. “I wasn’tstalkingyou! You were just brilliant, and I was trying to land the role of Mina in a play, and when I found your lecture online, I searched you because you made all that stuff interesting, and I saw you were in Scotland and—”
“You came to the bar because you heard my lecture,” Toni clarified. “You weren’t a student, though…?”
“Nope. I saw the conference had a lecture on Victorian lesbians, and… I was struggling reading the research books. Some of them are so boring! But then I heard you talk, and you had the answers I needed, so much so that I wanted to know more, and I wanted to say thanks. I tried to talk to you after your talk, when you were leaving, but I gave up.” Addie took a breath, but her words still tumbled out in a hurry. “Anyhow, I got the role. I used what I learned from your lecture, and from talking to you, and I got the role.”
“Not that day, though,” Toni said.
Addie sighed. “No, but I wanted to see if I could be Victorian enough, and then you looked at me like…”
“Like you’re gorgeous,” Toni filled in.
Addie didn’t look away. “Is that weird that I went to the bar to talk to you?”
“No.” Toni was staring at her, an unreadable expression on her face. “The fact that you were excited by my lecture is actually flattering.”
“I was also pretty excited by how you worried about me when you saw me,” Addie said, half embarrassed by her jumbled confession and half wanting reassurances. “And when I left you there.”
