“Okay, so she strolled into the bar with her hair pulled back in this long braid,” Toni said, picturing Addie. “She was dressed in a nearly transparent white cotton nightdress, faux Victorian.”
“Sexy, right. You said that.”
“No. Victorian sexy. A trembling Lady Godiva. I swear, Em, it was like she was plucked from my dreams. She was obviously afraid, innocent, and… she pickedme.There were a lot of other women, but she met my eyes and stood there trembling.” Toni paused at that detail. If Addie had been at the conference, had she sought Toni out?
“Okay, sexy, has good taste, likes history.” Emily ticked the list off on her fingers. “Should I be worried?”
“And every time shit got too real this year, I emailed Addie. I didn’t tell her what was happening in my life, just… she was this safe place for me to be just me. Not a new professor. Not a debut author. Not daughter to a woman who barely remembers my name lately. Justme.”
Toni and Emily continued folding her clothes. Toni shoved down the unfamiliar flush that Addie had picked her as a protector, that she’d undoubtedly known about the book for a while, that she’d heard Toni speak. She couldn’t think about that; it couldchangesomething precious if she allowed that.
Most women were more apt to see Toni for what she was: a good time with no expectations. Addie looked at her like she was worthmore.Addie knew her and still looked at her that way. It changed things on some level Toni couldn’t explain.
Toni shook her head and snatched a pair of socks up. “Remember doing this when we were kids?”
“Your laundry skills aren’t much improved,” Emily teased. “And if you bring Addie back here to finish what you started…”
“I probably shouldn’t,” Toni murmured. “Maybe business meeting is better.”
“Was she boring to talk to?”
“No.” Toni grinned, thinking back to the wicked edge hidden under Addie’s innocence. “She was quick-witted. Funny.”
“Sexy, funny, likes history, brave—”
“Brave?”
“She walked into a bar half-dressed. That’s either brave or stupid,” Emily pointed out, not wrongly.
“She definitely had that ‘hell with it, I’m going to meet a woman’ energy.” Toni shook her head. “I was probably like that as a teen.…”
How had someone so vivacious and beautiful been able to avoid being caught up by dozens of people? Unless she really wasn’t innocent… but her reactions were definitely inexperienced. When she’d been attempting to—
Emily poked Toni’s shoulder, pulling her into the present. “Sweetie, I mean this in the nicest way, but you’re like a bear in need of nourishment after a long hibernation. Your logic for changing your sexual habits is all well and good. As your agent, I’m even grateful that you aren’t out there causing a scandal.”
Toni stared at her. “Did you just compare me to abear?”
“Astarvingbear,” Emily said without even the hint of a smile, even though her eyes sparkled with mischief. “And that lovely creature, the one who wowed you enough to name a character after her, is looking at you like she wants to have you for her main course.”
Toni looked at the ceiling, as if praying. Then she poked Emily in the ribs. “All I’m saying is ifyouever decide to get on one of those dating sites, Miss Haide, I reserve the right to edit your profile. ‘Funny lady who likes either a stick and berries or a honeypot. Either welcome so she doesn’t turn into a hibernating bear.’”
Emily snorted in laughter. “Too true. I’m not subtle about what I need. Sort of like my best friendusedto be… Remember her?”
“Oh, I remember.” Toni sighed. “Damn, Em, I feel like I got suddenly old. I went to a bar last week, and I was talking to this woman. It was going well, and you know what happened?”
“What?”
“She asked if I wanted to go back to her place andsign her book.” Toni shuddered at the thought of how awkward that could’ve been. “What do I do, Em? Lead with ‘Hi, are you barely literate?’ or ‘I’m looking for a woman who hates books.’ I can’t sleep with fans, students, or anyone who might feel pressured or swayed by… my job stuff.”
“Try ‘I’m hoping to hook up and not have you leave your terrible manuscript on the table the next morning,’” Emily commiserated.
They were silent a moment, but then Emily said, “Was Addie the last person you were with?”
“In a manner of speaking,” Toni hedged. She turned away and put the last of her clothes in her suitcase.
“Sweetie?” Emily prompted.
“The last I touched, yes.” Toni forced herself not to squirm. “She was a bit of a pillow princess, which is fine usually.…” Toni sighed loudly. “She had my trousers around my knees, and her hand in my shorts, and then she just left.”
