“Fine.” Prospero looked back at the man who’d joined them. “Look. Things are atypical right this moment. Magic doesn’t stay in this world, and you are impervious to this leak because you’re meant to be a witch someday.”
“When?” He folded his arms, leaning against the stairwell and staring at them as if this was all perfectly normal.
“Typically, when you have a near-death experience.”
A strange look came over him. “Like if I got trampled and then walked it off?”
“Fuck.” Prospero closed her eyes for a moment, and Ellie knew what had happened without hearing her next words.
“Didthat happen?” Ellie asked him anyhow.
“Yep. Then suddenly they were all pigs, and I was walking away.” He shrugged. “Got a shower. Felt fine, so I went for a walk and…” Hegestured at the chaos behind them. “Things are weird as shit around here.”
Prospero looked at him and then Ellie. “He ought to go back.”
“If you say I should take him, you’ll end up sleeping at your desk eternally and not inmybed,” Ellie warned. “I am here to help you.” She pointed at the young man. “What’s your name?”
“Ian.”
“Right. Ian can stay here while we go fix this, or he can tag along. He’s notmypriority either.” She looked back at Ian. “Sorry.”
He held up his hands, palms out, as if to say, “No problem.”
“Fine.” Prospero glared back at her. “Stay here and be in peril,butif you get injured by roaming pigs or whatever else, I’ll be furious with you.”
Ellie smiled and promised, “I’ll be as careful as you are.” That earned her another glare. “Maybe the pigs won’t follow. They seem to be angry at him, probably because he’s why they’repigs.”
Prospero glanced at Ian. “Stay.”
“No.” He smiled. “Take me to your wizard president or whatever the saying is.”
“I swear Sondre will be…” Prospero paused and called, “Hob!”
Clancy, one of the castle hobs Ellie particularly liked, popped into existence on Ellie’s shoulder. “Hello, Trouble Witch.”
“Shit! There’s a… there’s a…” Ian pointed. “On your shoulder.”
“Hobgoblin,” Prospero supplied. “The headmaster needs to retrieve this.” She pointed at Ian. “Remedial witch. He’s not ready to deal with what we are here to handle, but he’s trailing us like a bad smell.”
“Hey!” Ian folded his arms and glared at her.
“A new student! How lovely!” Clancy clapped his hands together cheerily. “And how goes the hunt?”
“There are pigs.” Prospero gestured. “We are stuck on the side of a building becausepigs.”
“Might I transport you to your field of battle?” the hob asked in a cheerful voice. “As I am already here?”
“After the headmaster is made aware of…” Prospero nodded toward Ian, who was trying to poke the hob’s foot where it rested on Ellie’s shoulder.
Ian leaned closer, as if to look at the hob’s suit-clad little body.
Clancy winked, turned, and farted loudly in Ian’s face before he vanished.
“Gross. What was that?” Ian scrunched up his face.
“Hob.” Sondre’s voice appeared before he did. He looked around at the pigs, the fights, the fire, and then met Prospero’s gaze. “Why are you calling me here?” He scowled at Ian. Paused again. “Oh. I see. Remedial witch.”
“Indeed,” Prospero said.
