“Why?” Dan caught and held his gaze, even though the shadows made it harder to do so. “Why do all this?”
“Ilikeyou.” Axell shrugged again. “You need to have food… and the last time you went with the headmaster you came back very sad.”
Dan looked away. He hadn’t told Axell everything. He couldn’t tell Axell for his own safety, and Axell’s, too. “This was easier than that. I just had to boost the energy of the healers.”
“No helping the scary witch erase memories?”
Dan gaped at him. “I… we… I never said that!”
“Ellie and Maggie both have memory holes. They’re bothmarriednow.” Axell shook his head. “You think I am stupid because I am a singer? Just a stupid musician?”
“No!”
“Maggie no longer remembers her anger with you,” Axell pointed out. “She is here thinking headmaster is a good man. They had sex before, but then Maggie was angry. And now, Ellie follows the scary witch like a sad woman. Before she was not this eager to be with her.”
Danshushedhim. “What if someone hears you? Stop. Stop saying these things.”
Axell stood and crossed the room. “Youdid this thing for them, Daniel. You did a terrible thing.”
Calmly, Axell reached out and curled around Dan’s slightly less-bony-than-before hip. Dan froze. He always did when Axell reached out.
“You did these very bad things, and I still am here.” Axell’s hand tightened. “I am still here with you. I made you a romantic date. I do not want you only for sex, Daniel. You can refuse me, and you can do bad things. And I amstill here.Are you here with me? Do you forgivemymistake, too?”
Dan felt like ice had hit him, thinking about the danger Axell could bein if anyone realized what he knew. “Don’t risk dying from drugs, please, and you can’t tell anyone what you know, Axell,” Dan whispered. “They’re dangerous. Ellie was raging, fighting.…” He felt tears escape and race over his cheeks. “She was willing to die to get out of here. Maggie’s kid was on the ground like a dead person, and there was Prospero. Sondre helped her and all, but it was her. If they know you figured this out—”
“It is done now,” Axell whispered back. He pulled Dan a little closer. “I am not reckless enough to say what I know. That witch is scary, and the headmaster does not like me already. I will not tell.”
Dan closed the rest of the distance between them and accepted the comfort of Axell’s embrace. “I couldn’t tell you about it. They said—”
“Who cares what they say? You can tell me anything.” Axell stroked a hand up and down Dan’s spine. “You asked why I used the drugs. It was because I thought my heart would break inside me. I could not sing. I found someone who made me feel good and alive andreal,but then you pushed me away and I hurt.”
“Axell—”
“I do not mean it is your fault,” Axell said quickly. “I chose to give in to the bad feelings, but you asked why.Thatis why. You pushed me away and would not let me help you.”
“If I told you, she would erase your mind,” Dan said softly. “I was afraid.”
“Then be afraid with me. I was afraid, too. Stop pushing me away, Daniel. I am where I want to be, where I thought you wanted me to be. Do you want to be with me?”
“Ido.” Dan wrapped his arms around Axell. “You could have anyone you want, though, so—”
“Apparently notanyone,” Axell rebutted with a wry smile.
“But if I stop running, will you still want me?” Dan asked in a small voice.
“Yes.” The word resonated with truth. “I will want you the same. More.”
And Dan was glad he had finally found the courage to ask. He tilted his head slightly. “Then kiss me, please?”
Axell’s mouth curved into a smile briefly before finding Dan’s lips, and when they kissed, Dan was sure that this was exactly what he wanted.
This is home. He’s my home.
18Ellie
As they walked through the tiny downtown area of Crenshaw, Ellie couldn’t stop herself from poking at the puzzle of the secret between them. “I can figure this out, you know? Aunt Hestia lives here without magic; that’s weird. She doesn’t want to be here, but I wanted her here. I have big memory gaps, and there is alargersecret.”
The admiring looks Prospero was darting at her made her feel powerful, made her want to revel in that, but she was coming to understand that she could not. Whatever the secret was, Prospero decided that it meant that they could not cross the very lines that Ellie was near desperate to cross.
