But what David was asking of me was different. This wasn’t me making a choice, it was an emergency. And while Birdie didn’t like teen dogs, for some reason she could tolerate pups. Usually all it took was a single correction and they bowed to the queen.
I realized that the only thing standing between a dodgy Facebook adoption and a home that could help Edith reach her potential was one simple word.
So I said it.
“Yes.”
chapter three
Nothing was going the way I would’ve wanted, but this was one scenario I couldn’t micromanage into submission. I trudged up the stairs to my apartment with my work bag slung across my back messenger-style, Edith’s trash bag of stuff from David clutched under one arm and the trembling puppy under the other. My wrist was still sore from the fall and being weighed down wasn’t helping matters.
I could’ve sworn I saw tears in David’s eyes when I said I’d take her, which mademeweepy. When it came to dogs it didn’t take much to turn on my waterworks. Everything else in my life? Mojave-dry. Or at least it felt that way lately.
We’d both sniffled and looked away to hide the fact that the spur-of-the-moment handoff was hitting both of uswayharder than we were willing to admit. But when David knelt down and kissed his dog on the top of the head? That’s when I shifted into full-on, don’t-try-to-hide-it, ugly-face bawling. He’d placed his forehead against Edith’s and when she licked his cheeks I was convinced she was helping him hide his tears. I was sooverwrought by what was going down that when he asked me to keep herno matter whatI’d stupidly agreed to it. I probably would’ve promised him my firstborn in that moment.
“Honey, we’re home,” I said under my breath when I reached my door. I rearranged the puppy and tried to dig through my jacket pockets for my keys. Edith looked up at me and trembled so hard that the tips of her ears vibrated. “Aw, little baby, you’reokay! You’re going to be fine!”
I realized that I was moving way too fast for her liking so I slid down to the ground in the hallway and took her onto my lap. She stood on my legs awkwardly, one paw raised like she was impersonating a pointer.
“Listen, Edith, you’re about to meet Birdie. She might be bitchy at first but that’s her right. She’s old, and you don’t know how to dog yet, so prepare for an education. But you two will figure it out. I hope.”
I watched her looking around and realized that I’d just been emotionally manipulated into a decision I would normally need a month and several Excel spreadsheets to justify. A puppy, right as the holiday season was about to kick off. And this was going to be year two of me faking it. It took almost all my energy to put on my happy face so the rest of the world thought I was normal and that I enjoyed the stretch of forced gaiety from early November through December.
I used to enjoy it. Alot. I had the boxes of decorations packed away at Frolic to prove it. But then my dad had the nerve to die in early October nearly two years prior, forever yoking the unimaginable loss to the orgy of familial celebrations. The holidays with just my mom, my sister, Taylor, and her husband, Ryan, felt like a half-finished puzzle.
I cleared my throat, startling Edith. “Let’s get this over with. You ready?”
She gave me a tentative wag, as if to tell me that she would soldier on and do her very best, which almost set off the tears again.
Birdie wasn’t known for her watchdog abilities thanks to her failing hearing so I knew she wouldn’t greet us at the door. It gave me a chance to put my stuff down, grab a baby gate stashed in the hall closet, and plop Edith down in the kitchen behind it. The high ceilings and tall windows in the ad for my apartment in this old building had camouflaged the fact that the entire place could be crossed in a dozen steps.
My old lady came strolling out of my bedroom and shook off, still unaware that there was a ridiculously adorable trespasser just a few feet away from her. Again, not a watchdog. I took a few minutes to say hi to her, stroking down her chestnut fur then rubbing the black patch on her forehead until she closed her eyes. Birdie looked like a tan Belgian Malinois who hadn’t gotten the memo about needing to come across as intimidating. Her pointy ears were a touch too short, her eyes a little too soft, her mouth a little too smiley. Add in the gray muzzle and she was the picture of a sweet, mellow senior. I peeked over at Edith, who seemedveryaware that she was about to meet someone new. Her head was tipped back and her tiny nose was working overtime.
“Hey, Bird. I have some news for you...”
I trailed off as she investigated my hands. She was used to the smells of my students lingering on me, but she seemed to understand that what she was detecting was actually coming from inside the house, like a phone call in a horror movie. Birdiefinally darted past me and right up to the gate, her tail high and quivering.
“Bird, be nice,” I cautioned. “She’s been through a lot.”
If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes I never would’ve believed what happened next. Instead of being blustery Birdie, or grumpy Birdie, or my least favorite, asshole Birdie, she dropped into a down in front of Edith. The little dog went into the world’s fastest play bow then hopped a few times.
“Oh, that’s good,” I said softly.
Birdie lowered her head so that it rested on top of her paws. Her tail wagged slowly, and she couldn’t take her eyes off the puppy. Then it hit me. She hadn’t seen a puppy this small in ages, and never in her own home.
My tough old girl Birdie was going into momma-mode.
“Are we okay to try this?” I asked, placing my hand on the gate and glancing between them. “You ready, Edith?”
I slid the gate to the side and Edith stepped out of the kitchen all stiff-legged and confident, like shewasn’tthe puppy who hid under the chair at every class. Birdie slapped the floor with her front paws like she couldn’t believe the new BFF strutting toward her, and the room went still as they brought their noses together.
Edith stood still and allowed Birdie to check her out, but whipped around to prevent her from doing a full inventory of her rear end. It was surprisingly ballsy, but Bird rolled with it.
After a quick walk around the block with the two of them I changed out of my work clothes and into leggings and my dad’s oversized Nantucket hoodie. It had taken me a year to wear it and now it was my go-to comfort outfit. I was finally at the point where the faded pinkish-red thing felt like a hug insteadof a reminder of all we’d lost. After I washed my face I stuck on two shiny charcoal under-eye patches that Taylor had given me. Thanks to the freebies she scored through her job I was well versed in self-care.
Edith was asleep on her feet after all the upheaval so I settled on the couch and pulled her onto my lap. Birdie hopped up beside us, still wagging at the puppy like she couldn’t believe her luck.
I grabbed my laptop and navigated to my schedule, finally allowing the stress I’d been ignoring to wash over me. How was I going to juggle this new, very adorable problem that had just been dropped in my lap? Sure, I had friends with a doggy daycare business, but as much as I loved and trusted them, I didn’t want to risk athingabout Edith’s new life. If she was going to be mine her critical socialization period had to be perfect, without any chance of a negative situation shaking her already dicey foundation.
