“It’s all good, Jed. My full name is Brooklyn. In addition to being afraid of Catholics, Mamma has always been obsessed with everything New York, even though she’s never been there.”
“Guess you’re lucky she didn’t name you Rockefeller Center or Broadway.”
“I guess so.”
Jed smiled. “It’s good to finally meet you, Brooklyn.”
“You too, Jedediah.”
Thecar ride back was equally as quiet as the ride to the restaurant. However, this time, Patsy Cline crooned as we held hands, and I was lost in the unfamiliar sensation of contentment.
We pulled up to my car in the parking lot of the cooking superstore, and Jed got out to walk me over.
I leaned back against the driver’s door as Jed took both of my hands. Nervousness found its way back, and a sense of sadness crept in as well. I hadn’t dated much, but I knew what was expected and what Jed hoped to get out of taking me out. And it would be nice to not be alone, even if only for a night. “I guess you’d like to come over tonight.”
Jed cupped my face, gently moving his thumb across my cheek. His voice was low, and he held my gaze. “Yes. I really would.”
I glanced down and nodded.
Jed brought my face back up with his thumb. “I really would, but I really like you. I don’t want to move too fast or do things before you’re ready. Beforeweare ready. We have plenty of time. I’d like to see you again. To continue to see you. Is that okay?”
I brought my hand up to cover Jed’s. I smiled. “I’d like that too.”
We simply gazed at each other for several moments.
Jed brought his head a little lower toward me. “May I kiss you?” I could smell the chocolate on his breath.
“Please.”
The kiss was easy. It was exactly what I thought a kiss from him would be like. Our bodies leaned into the car as one, mine arching up to meet Jed as he leaned lower. Jed’s arms encircled my back.
After a brief eternity, Jed pulled back, ran his finger over my lips, and whispered, “Good night, Brooke. Someday, I want to dance in an elevator with you.”
Five
I glancedover at Jed, his head lolled back onto the cushion of the seat, snoring lightly. I squeezed his hand gently so as not to wake him and returned my gaze out the window. We were too high to see the ground, but the day was bright and clear, and the clouds drifted by in a thick, swirling mass, mesmerizing me. Moments such as this had become a mixed blessing. At times, reflecting over the past nine months gave me a sense of peace I had previously never even considered possible. Other moments were filled with panic and abject terror as I realized how I had relinquished control of my emotions and let my guard down. My actions were a sure recipe for disaster and more pain. When this exploded in my face, I had no idea how I would be able to return to normal.
My time with Jed seemed little more than an instant, and yet trying to remember my life without his presence was nearly impossible. Jed had become the best friend I had ever known. He made me laugh, even at things that before would have kept me awake at night obsessing. There were even times when I felt attractive. Sure, I still didn’t have a six-pack, I hadn’t grown five inches or gotten a tan, but when I was in Jed’s presence, I felt like he was the only man who had ever existed.
Our relationship moved at a dizzying speed that I was sure would send us crashing into the waiting embrace of a hurricane. Not a single day passed where we had not seen each other. After the second week, we spent every night in each other’s arms, talking, laughing, debating, and dreaming. I’d expected Sandra and Christina to voice theirconcerns about my recklessness with Jed; however, both of them loved him, so they were in complete support. I was sure I’d give a long lecture to one of my kids if they were making such poor decisions. I would tell them to be logical, use your intelligence, not your emotions.
As with everything, I rationalized, nothing is ever so simple and clear cut. Sure, we were already acting like we were married, but in other ways, we behaved more like innocent little children on the schoolyard playground. While the kisses left me breathless and in a near hypnotic trance, we had yet to take full advantage of what our bodies had to offer. Jed was relentless in his assertion that we were not going to move too quickly in the sexual arena. At first, it was a relief and helped me trust that Jed wanted a real relationship. After several months, I did not feel like we needed to wait longer. The morning I walked in on Jed before he wrapped himself in a towel after a shower made me even more anxious to take our relationship to a more physical level. Thinking about Jed lying in bed in his varying assortment of briefs was enough to make me want to wake him up and pull him toward the airplane’s tiny bathroom.
And now, in what was sure to be the cataclysm that would lead to the destruction of all I was beginning to need and depend upon, here I was, over a mile in the air and on my way to meet Jed’s parents. On Christmas Eve, no less. What had I been thinking? I had let Jed’s soothing caresses and kisses lead me astray. That low, calming voice had convinced me to push the warp-speed button on the vehicle to implosion. Maybe I could scream “fire” or “bomb” and get them to land the plane in the nearest cornfield. Christmas in a jail cell would be preferable to a holiday of family drama and love festering into ash.
“So, you planning on throwing yourself through the window, or would you rather I call over a stewardess and have her open the door so you can launchrocket yourself through it?”
I looked over and saw Jed’s eyes sparkling at me. I took my hand back and placed it on my armrest. “They are called flight attendants, and launchrocket is not even a word, much less a verb.”
“Who would you correct endlessly without me in your life?” Jed reclaimed my hand and returned it to his lap.
I rolled my eyes and sighed. “Am I really that obvious? Do you think your parents will see how afraid I am?”
“Babe, you know I am fiercely attracted to your alabaster skin, but I can nearly see out the window through you at the moment. And yes, since my parents are part bloodhound, your fear will be a palpable appetizer for them.”
“Ass.” I flicked Jed’s ear and settled myself in the crook of his arm. “I’m not sure I can make it through this. You don’t realize how much this terrifies me.”
“Actually, I do. I knew when I asked you.” He ran his fingertips over my forearm. “It means so much to me that you’re willing to do this for me, even though it disorients you. Besides, I know my folks will love you. How could they not, when they see how happy you make me? I’m spoiled, remember? Always get what I want. Plus, you’ll have me by your side the entire time. What bad could possibly happen to you?”
