Jordan takes a breath, and there’s a long pause as he considers the question. “Okay, I guess I would phrase it like that,” he admits. “But I really was just trying to help her, man.”
“Sisters. Are. Off. Limits!” My brother bellows.
Jordan nods. “I know. I told her the same thing at the beginning. We never meant for it to get this far.”
I’m truly starting to get annoyed with them for talking about me like I’m not here, or worse, like I belong to Mike and can’t make my own decisions about who I let into my life. “I’m not some baseball card you can order your friends not to touch!” I snap at my brother. “I decide who I can and can’t talk to.”
The veins in Mike’s neck pop and he clenches his teeth before grinding out, “I know. You’re way more valuable than that, Shell. And, again,you’re the one who calledmeover here to help, remember?”
I guess I should be glad we’re glossing over the whole lack-of-orgasm admission, but this is getting ridiculous.
“Look, Jordan was amazing tonight. He was kind, and thoughtful, and sweet. He was a perfect gentleman.” My voice is rough because I’ve sobbed my throat raw. I chance a look at Jordan and immediately wish I hadn’t, because the searing pain pierces my chest yet again when my eyes lock with his. “I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything physical tonight. So he stopped—exactly like he should have—and I left. I knew I’d never be able to give him what he needed with this brain and this body.” My voice cracks on the final word, and I stop talking because the sobs are threatening to choke me again.
“Shelley,” Jordan whispers. He starts to take a step in my direction, but he freezes when I shake my head.
I wipe another stray tear away with the palm of my hand and turn to my brother. “Can we please go now? I’ll call a locksmith in the morning.”
“Yeah. Fine.” Mike tosses me his keys and motions to the door. “Wait in the truck. I’ll be down in a minute. I’m not finished with him.”
I want to protest, but I don’t have any fight left in me. So I leave, forcing myself not to look back.
Chapter 33
Jordan
Miller paces in front of me while he rubs his jaw with one hand. He shakes his head, still seeming at a loss for words until he finally barks at me. “Talk.”
“I’m really not sure you want to hear this.”
How am I supposed to give him details about why Shelley came to me asking for advice? He might think he wants to know, but I can promise he doesn’t.
“Oh, I definitely do. What the hell, Jordan? Start explaining.”
“It started a few weeks before your wedding. Like we told you, she accidentally sent me a message meant for someone else, and then we started talking sort of regularly. She needed advice, and I was trying to be a good friend.”
“A good friend would direct her to her brother for advice.”
“I don’t think either of you would’ve been comfortable with that.”
“What can my sister say to you that she can’t say to me?”
He looks so hurt and defeated, but it really wasn’t the betrayal he thinks it is. I take a deep breath and shake my head. “She just had a lot of questions, and she wanted to talk to a guy she could trust to be real with her but not get creepy. Those are her words. We weren’t trying to keep you in the dark about anything back then. Well, I guess we sort of were. But not in anefarious way. Just in a ‘this would be awkward to say to your brother’ way.”
“So, to be clear, you’ve been sneaking around with my little sister for months and giving her sex lessons?”
“Don’t make it sound underhanded. It wasn’t like that.”
“Wasn’t it, though? Why else would you feel the need to hide that you were talking to her?”
“You don’t understand.”
“No,youdon’t understand because you don’t have anyone in your life who means as much to you as my sisters mean to me.” His words land with a thud in my gut, and I swallow the little bit of bile that rises in my throat. I can’t even argue. It’s true. I don’t have any family who would step in for me the way the Millers are there for each other. And after this, I might not have them either. When he sees the stricken look on my face, Mike tries to walk it back. “Shit. That’s not what I meant.”
“Yes, it is. And maybe you’re right. We knew it would be hard for you to hear. Look, I’m sorry you found out this way. I am. But I’m not sorry for trying to be her friend. Shelley didn’t want to talk to you about it. The same way you don’t run to her when you need to talk to someone about a craving. Not every topic is sibling-safe.”
Mike sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. It might not be fair for me to use his addiction that way, but the gloves are off now. I want him to see he’s being a hypocrite here. He doesn’t get a say in Shelley’s love life, and he has no business getting on her case for asking a few innocent questions. Or mine for trying to answer them.
“Be honest. Have you slept with her?” He looks straight at me. I don’t answer, just hold his stare with one of my own. I told Shelley I wouldn’t talk to him about this, and I’mnot starting now. He heaves a disappointed sigh at my silence. “Just…keep your hands to yourself,” he mutters.
