“Hey… What’s wrong?” Cannon asks, gently stroking my cheek.
I shake my head, trying to rein in my feelings, but it’s like a dam has opened, and I can’t stop it.
Cannon twists toward me, reaches over, and pulls me into an awkward hug, pressing my face against his chest. He doesn’t care that I’m getting apple juice, tears, and dirt all over his shirt. He threads his fingers in my hair and simply holds me.
It feels so good. I shouldn’t let myself enjoy his touch because I obviously can’t keep it. He’s going to let me stay in his apartment for one night. Maybe he’ll buy me something hot to eat. I bet he’ll let me take a shower. I also bet he has nice soaps and shampoo. I wonder if he has a fresh toothbrush. I haven’t brushed my teeth in over a week. I ran out of toothpaste, and my toothbrush should have gone in the trash a month ago.
I manage to swallow the apple, but I can’t stop the tears.
Cannon doesn’t rush me. He rubs my back and kisses the top of my head. That makes me cry harder. “It’s okay, Little one. Let it out. No hurry.”
I need him to stop being so nice. It’s not helping the situation. I’m falling apart at the seams. Those seams have been held together by a single thread for a very long time. It was due to snap.
When I realize I’m getting not just tears on him but also snot, I pull back, sniffling. “I’m sorry.”
He lifts my chin with one finger. “It’s fine, angel. You’re welcome to cry on my shoulder anytime you need.” He gives me a gorgeous smile. He really is attractive. His beard felt so soft against my forehead. His smile is dazzling. And he smells so good. It’s his brand of soap, I think. And him, of course.
“Ready?”
I nod, still holding the apple in one hand. There’s no way I’m going to let it go. I want to eat every single part of it. It’s suddenly my most favorite food.
“Can I reach across you and buckle you in, Little one?”
I glance at my hand, which is now covered in apple juice. “Yes, please.”
He chuckles as he leans all the way over, pulls the seatbelt, and fastens it at my hip. “Big fan of apples, are you?”
I shrug. “I am now.”
“When did you last eat, angel?”
I shrug, not meeting his gaze this time. I’m embarrassed again. I have no reason to be. I’m down on my luck. I barely have a dollar to my name. He doesn’t need me to tell him these things.
His voice is very gentle as he says, “Let’s get your things from your car and then go to a drive-thru.”
“Thank you,” I whisper. I haven’t had fast food in years. It was an occasional treat when one of my foster families splurged for drive-thru meals, but that hasn’t happened since I was about seventeen. It’s not like anyone has offered me any sort of kindness like this since then.
He turns on the ignition and slowly drives out of the hidden spot and back onto the road. “What’s your favorite fast food, angel?”
I swallow another bite of the apple. I don’t know how to answer him. “Uh, burgers, I guess.”
“Which chain, silly girl?”
My chest tightens. Why is it so hard to admit how out of touch I am with the world? I don’t know why I feel so humiliated. There’s no reason. I shouldn’t apologize. It’s not my fault. Nothing that’s happened to me is. No matter what life has thrown at me, I know for a fact I didn’t do anything to deserve the bad hand I’ve been dealt.
I finish the apple, leaving almost nothing but the stem and the narrow core with the seeds. When I glance around, wondering what to do with it, Cannon tugs a tissue out of a box in the console and hands it to me.
I wrap it up and drop it gently on the floor before wiping my lips on my shirt again.
“There are some wet wipes in the glove box, I think, if you want to get the sticky off.”
I awkwardly reach for the lever, not wanting to get it dirty.
Cannon comes to a stop and glances at me. “Angel, I don’t give a fuck if my car gets sticky. In fact, the car is probably thanking you for messing it up a bit. It needed to be broken in. Just open the glove box.”
Suddenly, I release a strange, slight giggle at his humor. It sounds so foreign to me that I stop abruptly and bite my lip, not looking at him. I find the wipes, clean up my face and hands, and then swipe over the places I touched.
“Do you know which direction your car is, angel?”
