“About me,” McKenna added, surprised to know Dad had been talking to Mom about her. Although, she wasn’t sure why. The conversations Dad just mentioned were right up Mom’s alley.
“Our communication when you were younger was mainly just through email, though we did chat on the phone a few times a year. I called her after I got the invitation to come to your high school graduation. If it had just been a generic announcement thing, I probably wouldn’t have come. Simply because I didn’t want to take any of the attention away from you and your accomplishments. But you’d added a handwritten note that said you really hoped I could attend.”
McKenna recalled doing that. She’d addressed the envelope, and she had truly planned to just shove in the standard announcement. But at the last minute, she’d included the note, uncertain what was driving the request. “Mom convinced you to come?”
“She said she thought it was time. Past time, is what she actually said. I hope that was the right thing to do. Showing up, I mean.”
“It was,” McKenna said, flipping her hand over to grasp Dad’s. “I was glad you came. And happy when you showed up that fall during my freshman year at college to take me out for that big steak dinner. I was so over cafeteria food at that point. I guess I’m just glad that you kept calling and visiting.”
“Kenny, I’m not proud of the decision I made when I was twenty-one. I was a young, stupid, arrogant, selfish idiot. I thought hockey was the most important thing in the world. I was wrong. And your mother was too good to me, letting me walk away without cutting me out. I can’t tell you how much I loved getting those letters and photos.”
“The money you sent every month meant she could work less and spend more time raising me. We lived in a much nicer house in a safer neighborhood than we ever could have, if it had just been us on our own. And I mean, come on, some of those birthday and Christmas gifts you sent… I was the first kid in my class to get an iPad and a phone.”
“Your mom was less good to me after those gifts,” Dad joked. They shared a short laugh before he sobered up again. “Money was the least I could do. And I do mean the very least.”
“No, it’s not. You could have walked away completely and never looked back.”
“I have so many regrets about the way I handled things all these years.”
McKenna pushed her chair closer. “I don’t want you to see me and feel regret. That would just be,” she shrugged, “totally shitty.”
“You’re right,” Dad agreed. “It would be.”
“You told Mom you felt like this?”
He nodded.
“What did she tell you to do?” she asked.
Dad chuckled. “Talk to you.”
McKenna laughed as well, because Mom had hit them both with the same advice.
“Don’t screw things up with Tank because of what I did,” Dad said after several moments. “I fucked it all up. I’m not sure…” He rubbed his beard, leaning back. “I’m not sure Tank will.”
“What makes you say that?”
He toyed with the handle on his mug. “He’s different lately. Not quite the same swaggering idiot he was before that video.”
“I think he was scared straight by the possibility of losing his contract,” she muttered.
Dad shook his head. “No, it feels like more than that. Listen, I don’t have a lot of experience giving parental advice, but I’m going to give it a try. Don’t assume Tank will let you down just because I did, and because that asshole Eddie did. Maybe he’ll surprise you…in the best possible way. Wouldn’t you rather take a chance on finding love instead of hiding behind a lie because it’s safer?”
McKenna blew out a long breath, leaning back in her chair. “Damn, for someone with little experience, you just nailed that one.”
Dad grinned, then rose slightly so he could bend forward to give her a kiss on top of her head. It was the most affectionate Dad thing she’d ever experienced, and tears filled her eyes again. This time, though, they were happy ones.
“Thanks, Dad,” she said, her voice wobbly as she used that word for the second time. With each repetition, it felt better, more natural, right.
“And if the guy fucks up and lets the most gorgeous girl in the world slip through his fingers, just know that I will make his life a living hell on that ice.”
McKenna laughed, even though she was pretty sure from his tone and expression, he wasn’t joking around. “If he picks Lara over me, I’m going to let you do that.”
“You got my bloodthirsty nature,” Dad said, looking very pleased. “That’s good. It’ll serve you well. Do you think…” He paused, visibly uncertain. “Do you think we could start to let people know you’re my daughter? I understand if you still want to keep it on the down?—”
“I’d like to start telling people.” She hadn’t lied about wanting the chance to prove herself, and she felt like she had, so it might be nice to be able to talk about her dad without having to measure every word in case she slipped up.
Dad’s smile was brighter than the sun. “Good. Because I’ve been wanting to brag about you.”
