Atlas smiles brightly.“Thank God you’re taking her.I was afraid you’d make me change the diaper.”
“Coward,” I mutter, heading down the hall, but I happily read into his disdain for poop to mean there’s no way he wants to take on the challenge of parenting a baby.
He trails after me and watches silently as I change her diaper.I zip her into clean pajamas, noting the way her eyes are already heavy from the full belly of formula.When I lie her in the crib, I plug my phone into the speaker on her dressing table and flip through a folder of MP4s.A pause, then her father’s voice crackles through the room, horribly off-key as he sings “You Are My Sunshine.”
Atlas’s eyes widen.“That’s Gray.”Then his eyes shift to me with a smirk.“And wow.That’s…bad.”
“So bad,” I agree, then incline my head toward the baby.Her eyes are closed, her fist curled by her mouth.“But it works like a charm every time.”
Atlas inches toward the crib and peers in at Grayce.“When did he record that?”he asks softly.
“When the doctors told him that the treatment wasn’t working.”My voice cracks slightly and I clear my throat.“When it was clear that he was going to…” I can’t complete the sentence, even though it’s not only the truth, but it’s come true.“He spent hours making videos, recording songs, pieces of advice, well wishes for important moments in her life.So she’ll always have him.”
I dare to look at Atlas, and his eyes are misted, his smile steeped in love for his friend.We stand in silence watching Grayce sleep until Gray’s gravelly, off-key voice fades out.
“Come on,” I say, grabbing my phone.“Let’s eat.”
It takes no time at all to plate up the rice and sesame chicken.We sit at the table, both of us staring at our food but making no move to consume.
I put my fork down, not the least bit hungry because I can’t stand the not knowing.“Have you decided?”I ask.
His hazel eyes meet mine, steady and determined.“Yeah.I want to do as Gray asked.But I want to know how you feel about it.”
My heart sinks and a harsh laugh bubbles free.“How I feel?I’m basically going to be shackled to you for the rest of my life.”
Atlas blinks at the venom in my words.“I’m not that bad.”
“I don’t know if that’s true or not, but you do understand—this parenting thing is forever.We are going to be forever together.Not only that but I don’t want to leave Chicago, and I know that’s the only option since you sure as hell can’t leave Pittsburgh.But I’m going to be asked to give up my job, my entire life, here in Chicago and I didn’t ask for this.”
“I’m sorry,” he says, and it sounds genuine.“And you’re right, you’d have to come to Pittsburgh as my job is tied to that city.But I could try to get a trade to Chicago.”
My jaw drops as I stare at him in disbelief.“You wouldn’t do that.”
“I’m saying I could try, but it wouldn’t happen anytime soon.Trades aren’t going to occur until after the playoffs.But if you’re set on living in Chicago, I will do what I can.”
“Why would you want to do that?”I ask suspiciously.
“I don’t want to do it,” he says.“I want to stay in Pittsburgh.I have a real connection with this team.But I also understand it’s not fair to ask you to give up your life.”
I let out a long exhale as he’s just taken the wind out of my indignant sails.He did the one thing that was guaranteed to get me to accept this foolish situation, and that was to validate my fears and offer a possible solution to them.I didn’t think he had it in him.
“And you’re sure about this,” I press, holding on to that tiny glimmer of hope that he’ll come to his senses.“Because if you can’t do it, Gray would understand.I know he would.”
“Yeah, I’m sure.There’s no other choice because I know Gray would have done it for me if the situation were reversed.”
“He wouldn’t be mad if you said no,” I insist.“You know that, right?”
“Yeah, I know,” he says, his expression hardening.“I’ve known Gray longer than you.I knew him better than anyone, so I know exactly how far his grace and generosity extended.It’s that bond that makes the decision fairly easy.”
My entire being settles into a pool of despair because Atlas just sealed my fate.
“So, I’m moving to Pittsburgh,” I say glumly, my head spinning with all that will entail.I’ll have to quit my job, get out of my lease, arrange for my stuff to be shipped.
“If you think about it,” he says, voice low but firm, “it makes sense.I’ve got the resources.The support system.Grayce would have stability, opportunity.”
Anger flares hot again.“Don’t you dare imply I can’t give her a good life.”
“I didn’t say that,” he shoots back.“I’m saying you wouldn’t be doing it alone.Pittsburgh gives us the best shot to do this together.And Gray wanted us to do this together.”
