I said, “Jere, race me, okay?”
He shrugged and stood up, taking off his shirt. Then he walked over to the deep end and dove in. “You want a handicap?” he asked when he emerged up top.
“No. I think I can beat you without one,” I said, paddling over. “Whoo-hoo! Let’s see.”
We raced across the length of the pool, freestyle, andhe beat me the first time, and then the second. But I wore him down by the third and fourth and beat him too. Taylor cheered me on, which only annoyed me more.
The next morning she was gone again. This time, though, I was gonna join them. It wasn’t like she and Jeremiah owned the beach. I had just as much right as they did to watch the sunrise. I got up, put my clothes on, and headed outside.
I didn’t see them at first. They were farther down than usual, and they had their backs to me. He had his arms around her, and they were kissing. They weren’t even watching the sunrise. And… it wasn’t Jeremiah, either. It was Steven. My brother.
It was just like in those movies with the surprise ending, where everything falls into place and clicks. Suddenly my life had becomeThe Usual Suspects, and Taylor, Taylor was Keyser Soze. The scenes ran through the mind—Taylor and Steven bickering, the way he had come to the boardwalk that night, Taylor claiming that Claire Cho had cankles, all the afternoons she’d spent at my house.
They didn’t hear me walk up. But then I said, loudly, “Wow, so first Conrad, then Jeremiah, and now my brother.”
She turned around, surprised, and Steven looked surprised too. “Belly—,” she started.
“Shut up.” I looked at my brother then, and he squirmed.“You’re a hypocrite. You don’t even like her! You said she bleached out all her brain cells with her Sun-In!”
He cleared his throat. “I never said that,” he said, glancing back and forth between Taylor and me. Her eyes had welled up, and she was wiping her left eye with the back of her sweatshirt sleeve.Steven’ssweatshirt sleeve. I was too angry to cry.
“I’m telling Jeremiah.”
“Belly, just freakin’ calm down. You’re too old for your temper tantrums,” Steven said, shaking his head in his brotherly way.
The words came out of me, hot and fast and sure. “Go to hell.” I had never talked like that to my brother before. I don’t think I’d ever talked like that toanyonebefore. Steven blinked.
That’s when I started to walk away, and Taylor chased after me. She had to run to catch up, that’s how fast I was walking. I guess anger gives you speed.
“Belly, I’m so sorry,” she began. “I was going to tell you. Things just happened really fast.”
I stopped walking and spun around. “When? When did they happen? Because from what I saw, things were happening so fast withJeremy,not with my older brother.”
She shrugged helplessly, which only made me madder. Poor helpless little Taylor. “I’ve always had a crush on Steven. You know that, Belly.”
“Actually, I didn’t. Thanks for telling me.”
“When he liked me back, it was like, I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t think.”
“That’s the thing. He doesn’t like you. He’s just using you because you’re around,” I said. I knew it was cruel, but I also knew it was true. Then I walked into the house and left her standing outside.
She chased after me and grabbed my arm, but I shrugged her off.
“Please don’t be mad, Belly. I want things to stay the same with us forever,” Taylor said, brown eyes brimming with tears. What she really meant was, I want you to stay the same forever while I grow bigger breasts and quit violin and kiss your brother.
“Things can’t stay the same forever,” I said. I was saying it to hurt her because I knew it would.
“Don’t be mad at me, okay, Belly?” she pleaded. Taylor hated it when people were mad at her.
“I’m not mad at you,” I said. “I just don’t think we really know each other anymore.”
“Don’t say that, Belly.”
“I’m only saying it because it’s true.”
She said, “I’m sorry, okay?”
I looked away for a second. “You promised you’d be nice to him.”
